Womens interest in male nurses

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I am a nursing student, currently studying to be an RN. I am really enjoying the experience, however I have an issue that is concerning me.

When chatting up women and the conversation comes up about what I do, and I reply studying nursing, their eyes widen and the mood seems to change. This is not related to women in the field but those outside. As soon as I utter the word nurse, I seem to go from a confident manly guy to a nice guy to them. I know women want confident manly sort of men, but women also say they like a man to be sensitive and caring. Can’t a male nurse be sensitive and manly? Do these women see nurses as somewhat effeminate, at worst gay?

If a woman is able to climb the corporate ladder and make big money in business and still have sex appeal, does a man need to limit himself to traditional masculine roles to prove his maleness and be attractive to women or can he do a traditionally feminine job of helping and caring for people.

I understood that when women refer to equality, it is for both men and women. They it’s a great idea for men to be nurses, but individually, their actions seem to speak louder than their words.

I would be very interested in your opinions on this both guys and girls

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Specializes in midwifery, ophthalmics, general practice.

ah the word 'nurse' means different things to different people!!

When training I never ever told a man I was a nurse... because over here nurses had a reputation for leaping into bed with anything that wore trousers!! I really hope thats changed now........... I think I'm too old to have that response now!!!

However... I still avoid saying I'm a nurse practitioner.. bacause if I do admit to it.. I then have to explain what a nurse practitioner is/what I do... then I have to say I'm off duty and please, I dont need to know all about your medical history and no I cant help with this/that or the other!!!

maybe men in nursing are more caring than men outside nursing. its not my experiance... the men i know who are nurses have the same evil sense of humour as me.. they have had the same life experiences as me and I get on very well with them... but the nicest, most 'in touch with his feelings' man i know is an engineer! he works part time as counsellor for samaritans and is just the nicest human being anyone could hope to meet.

Karen

ps.. my spelling is awful today.... but you do spell humour with a U!!

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I had the same problem that you are having when I went through Nursing School 14 years ago, it was probably a little worse. Male nurses have been rising year by year. I remember going back to my hometown where I played football, baseball, basketball and when my friends and teachers, coaches found out I was in Nursing School they joked to me about it but also gave me nothing but respect. I also had room mates in college that would pick on me but when I had a job 3 weeks before I graduated and my roommates couldn't even get an interview, the most "manly" of my roommates went and applied for nursing school and is now a nurse. It's a stereotype that will probably always be there but you just can't let it get to you, once your done with school you'll find you will find that it will change. The funniest thing that I find is that people/peers distinguish me as a "male nurse" as opposed to a nurse. FYI, my friends that would pick on me in school were also the same friends who wanted me to invite all my nursing student friends to the parties cause they were mostly women :wink2: . Good luck..

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Specializes in Psych, Med/Surg, LTC.

I am a female RN so I don't really belong here. But I wanted to say that I think its hot for a man to not be afraid to do something thought of as "less manly". It shows that he is a real man! :redpinkhe

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Specializes in Ultrasound guided peripheral IV's..

Less manly?

Let me show them the Peri/Rectal/Scrotal abcess that one of my male patients had I&D'd yesterday, and we will see who is "Less Manly"! It would have the most manly man runnin for the hills! Only a Super Man can become a nurse!

Can you say OUCH!

Dan

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On a rather esoteric note... why do we need to use the moniker "male nurse"?

Perhaps we may think of the "wet nurse" or of suckling infants at the breast. However, I think that with respect for the historical understanding, "nurse" suits perfectly.

I've heard remarks from women, in an out of healthcare, whom have said things like, "oh, we need more men in nursing," etc. and I simply continue to listen. Of course, I wholeheartedly agree... but I wonder what their motivation is for saying such a thing. So, I simply shut up-n-listen. Besides, isn't that a great way to learn?

Anywho... there are folks whom think that nursing is wiping behinds (and it is) but it's also seeing to the care of a child who just barfed his meager lunch up in front of his classmates, and doing whatever it takes to make him feel better.

And, it's giving tender and compassionate care to the HIV+ Black gay male whose face was bashed in by hate mongerers, and giving equally compassionate care to the crack ***** whose infected legs stink from the pus-filled gangrenous masses where she shot speedballs, and it is the simple quiet way in which you look into a person's eyes whom cannot speak English and hold their hand - assuring them you care.

What's so weird about having a human connection? Does it make women or men think differently about a man who cares? I dunno... I can tell you one thing, though... they'll remember the one whom cared much longer than the one who couldn't care less.

Caring doesn't emasculate men. Caring empowers men.

(And I REALLY like the post about being a Super Man!)

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Specializes in ER/Trauma.

It takes a special kind of person to be unbiversally accepting of others.

To love and care for another human being just because they are human beings.

To seek out and help those in desperate need.

To heal wounds - both mind and body - caused by self or others.

To be responsible for the life and well being of another.

To be truly blind to all matters of caste, creed, colour, wealth or race when dealing with another.

To know deep within your heart that what you do everyday makes a positive impact on the lives of many, often total strangers.

To spend life in the service of humankind (and occassionaly, the animal kind too!)

All these and more are the reasons I choose to do what I do. To me, this has nothing to do with "feminine" or "masculine" or "macho". These are but mere words and they pale in significance in light of our chosen work.

I'm happy with what I do and if people want to judge me because of this - then frankly it's their loss, not mine.

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Specializes in Ultrasound guided peripheral IV's..

Roy,

Could not have said it better myself!

Dan

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Specializes in ER/Trauma.

Dan,

Without the spelling and grammatical mistakes ofcourse! :rolleyes: :chuckle

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Specializes in NICU.

I really wish the world would start to see nursing as a unisex profession.

Now, I'm married, but if I were single and met a nurse that happened to be a man - I'd be interested. You know right off that this guy is going to be smart, educated, caring, and compassionate. Plus, you know that he will always have a job and will have a flexible schedule. What's not to love? I just don't get women sometimes, and I AM one!!!

Just keep your chin up, and be proud of who you are.

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Hey Johny, if they are not even going to give a chance just because your studying to be a nurse, do you really want someone that shallow? It really is their loss if that's the case. Believe me there are plenty of single women just looking for a nice, caring, compasionate guy, which IMO is very competent and manly.

BTW Roy, excellent post.:yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah:

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thanks to all you guys and girls for your support .

i think that many women underestimate men and their ability to lead diverse roles. if a man chooses to become a nurse, he is willing to tap into his caring side (not feminine side, women don't have a monopoly on caring!;)), which all men have; this does not negate his masculinity. on the contrary, if he is confident and stands up for and supports himself and others in his care, he can only enhance his masculinity and shows courage to go against the sheep following the status quo. maybe if some women understood this(and men too!), such multifaceted men might intimidate them, so they would prefer to assume male nurses were somewhat effeminate.

the world evolves by individuals going off the beaten track, often risking ridicule to show the masses what is possible.

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