confrontation in the workplace

Nurses General Nursing

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It seems that there is more being said about violence and confrontation in the workplace in regards to nursing. This is a somewhat understandable trend considering the increasing stresses facing nurses and the health care system with shortages, budget cuts, staff cuts, and yet a continuously expanding role and expectations.

This violence is present at several different levels; nurse to nurse, patient to nurse, nurse to nursing student, and other health care professionals to nurse.

With increased awareness comes increased ability to deal with it through appropriate channels. I have faced a few situations as a student in the clinical setting that have created feelings of unease for me. Learning new skills, new procedures and protocols can be quite distressing when first beginning in a new unit. Unfortunately, an accepting atmosphere is far from reality in my experiences. True, it is just as stressful on the nurses having us students on the floor. Somehow there has to be a happy medium that can be reached, right?

I went to a workshop regarding workplace conflict resolution, and many levels of workplace resources have available information, courses, and support networks. But does the awareness and resources make a difference? What options are available to assist in making a workplace more tolerable? What does one do when the communication "scripts" don't work? Any horror stories and how you dealt with them?

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Specializes in ICU.

Do a search on "bullying" on this BB and stand back or be overwhelmed by the sheer number of threads there has been on it. No resources do not help to abate the problem - insight does. One of the nastiest bullies I ever had the misfortune to deal with was a senior nurse educator who could quote chapter and verse all the strategies of "good" managment but just did not know how to apply them and could not see in herself those traits that made her a bully.

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Specializes in Community Health Nurse.

welcome fluffybear :balloons:

nursing is a rough place to work today, but somebody's got to do it...right? :o

there's no way to sugarcoat the abuse being passed in the workplace today, and that abuse is just not in nursing either. i've never before experienced the type of abuse anywhere i've worked in all my working years as i see going on in the hospitals today, particularly on the floors where there are more patients than staff to safely care for them. :o

as for those "communication scripts", i feel sorry for the poor trees being killed to make the paper that is wasted printing them. :rolleyes: i guess somebody with an advance degree needed to feel important enough to be assigned such a task.

all we can do is our best, give our best, and pray for the best. :o

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Some days I feel like a puppet on a string...I go to work and 'everybody has a bone to pick' with nurses. Everybody is gripy, disrespectful...not so much nurse to nurse, but the doctors, xray, RT's, patient friends and family...all demanding excessive attention and critical towards nurses. They all seem to think they are our boss and we need to be controlled. We seem to be the butt of their anger...scapegoats for the system. We can never do enough for them either. We seem to be viewed as subservient to so many folks out there...and they have no idea what we do, don't care and are downright ugly and disrespectful.

It is a real challenge to remain professional and try to stay positive AND do today's difficult nursing work someplace where disrespect and abuse is reality. Which of course is why so many have left the profession.

Bad management people who tolerate ugly, disrespectful workers are a big part of the problem. So many times if I or my nurse coworkers report a rude xray tech or RT, it comes back to bite us in the form of retribution from the offender's coworkers and managers. Our own managers buckle and tell us to 'get along'. So the abuse is perpetuated. We are supposed to 'take it'.

This is a bad week, can ya'll tell?? LOL!! It is hard to take sometimes.

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"They all seem to think they are our boss and we need to be controlled."

Isn't that the truth, you couldn't have said it any better!

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Being a good nurse and being a good employee is more and more at odds with situations we are placed in everyday at work. Being a good nurse, a good emplyee and a "doormat" for abusive patients, families, disrespectful NM, CN, and doctors is a position I refuse to maintain. I don't see this situation changing so I have and will vote with my feet. Each nurse must decide what we can or will tolerate and follow that decision firmly. I want to treat my patients and coworkers with respect, kindness, and dignity. I expect to be treated in a like manner. Hopefully, I will find a position that has this type of environment and ethic soon.

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Lately I have been written up by a RT for 'unprofessional behavior' (like they know what unprofessional behavior is for nurses when they aren't nurses) .The reason he felt I was unprofessional?? Because I was assertive, asked him (after he was rude to me) if he was just having a particularly bad day or what...we all tolerate a little more if someone admits they are having a lousy day and apologizes. When he said no, I then asked him to please be more respectful to his coworkers and that includes me. This was unprofessional in his eyes...nurses are professional doormats I guess.

I'm now trying to frame my response to this writeup...which was sent to MY manager(bypassing chain of command, he should have talked to HIS manager by policy).

Any suggestions to how best to handle ugly rude employees of OTHER departments????

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Specializes in ER!.

Bad management people who tolerate ugly, disrespectful workers are a big part of the problem. So many times if I or my nurse coworkers report a rude xray tech or RT, it comes back to bite us in the form of retribution from the offender's coworkers and managers. Our own managers buckle and tell us to 'get along'. So the abuse is perpetuated. We are supposed to 'take it'.

Oh, boy, mattsmom, you said it. Two places I've worked really stand out in my mind, not just because of how awful they were, but how the bullies were coddled by the management. Management knew they were a problem, but never took any action other than to say weakly, "Let's everyone just get along, OK?". So good nurses left, management never lifted a finger, and so the inmates ended up running the asylum. I've heard that several agency nurses have refused to work in one of my former facilities because the bullying is so awful, and the bullies are just allowed to run over everyone.

What I want to know is, how do people get away with this kind of behavior? I wouldn't dream of being rude to someone, talking nasty behind her back, or flat out making up ugly rumors; I'm just not that way, but I'd also assume management would ask me, "Just who do you think you are that you should be allowed to behave this way?" That has always puzzled me. Also, I'm the first to admit that I wouldn't be a very good manager- that's why I've never searched for or accepted a management position. I say that if you accept the job, then dang it, manage! Make this nonsense stop!

Climbing off my soapbox....

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About a year ago I attended a workshop on handling confrontation in the workplace. If somebody is in your face, and you aren't ready to deal with them, tell them you'll meet them in 5 minutes (or 10, 15) in breakroom/medroom/storage room. This gives you a chance to think for a few minutes and cool down before going in to face the situation. Gives you a chance to decide what to say and prevents you from saying anything rash. This tactic has worked for me several times in the workplace since I learned it.

You can use it with coworkers, patients, or patient's family members (provided this does not put you in a dangerous situation).

If you feel endangered at all, remove yourself from the situation. Get away, call for help, but DON'T stick around and get hit or worse.

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Aw, come on, how can there be good coustomer service if the door mat isn't placed over the nurses backs?

oops, did I just type this and hit the submit button :chair:

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Aw, come on, how can there be good coustomer service if the door mat isn't placed over the nurses backs?

oops, did I just type this and hit the submit button :chair:

Yes seems to be the expectation in today's hospitals (at least mine) We are getting more and more treadmarks on the backs of our scrubs... :angryfire

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About a year ago I attended a workshop on handling confrontation in the workplace. If somebody is in your face, and you aren't ready to deal with them, tell them you'll meet them in 5 minutes (or 10, 15) in breakroom/medroom/storage room. This gives you a chance to think for a few minutes and cool down before going in to face the situation. Gives you a chance to decide what to say and prevents you from saying anything rash. This tactic has worked for me several times in the workplace since I learned it.

You can use it with coworkers, patients, or patient's family members (provided this does not put you in a dangerous situation).

If you feel endangered at all, remove yourself from the situation. Get away, call for help, but DON'T stick around and get hit or worse.

This is good advice. I have found with this particular RT (and now his buddies)is I am to the point of needing a witness around and am careful not to be alone around him. I luckily have a good reputation while he has numerous writeups for rudeness, etc. but now he has his buddies trying to pick fights with me, twisting situations on a daily basic, and writing ME up and in general causing trouble ....so it seems to becoming a mobbing situation. He has been around for years and seems to excape firing for his infractions...I hear whispered advice that he 'plays the race card', and some of my coworkers have even warned me not to push this or I will not win...but I can't handle the abuse anymore.

Gwenith how do you suggest I handle this, since you seem to be our resident guru for handling bullying and mobbing? I'd really appreciate some advice.

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