Sometimes true wisdom comes from a place where you'd least expect it.
A family friend is a lovely, intelligent young woman who has worked very hard to put herself through school, buy a condo and furnish it in a comfortable, stylish fashion. She inherited some lovely things from her parents and grandparents. She started dating a man who raised alarm bells among her friends. He had no job, no money, crashed on the sofas of various friends and borrowed her car frequently because he had none. But she loved the guy, so she married him. Less than a year later, she showed up in the ER with a broken nose, broken ribs and bruises all over. Her husband, although he insists that she fell down the stairs, has cut and swollen hands.
It seems the poor girl is really clumsy and falls down the stairs a lot. "She should leave him," my husband said. "She shouldn't have to take that." "Why doesn't she leave him?" Asked the child's biological mother. "Why stay with an abusive loser?" The child's stepfather says that if she was HIS kid, he'd "take care of that man," and gestured to his wall of gleaming swords and knives.
The child, who it seems is wise beyond her years, said "Why should SHE leave? It's her house, her stuff, and HE's the one causing the problem."
Quote from Ruby Vee
If you live in a community property state, he becomes part owner of the house just by virtue of being married and you need his signature on the paperwork. Plus you owe him part of the proceeds of the sale but not, it seems a part of the debt if you sell your house for less than you owe the bank. Besides, it is quite difficult to interest someone in buying your house when there is someone living in it who is a degenerate slob and points out the flaws to every potential buyer who enters.
I live in a community property state, and a house purchased before marriage is separate property, not community property. He doesn't get half of the house just by virtue of being married. The problem would be if he is making payments on the house. That kind of co-mingling could well present problems, but that is something a lawyer could clarify.
Who Owns What in Marital Property? - FindLaw
Any assets acquired before the marriage are considered separate property, and are owned only by that original owner. A spouse can, however, transfer the title of any of his or her separate property to the other spouse (gift) or to the community property (making a spouse an account holder on bank account). Spouses can also comingle their separate property with community property, for example, by adding funds from before the marriage to the community property funds.
Separate and Community Property During Marriage: Who Owns What? | Nolo.com
Community Property States
If you live in a community property state, the rules are more complicated. But in general:
- spouses own equally almost all property either one acquires during the marriage, regardless of whose name the property is in
- half of each spouse's income is owned by the other spouse during the marriage, and
- debts incurred during marriage are generally debts of the couple.
In community property states, the following is separate property:
- gifts given to one spouse
- property either spouse owned before the marriage and kept separate during the marriage, and
Last edit by Horseshoe on Oct 14, '16