what to say???

  1. I have a question what do you all think is ok to say to a patient when they start crying??? I dont know what to say. I know we dont just say "it will be ok" but what do you say Example: You walk into the room and as how are you doing? the patient starts crying saying I just lost my husband??? I am always at a loss of words and wanted to see how you all handle that?! Thanks!
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  2. 15 Comments

  3. by   Darlene K.
    It all depends. Sometimes I don't say anything, just let the patient talk, and give them a hug. Be sincere, don't say everything will be alright, because sometimes it isn't. I almost always call the Chaplain to come and speak with the patient. That is their speciality.
  4. by   slinkeecat
    It depends...

    Usually, I say I am so sorry for your loss.... and then I try to open a dialoge with them.... I ask if they would like some thing to drink ... offer tissues, let them say what's on their minds... some times they want an ear....nothing more ..nothing less....
  5. by   suzanne4
    Sometimes just sitting there and holding their hand is the best medicine. It will depend on the patient and circumstances each and every time.
  6. by   Jami RN
    The therapeutic communication phrase we learned in nursing school was: "That must be so hard for you."

    I can't count how many times I've used that in 10 years of patient care, and it always seemed to fit the situation. It also allows the person to elaborate their issues to you and continue the conversation.
  7. by   tx2007
    Thanks Jami RN that is a good saying I will have to "borrow" that one!!
  8. by   luvltc
    I agree with suzanne4, sometimes just holding a hand makes all the difference in the world. Sounds like you are very kind and compassionate. Keep it up. :icon_hug:
  9. by   HeartsOpenWide
    I ask them if I can give them a hug. Human touch is amazing, even if it is just hugging some one and rubbing their back for a min.
  10. by   belfry
    What I always do is stop whatever else I am doing, sit down and give the person my full attention, and say, "Tell me about it." Often what they are struggling with in the situation is not what we might imagine, so sitting with the person, giving open ended responses, and not ever ever saying, "I know how you feel" will almost always be the right thing to do, which is make them feel heard and validated.
  11. by   tx2007
    Quote from belfry
    What I always do is stop whatever else I am doing, sit down and give the person my full attention, and say, "Tell me about it." Often what they are struggling with in the situation is not what we might imagine, so sitting with the person, giving open ended responses, and not ever ever saying, "I know how you feel" will almost always be the right thing to do, which is make them feel heard and validated.

    Thanks so much everyone for the great advice I am going to try those next time I am in clinicals
  12. by   Lisa CCU RN
    Yeah, I was always toldto validate people's feelings. If they were crying, don't tell them not to and don't say it will be alright. it's like saying they shouldn't be sad. People are supposed to grieve, it's a natural process. I would just tell them I'm sorry for your loss and ask them if they'd like to talk about it. If you are too busy to sit with them right then, give them a time when you are not busy and make sure you go back. And like the others said, a hug is always good. Be sure to ask if it's ok first though.
  13. by   Daytonite
    I would give her a hug (if she seems receptive to that) and say "I am so sorry," and wait for her to make the next statement.
  14. by   grinnurse
    So far that has happened only 2 times. Each time I said something like this "You look like you could use a hug" and then go from there. Sometimes the pt or family member will want to talk and others, like someone else said was the human touch that they needed.

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