Abusers Win

  1. 22
    I've lost. They are terminating me. I reported abuse to state. Now I'm terminated. Trying to go on with my life. Got a phone call from a coworker little while ago. She dumped with me way serious other abuse going on in the facility. She said that she, too, reported it to the same supervisor. Nothing. Now...here I am, jobless. I'm trying to move on...I cut her off and made an excuse that I had to go. She said that she didn't trust anyone and that she admired me for what I did. I guess that is why she felt she could tell me. But now...I just hate nursing. If I call state again, they won't believe me. My investigation is still underway. If I turn my head, I'm no better than that supervisor. I hate nursing. How did I get here?

    If I could just take care of my patients, smile, heal their wounds, talk to them, educate them, share stories and provide that level of care that I want to.....

    But no...

    This is what nursing really is.

    And I hate it. I hate being put in this situation.
    kiyasmom, Jarnaes, anonymous1919, and 19 others like this.
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  4. 27 Comments so far...

  5. 3
    I understand. I got my RN license because I wanted to be the one who said "you can't do that"....My first two years in nursing I learned the hard way that direct care staff will all the sudden go blind, deaf and dumb when questioned by state or administration for that matter, and I also learned not to go to administration or my don but to call state. This "violates" the "chain of command", but too many times of watching "internal investigations" go awry has taught me not to trust my supervisors to do the right thing. I AM THE Licensed Professional and I will turn in abuse, I Will protect my patients and my license. There are whistle blower laws and you should check into them. Good Luck.
    canoehead, orkbrother, and crippersmom like this.
  6. 4
    I don't know what else to say (well besides the fact that the whole situation sounds like a whole lotta, well you know).

    All I can do is send you a great big internet hug and wish you all the best.
    mcl10109, crippersmom, sharpeimom, and 1 other like this.
  7. 5
    Quote from crippersmom
    I've lost. They are terminating me. I reported abuse to state. Now I'm terminated. Trying to go on with my life. Got a phone call from a coworker little while ago. She dumped with me way serious other abuse going on in the facility. She said that she, too, reported it to the same supervisor. Nothing. Now...here I am, jobless. I'm trying to move on...I cut her off and made an excuse that I had to go. She said that she didn't trust anyone and that she admired me for what I did. I guess that is why she felt she could tell me. But now...I just hate nursing. If I call state again, they won't believe me. My investigation is still underway. If I turn my head, I'm no better than that supervisor. I hate nursing. How did I get here?

    If I could just take care of my patients, smile, heal their wounds, talk to them, educate them, share stories and provide that level of care that I want to.....

    But no...

    This is what nursing really is.

    And I hate it. I hate being put in this situation.
    I am so sorry this happened and even sorrier to say that this is not surprizing. Situations like these are what drives bedside nurses away from the field in droves. And, I could be wrong, but what makes it worse is that with the job market being the way it is, nurses are forced to remain and be victim to similar treatment because they have their own lives to worry about. So many of us walked into this thinking that we can make a difference, and I believe that we can, but because we have no support more shy away than stand up. It makes you say "WHY?"

    I sincerely wish the best for you in your hour of need.
    kiyasmom, netglow, barbyann, and 2 others like this.
  8. 3
    How awful. You can't win. If you know about abuse and don't report it then you are a party to the crime, no?

    Don't know what else to say but all the best in finding another job and remember that you didn't do anything wrong.
  9. 1
    I'm so sorry this happened to you. You did the right thing.

    BTW, I'm not sure state would disbelieve you if you called again. On the other hand, if an investigation is underway, they will hopefully find out about the other incidents of abuse.

    I've been through something similar myself and it was emotionally devastating. I don't know what the outcome of my situation will be except that I quit my position. I could no longer work in a facility that tacitly condoned staff ineptitude and negligence that resulted in actual harm. The DON knew how I felt and I would not be surprised if he/she is retaliating against me when I seek other employment.

    Nevertheless, no job is worth sacrificing your personal and professional integrity. You are right; the facility is wrong. Hopefully karma will bite them in the backside SOON!

    Prayers and best wishes for you at this very difficult time. (And please check your private messages.)
    Last edit by Moogie on May 21, '09 : Reason: addition
    crippersmom likes this.
  10. 2
    If I turn my head, I'm no better than that supervisor.
    You are right and in a way you have "won" by keeping the ideals you should.

    Maybe I am mistaken, but I thought you could report anon?
    Poopsiebublnose and crippersmom like this.
  11. 0
    I reported a verbal abuse incident and exactly nothing was done about it.
    I wasn't fired for reporting it, but their so-called investigation said the charges were "unfounded".
    And I swear to you all, that right here in front of God and everybody, I told the truth about what was said.
    But they said I didn't have a witness. Well, WTH??? I go in there to do my work and I am by myself with the rest of the staff working in there who are not in my department. So how can I have a witness??? I am one nurse......I am alone when in there doing my med pass. How or where can I get a witness? Pull one out of a hat? They are going to stick together....they won't stick by me, because they are together in their department and I am in medical.
    No one else would come forward and support me. I had to report it myself. And they gave the abuser a "lie detector" test.....something that is not even admissable in a court of law because they are so unreliable.....and he passed the lie detector.
    So there you go. It does no good to report anything.
    If you don't have someone to stand up with you and support you, you're screwed.
    And therefore so is your patient who you're trying to do right by.

    But you know what....things do have a way of coming back around.......
    The same person I reported, I believe, is now under another investigation.
    Altho, another patient had to suffer a physical injury to get it this far.
    If they had listened to me the first time, this second one may not have happened. But I could be wrong, though.....I don't have details. Since I'm not involved with this second one, all I hear is info from the sidewalk.
    But time will tell the story. And I can be patient.
    And God knows the truth, too.
  12. 0
    Quote from catlynlpn
    i reported a verbal abuse incident and exactly nothing was done about it.
    i wasn't fired for reporting it, but their so-called investigation said the charges were "unfounded".
    and i swear to you all, that right here in front of god and everybody, i told the truth about what was said.
    but they said i didn't have a witness. well, wth??? i go in there to do my work and i am by myself with the rest of the staff working in there who are not in my department. so how can i have a witness??? i am one nurse......i am alone when in there doing my med pass. how or where can i get a witness? pull one out of a hat? they are going to stick together....they won't stick by me, because they are together in their department and i am in medical.
    no one else would come forward and support me. i had to report it myself. and they gave the abuser a "lie detector" test.....something that is not even admissable in a court of law because they are so unreliable.....and he passed the lie detector.
    so there you go. it does no good to report anything.
    if you don't have someone to stand up with you and support you, you're screwed.
    and therefore so is your patient who you're trying to do right by.

    but you know what....things do have a way of coming back around.......
    the same person i reported, i believe, is now under another investigation.
    altho, another patient had to suffer a physical injury to get it this far.
    if they had listened to me the first time, this second one may not have happened. but i could be wrong, though.....i don't have details. since i'm not involved with this second one, all i hear is info from the sidewalk.
    but time will tell the story. and i can be patient.
    and god knows the truth, too.
    yep(thankfully) things do have a way of coming back around on a person. there's a med aide at my work who retaliated(my interpretation) against me for always being on her case over following up on her prns, correcting her on her inappropriate responses to patients. she accused me of pt abuse(an absolute lie and totally unfounded). she's now in deep doo-doo for fabricating a reason for being on fmla (medical leave)....i.e., making a fraudulent claim. i certainly hope she gets a severe punishment.
  13. 0
    Wow. I'm really sorry. I don't know what else to say.


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