What can I do to relieve stress from being a new nurse?

ixchel · Apr 2, 2015

Love, absolutely EVERYTHING you are feeling right now is completely normal, expected, and okay. I finally shook the "this is the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life" feeling somewhat recently. But the mountains I climbed to get there.... My goodness. Stress crying, mean meltdowns at home, starting an antidepressant (yes, that happened), and just really going through an ugly, dark period, have all been the cumulative theme of my first year in nursing.

But.....

One day really soon, you are going to have a tiny little victory. That tiny little victory will be huge to you because it will be YOUR victory. Then shortly after that, you will feel a groove. You'll know this isn't so bad. Every day you'll remind yourself - I can't get good at this until I get good at this. You'll think you're ridiculous for thinking that, but you'll realize that truly the more practice you get, the better you'll get. Then one shift, you'll be caught up on everything. You'll actually feel like you might have a smooth day. (But you will NEVER, EVER say that out loud.) It'll take awhile before that whole "I'm actually caught up on my work" feeling feels okay because until it does feel okay, you'll feel certain you're forgetting something. You'll realize you know stuff. You'll feel safer. You won't be as terrified that something might go wrong. You'll respond without hesitation when someone calls out, "nurse!" One day a new grad will begin orienting to your facility. And suddenly you'll realize you've accumulated enough knowledge that you can help them.

And all of that will happen your first year. Believe in it. Know it to be true. I promise you with all my heart it is. I finish my first year in two months, and as much of a spazz as I was in my first months, as terrible as it all made me feel, I know I have so much more to learn, but I'm happy now. I'm cautiously comfortable, and that is a fantastic place to be.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Apr 3, 2015

Hello everyone,
I was hoping you guys can help with my stress as a new nurse. How did you guys survived when you first started working?. Any tips or feedback will help. I just feel that being a new nurse is extremely stressful. To me nursing school was not that hard but being a new nurse is the hardest thing I have ever done and I want to conquer it. I want to be my best and feel happy to go to work. Honestly speaking I feel nursing school does not prepares us for the real world job. Currently I am working in a nursing home PRN in the weekend only as I am still going to school for my RN. I feel that nursing home is not for me. Is this ok to feel this way? I can't wait to finish my RN and get a job in the hospital that I have been doing my clinical. I have a great chance of getting a job there as I have done extra clinical hours to get my LVN license while I am in the RN program. So do you guys think its ok for me to think that nursing home is just not for me?? Can it be possible that hospital is better for me? I feel very depressed while working there because I have only two other nurse working with me in the weekend and no supervisor or charge nurse, just the three of us. I love the hospital when I go for my clinical. I like the environment how there are more nurses, charge nurse, and other staff members. It is a different environment than the nursing home which I like, a more cheerful environment. Also I would love feedback on how to survive being a new nurse. Thanks to everyone for support. I love this website and so glad I found it!

The first year is rough, and the only way to GET through it is to GO through it. That means staying at your first job for a year or so -- until you become competent -- even if you're really, really sure that some other job would be perfect for you. It's OK to wonder if the nursing home is really your thing, to doubt that it's really your thing -- but understand that you won't KNOW until you become competent. It's pretty normal to hate your job until you do become competent. I cried all the way to work, all the way home from work and sometimes in the bathroom AT work. That's normal, too.

The way to survive is to take care of yourself first. Go to the bathroom, drink water, take a lunch break. There's a reason the fight attendants tell you to put your own oxygen on before you turn to help someone else with theirs -- or have you ever listened to that spiel?

Different folks have different ways of coping with stress, but try to cope without alcohol, pain killers or street corner pharmaceuticals. Shopping helps some, but buying will just get you into trouble and increase your debt. Venting to a friend works, but try not to choose a "work friend" as that can come back and bite you in the place where you sit. Exercise works -- I used to walk my dogs every night after work, and the more stressful the day the farther we walked. Normal was two miles, a bad day could mean eight. When my knees went, I found that journalling helped as well. If you just sit in front of a blank piece of paper (or a computer screen) and write for 20 minutes, the thing that is truly bothering you will emerge. It may not be what you thought it was. Swimming -- pretty much confined to pool hours or summer, though. A friend finds that driving helps. Just make sure you don't drive so far that you can't come back in time to work your next shift. (She once drove a few hundred miles after an especially awful shift.)

fbhopern · Apr 3, 2015

Thank you ixchel. I just can't wait for that day of victory when I feel that I have enough knowledge to help a new oriented. Since I have started my job I thought to myself that if there is ever a new oriented in my unit, I will help her/him with my heart and soul because I know what that person is going through. And that is reason I am here because only you guys will understand my pain and what I am going through. No matter what I tell my husband or my sisters, I don't think they will understand me like you guys. So thank you so much. I love you guys all. Nursing is a great profession. I love what I do so I want to continue it no matter how much it is hurting me now. As I said earlier I am a PRN nurse for the weekend. So whenever they call me to work that following week, the two days before my work I can't enjoy anything. Every moment I think to myself "oh I have to work this weekend." and is this weird feeling in my stomach drive me crazy. No matter how much I try to stop thinking about it, it won't stop. But I think I am able to stop myself a little now. And you reply truly helping me.thanks.

fbhopern · Apr 3, 2015

The first year is rough, and the only way to GET through it is to GO through it. That means staying at your first job for a year or so -- until you become competent -- even if you're really, really sure that some other job would be perfect for you. It's OK to wonder if the nursing home is really your thing, to doubt that it's really your thing -- but understand that you won't KNOW until you become competent. It's pretty normal to hate your job until you do become competent. I cried all the way to work, all the way home from work and sometimes in the bathroom AT work. That's normal, too.
The way to survive is to take care of yourself first. Go to the bathroom, drink water, take a lunch break. There's a reason the fight attendants tell you to put your own oxygen on before you turn to help someone else with theirs -- or have you ever listened to that spiel?
Different folks have different ways of coping with stress, but try to cope without alcohol, pain killers or street corner pharmaceuticals. Shopping helps some, but buying will just get you into trouble and increase your debt. Venting to a friend works, but try not to choose a "work friend" as that can come back and bite you in the place where you sit. Exercise works -- I used to walk my dogs every night after work, and the more stressful the day the farther we walked. Normal was two miles, a bad day could mean eight. When my knees went, I found that journalling helped as well. If you just sit in front of a blank piece of paper (or a computer screen) and write for 20 minutes, the thing that is truly bothering you will emerge. It may not be what you thought it was. Swimming -- pretty much confined to pool hours or summer, though. A friend finds that driving helps. Just make sure you don't drive so far that you can't come back in time to work your next shift. (She once drove a few hundred miles after an especially awful shift.)

Hello Ruby,

I thought that nursing home is not for me because I never liked nursing home. Only reason I applied to the nursing home because the hospital I want to work does not hire LVNs. I am in the RN program and did extra clinical hours in the summer just to get my LVN license and start gaining experience. And I am so glad I did that. This is truly a experience but from the beginning I never wanted to work in nursing home. I just love the feel of the hospital environment. Also I would rather have 6-7 patients rather than having 20 patients. And I am not saying that hospital nursing is any easier. I know it is busy in the hospital too. Even me as a student during my clinical is very busy. But I would rather be busy with less patients and I feel I will learn a lot more in the hospital. Just really hoping I will be able to get in the residency program which they only talk 10 new grads.

Thank you for giving me all these options to relieve my stress. I love writing. So thank you so much for replying to me. It really makes me feel that someone is listening to me and understands me. Thank you. We new nurses would not be able to survive without you guys. I love you guys. Oh my God. yes really I am saying this I love you guys..You know why? because you guys are helping me to go through the toughest thing I have ever done. And that could be the simplest reason to love someone.

anon456, BSN, RN · Apr 3, 2015

If you are overwhelmed by all the things you need to know at work, create your own reference book. Get a small notebook and keep it in your pocket. Write down all the specific things you learn each day that you might need to know again later.

ixchel · Apr 3, 2015

Hello Ruby,
I thought that nursing home is not for me because I never liked nursing home. Only reason I applied to the nursing home because the hospital I want to work does not hire LVNs. I am in the RN program and did extra clinical hours in the summer just to get my LVN license and start gaining experience. And I am so glad I did that. This is truly a experience but from the beginning I never wanted to work in nursing home. I just love the feel of the hospital environment. Also I would rather have 6-7 patients rather than having 20 patients. And I am not saying that hospital nursing is any easier. I know it is busy in the hospital too. Even me as a student during my clinical is very busy. But I would rather be busy with less patients and I feel I will learn a lot more in the hospital. Just really hoping I will be able to get in the residency program which they only talk 10 new grads.
Thank you for giving me all these options to relieve my stress. I love writing. So thank you so much for replying to me. It really makes me feel that someone is listening to me and understands me. Thank you. We new nurses would not be able to survive without you guys. I love you guys. Oh my God. yes really I am saying this I love you guys..You know why? because you guys are helping me to go through the toughest thing I have ever done. And that could be the simplest reason to love someone.

If you love writing and you feel it gives you some level of catharsis, go get a journal. Pour your heart into it. Then close it, and go about life. Best wishes to you, and know that every single nurse goes through this first year hell. We're here for you!

Farawyn · Apr 3, 2015

I cried a lot, talked to my friends and gained 15 pounds. Then I forced myself to start moving, started thinking about what I did each day that was right, started to think about what I learned each day- and you do, you learn something every day.

That competent nurse you admire? She/he felt the same way you did once, too.

orangepink, NP · Apr 3, 2015

[h=1]What can I do to relieve stress from being a new nurse?[/h]

go shopping! :-)

fbhopern · Apr 3, 2015

If you love writing and you feel it gives you some level of catharsis, go get a journal. Pour your heart into it. Then close it, and go about life. Best wishes to you, and know that every single nurse goes through this first year hell. We're here for you!

Hey thanks for the idea. I just told my sister that we are going out tomorrow after I get back from work. And I will definitely buy a dairy tomorrow. For the first time I am not feeling as bad as I usually feel the day before my work. Thank you for assuring that everyone go through this. Even though I knew it, it feels better to hear from you.

fbhopern · Apr 3, 2015

If you are overwhelmed by all the things you need to know at work, create your own reference book. Get a small notebook and keep it in your pocket. Write down all the specific things you learn each day that you might need to know again later.

I like this idea. I have decided to by a diary. So tomorrow after work I will go to buy one. Maybe I will not use the dairy for my current job because currently I really don't work much in here since I am only PRN for the weekends. So some weekends I work some I don't. Some weeks I only work the Saturday or Sunday. But I am buying a diary anyways because I will definitely use it for my hospital job which I will apply for end of this month. I hope I get in as they only take 10 new grads. Thank you for your great idea. This will help me to learn faster.

anon456, BSN, RN · Apr 4, 2015

I like this idea. I have decided to by a diary. So tomorrow after work I will go to buy one. Maybe I will not use the dairy for my current job because currently I really don't work much in here since I am only PRN for the weekends. So some weekends I work some I don't. Some weeks I only work the Saturday or Sunday. But I am buying a diary anyways because I will definitely use it for my hospital job which I will apply for end of this month. I hope I get in as they only take 10 new grads. Thank you for your great idea. This will help me to learn faster.

I'm glad you like that idea, and I hope you get the job you applied for!