I am in the last few months of school before I become an RN. Last night I found myself balling for no apparant reason and noticed it's a pattern lately. I do not know if it is burnout or what. I am almost there and yet I feel as though I have already exhausted all my energy and there is nothing much left to give to finish. I am soooooo tired of being tired, of feeling so utterly exhausted that I am now a raving caffeine addict (cardiac arrythmias and all to go with it). I am so tired of never seeing my daughter and my fiancee, and trying to explain to this 3 year old why I am not there for her- breaks my heart!
I am so tired of being put-down by instructors that seem to thrive off of degrading people and slowly wittling away their only shreds of self-concept. That, along with the BS instructors that you have to kiss a** just to pass. I feel like this has just become too much. I have NO life outside of nursing and my GOD, I just want this to be over already. Thank you for letting me vent as nobody understands the way someone that has been through it could!