Diabetes/Renal Failure

SharonH, RN · May 25, 2006

I'm sorry that your brother is not doing well. Each person's prognosis is individual depending on other health factors so there is no way you can guess by comparing him to other people. However, I do have an uncle who has been on dialysis for over 20 years now since the age of 25.

emsjunkie2001 · May 25, 2006

Thank you that is what I was wanting to know.

TazziRN, RN · May 25, 2006

People can live a long time on dialysis, but it doesn't sound like your brother has good quality to his life right now. Forgive me for being blunt, I didnt know how else to say it. Is he a candidate for a kidney transplant? If he is, that would change his physical well being immensely.

emsjunkie2001 · May 25, 2006

It is ok for being blunt, it is what I trying to find out. He does not have good quality to his life right now. He acts like he does not get it that he could die from this or maybe he just does not understand it. He is 33 but he acts like he has the mind of a teenager.

Before hurricane Katrina they were talking about a transplant for his kidney and pancreas. But since the storm he has gone down fast and is steadly falling faster. We were told by a doctor he would not make it 6 months and he is still holding on after a year and a half. I know he is not going to be able to take much more with his body in this condition I was just looking for a little hope with him.

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

I know you can't really give me answers to my questions, so I am just looking to some hope. How long can someone live by taking dailysis/diabetes? My brother is 33 yr old diabetic and has been on dialysis for 5 yrs. He has gone blind from his diabetes and was born deaf and has been in and out of the hospital so many times I can't keep count with them anymore. But this time I am not so sure he is going to be coming out. He is is starting to have heart trouble now and it's not looking good. They are wanting to do a quadruple bypass on him but doctors are unsure if he will make it through the surgery.
I know I should not be thinking so negative, but it is so hard to see my little brother suffering this way. Everyday I ask myself just how much more can he take. I know that some people go through more than this in their lives but it is so hard to have to watch your own family member going through this.
I can really sympathize with you. My father had a kidney transplant in 1985 that lasted 15 years. He had to go back on dialysis. He even tried peritoneal dialysis, but got peritonitis. He was miserable on dialysis for 5 more years. The doctor told us 5 years was about an average life span for someone in his condiiton...he also had major cardiac problems and diabetes.
My father died Sept. 2005. He fought until the end. I felt for a long time that dialysis was not a good way to live, it takes so much to go through that. He had to have multiple catheter sites as well, he went through a lot...along with an amputated leg, artificial hip and multiple cardiac surgeries.
He was in and out of the hospital multiple times and also struggled with a lot of pain...but he was very strong about it all. The last time he was in the hospital he had fractured his hip after trying to do too much for himself in his wheelchair.
Stay strong for your brother. My dad was 62. Your brother is young, so maybe he can still get a transplant if his heart isn't too bad.
Sorry to hear your struggle. You can always talk to me, I understand.
Take care

emsjunkie2001 · May 25, 2006

I am really trying to stay strong, but this is so hard to do. Waiting on the results from the cath lab on what they are going to have to do to him. He is starting to build up fluid in his lungs also. I am praying hard that they can help him. I guess I am more scared that he will not pull through this time. thank you for the encouragement that it is giving me and for talking to me about this.

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

I am really trying to stay strong, but this is so hard to do. Waiting on the results from the cath lab on what they are going to have to do to him. He is starting to build up fluid in his lungs also. I am praying hard that they can help him. I guess I am more scared that he will not pull through this time. thank you for the encouragement that it is giving me and for talking to me about this.

I understand your fear of him not making it. I felt that way each time my dad was in the hospital. I have had to accept that he isn't suffering anymore. Dialysis is awful, and not a way to live. it may be your brother's time to go, we don't know for sure what will happen and nobody is ever really prepared for a family member to leave , I know.

emsjunkie2001 · May 25, 2006

I am trying to look at it as he will not be suffering anymore if he doesn't make it.It will be hard to do but as long as I think of all the good times we had as kids it will be easier to handle. I know we are never perpared to lose a family member but it happens everyday to people. it is a something that I have to deal with then the time comes.

nurseblondi · May 25, 2006

i can relate to & understand your situation from a personal perspective. I am a nurse who has diabetes - was diagnosed when i was 16 months old. I have had multiple eye surgeries & have renal dysfunction but it has been stable for about 6 years now. as another note, my husband's mother died 3 years ago from PKD - she was on dialysis for only 8 months or so - and his oldest brother also has PKD & has been waiting for a transplant for 2 years. but he so far has not had to start dialysis, but his time is running out.

do you have trust in the care your brother is receiving? it can't hurt to get other opinions. are there any support groups in your area to help you & your family (as well as your brother) through this difficult & tiring process.

dialysis, like everything else in life, is what you make of it. yes it may be time consuming & limiting, but there are people i know personally who have been on dialysis for over 20 years & even though it was bad at times, they are glad they made the decision they did.

as others have already said, the disease effects everyone differently. for me personally, i don't want to have any "what if's".

Antikigirl, ASN, RN · May 25, 2006

Sounds like a sit down with his MD's is in order! Get the prognosis from them in a way YOU need! Write down your questions, and get the answers in a way you understand (I mean if they start going off with terms you do not understand, ask them to break it down a bit...I even have to do that sometimes!).

If things are not looking good, then this would be a great opportunity to get an advanced directive solidified so that there is no doubt what his wishes are! People tend to shy from that, and well...go figure that isn't an easy thing at all..but must be done! Especially who can speak for him if he can't! Very important!

Also, talk of hospice options if needed. Hospice is wonderful and provides patient and family with support and comfort during times when it is most needed. Some places have 'transitions' which isn't "going to die in 6 months" type of deal, but a transition into full hospice when it is needed or cancled if not needed...just an easier transition into total hospice care, and preparations for the mind body and spirit if they need full hospice. They can provide bathing services, comfort care, spiritual assistance as requested, and much much more! Check into that...even if you don't need it now or won't for a long time...it is worth getting some info now, vs doing it on a moments notice!

I am sorry for what is happening...and I hope all the best for your brother (I have one 33 year old one too...and I feel he has the mind of a teen too..LOL!) and your family.

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

Sounds like a sit down with his MD's is in order! Get the prognosis from them in a way YOU need! Write down your questions, and get the answers in a way you understand (I mean if they start going off with terms you do not understand, ask them to break it down a bit...I even have to do that sometimes!).
If things are not looking good, then this would be a great opportunity to get an advanced directive solidified so that there is no doubt what his wishes are! People tend to shy from that, and well...go figure that isn't an easy thing at all..but must be done! Especially who can speak for him if he can't! Very important!
Also, talk of hospice options if needed. Hospice is wonderful and provides patient and family with support and comfort during times when it is most needed. Some places have 'transitions' which isn't "going to die in 6 months" type of deal, but a transition into full hospice when it is needed or cancled if not needed...just an easier transition into total hospice care, and preparations for the mind body and spirit if they need full hospice. They can provide bathing services, comfort care, spiritual assistance as requested, and much much more! Check into that...even if you don't need it now or won't for a long time...it is worth getting some info now, vs doing it on a moments notice!
I am sorry for what is happening...and I hope all the best for your brother (I have one 33 year old one too...and I feel he has the mind of a teen too..LOL!) and your family.

Thank you for pointing out these things...we were not really given good information about my dad. I do feel that hospice probably knows a lot more about pain control than a regular hospital.