Woman Calls C-Section "Rape"

Published

http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/10/05/woman-compares-forced-c-section-to-rape/?icid=main|aim|dl6|link4|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lemondrop.com%2F2009%2F10%2F05%2Fwoman-compares-forced-c-section-to-rape%2F

My mother gave birth to me via emergency C-section after 18 intense hours of labor (it took the doctors that long to realize my mom's hips were too narrow for giving birth), when her (and my) vitals began to tank. My younger sister was a planned C-section, both because of hospital policy (not allowing lady partsl births after a C-section) and because there was almost no chance my mom could give birth to her lady partslly, even if she had wanted to.

On the other hand, my sister-in-law had a C-section with my nephew, because he had been diagnosed with gastroschisis. But four years later, she lady partslly gave birth to my beautiful niece, with no problems whatsoever. As you can see, the hospital had no such policy about the C-Sections.

Whether or not someone wants a C-Section, that can be left to debate. That is not the issue I found in this article. The issue I found is that someone compared a C-Section to rape! How on Earth can you justify something like that? I understand that some women feel incredibly disappointed that their wishes aren't being taken into consideration, but the fact of the matter is that hospitals have these policies for a reason. Yes, part of it is to cover their own tails and prevent lawsuits, but why would there be lawsuits in the first place? Risks and/or harm to the patient? Gee, there's a thought. Rape is an act of violence, and of dominating power over your victim. How is that in any way comparable?

My personal opinion... Yes, when I do have children, I would like to give birth lady partslly. But if I ever find myself in a place where my medical staff are telling me that I need to have a C-Section, do it! Anything to keep my baby and I safe (in that order, for me at least).

Anyone else think that this woman is far out of reach in her logic? Or do you think she's on to something?

Specializes in Gerontology, nursing education.
This women is blatantly insulting rape victims and that's what ****** me off the most. I know several women/girls who were sexually assaulted or abused.

No one is FORCING her to get a C-section! She's entitled to take her saggy butt to another hospital. This woman deeply disgusts me and I hold no pity for her.

I have been sexually assaulted and abused as well and I do not feel disgust for this woman, only compassion. I commend you for caring about the women and girls you know who have suffered abuse and assault. It is important that men are advocates in changing attitudes and preventing assault and abuse from happening.

However, I am concerned about the judgmental statements you have made about this woman, not only in this post but in others. Why the vitriol? I mean, you disagree with her statements---and that's your right. But your comments make me wonder if you would have a difficult time caring for a patient such as this woman as a nurse. What if you were a student doing clinicals and you were assigned to her care? What if you were working in ICU and she became your patient because something had gone wrong with the birth? You can't just refuse an assignment because the patient "deeply disgusts" you.

Please understand, I am not trying to attack you here. As a nurse, regardless of what educational or professional level you ultimately achieve, you will be working with people who make bad decisions, who have different values, who have different life experiences and perceptions. I think the sooner you understand this, the better equipped you will be for success in a nursing career.

ETA: Yeah, you can be forced into a medical procedure you don't want. Do check out the threads about health care workers being forced into having H1N1 vaccinations. Regardless of how one feels about the safety of the H1N1 vaccine, it's still sobering to think that there are states who wish to mandate health care workers being vaccinated against their wishes, facilities that threaten to fire those who aren't vaccinated and opinion polls that show a wide majority of the general public thinking that it's okay to mandate vaccinations for health care workers. The patients' rights today, the nurses' rights tomorrow. Very troubling indeed.

Specializes in Gerontology, nursing education.
Nope. Not turning into an abortion debate. I'm as pro-life as a they come but I believe that you must take into account mom and baby's life when it comes to delivery. One does not trump the other. You must act in both of their best interests and mom has a right to decide about her delivery. This mom has a proven scar and a proven pelvis. She is a perfect candidate for VBAC. Why should she have to travel hours for a VBAC??? She has 3 other children to care for. I don't know about AZ but my state has laws against midwives attending homebirth VBACs. Why is the right to birth lady partslly (when one can safely birth lady partslly) even an issue.

Excellent point. I don't see why this should be an issue except that someone other than the woman is trying to have control over her body.

Communication between her and her physician has been so damaged, though, that regardless of what ultimately happens, there may be a lawsuit, even if there's a good outcome for the baby. It sounds like a mess for everyone involved and a no-win situation.

I did actually talk with a woman who had been raped and who had undergone a c-section. She thought her c-section was worse than the rape. Why? Because after she was raped, people validated her feelings and allowed her to expressed her fear, anger, sadness, etc. After her c-section, people told her just to be grateful she and the baby were okay. She wound up traveling down to the Farm in TN to VBAC.

My experience was different. My second child was born via C-section and it did not have any lasting psychosocial sequelae. My first child was a mid-forceps delivery and I wish I could have had an emergency C-section. Surprisingly, I am still a bit irritated over the experience of his birth, especially considering that I still have gyno issues over twenty years later related to the delivery. I did not feel violated in either birth experience and for that I feel grateful. It has, however, taken me years to deal with the violation I felt due to sexual assault. I don't feel that anyone has the capability to judge whether or not I have the "right" to still feel injured. These are my feelings and my experiences and if anyone tries to tell me otherwise, he or she should not be in charge of my care.

When I was in labor with my 1st baby, my nurses asked me to rate my pain on a scale of 1-10. I was writhing in pain on the bed with no epidural and pitocen shooting through my veins. I said 9. She looked at me in disgust and said, "10 is gunshot wound. What is your pain really?" I never felt so defeated in my life. When I expressed my doubts in getting through childbirth, she simply flipped her hand and said, "Women have been doing this for millions of years."

This is outrageous. :angryfire I am so sorry that this happened to you. "What is your pain really?" I'm sorry but a nurse who gets to that point that he/she cannot show compassion is someone who needs a break---if not a complete career change.

I decided to go into nursing after that in order to advocate for patients in the way that my nurse didn't advocate or support me. Sadly, I'm seeing my L&D nurse in many of the responses here. I guess we are so used to women not caring (or expressing disconnect) about their birth experience that we think all women do/should feel the same. :(

I applaud you for using your negative experiences as a catalyst to make a difference. :yeah: You sound like a very compassionate nurse and I'd be proud to have you as my co-worker or student---thrilled to have you for my nurse!

Specializes in Med/Surg, Surgery, Post Partum, GYN.

A lot of small or rural hospitals don't allow VBACS not because they cannot handle an emergency, but because their OR is not staffed in-house 24 hours a day. They may leave at 3:30 and then the call team covers until 7 am. If a VBAC were permitted, the entire OR crew would have to remain in-house until after the woman delivered...we all know how administration feels about paying for unproductive time. Not saying this is the situation in this particular case, just a possibility.

From a personal standpoint of having undergone two lady partsl deliveries and one c-section for a breech presentation, I can sympathize with the feelings of disappointment, anger, and loss of control when the birth does not turn out the way one has expected. I was even more disappointed when my fellow nursing co-workers said "well, it's your own fault you had to have the c-section - just get over it already." My fault that my baby turned back into a breech presentation? How about shock as I labored away and after my water broke and my OBGYN was checking me, he kept reaching and reaching until I thought I was going to come off of the bed...I knew immediately that he was going to say "c-section" and I just sat there and cried and then asked for a "do-over."

Specializes in Ante-Intra-Postpartum, Post Gyne.
Here's a genius solution: Nurse midwife can help her give birth at home OR she can take her saggy butt to a different hospital instead of acting like a spoiled brat screaming for a toy.

This women is blatantly insulting rape victims and that's what ****** me off the most. I know several women/girls who were sexually assaulted or abused.

No one is FORCING her to get a C-section! She's entitled to take her saggy butt to another hospital. This woman deeply disgusts me and I hold no pity for her.

Enough with the Saggy Butt crap. Your a pre-nursing student...I PRAY you get into a nursing program that teaches you compassion and empathy; if it a concept you are able to grasp. You may not hold pity for her but I hold pity for your future patients.

I am a rape victim and I am not insulted by this woman's claims. Not everyone is entitled to go to another hospital. There are only three hospitals in my area and the next closest hospital is well over 100 miles away; and the number of hospitals where VBACs are "allowed" are slim and far and few in-between; all over the country. What this woman is complaining about is very valid; there are entire national clubs and many books written because of women that feel violated because of c-sections and other things done to their bodies simply because they are women.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

She needs some serious counseling in my humble opinion. I won't debate her right to her opinion but anyone who seriously believes she was raped needs some help for what can be real PTSD or other psychological disorders and symptoms that can seriously and dangerously impact her ability to parent her child and live out a healthy and full life.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

PS: it angers me that hospitals don't "allow" TOLAC and VBAC simply due to risk mgt, insurance and lack of 24/7 anesthesia coverage and other issues. Forcing otherwise good candidates to undergo major surgery to have their babies to me, is criminal. Enough from me.

PS: it angers me that hospitals don't "allow" TOLAC and VBAC simply due to risk mgt, insurance and lack of 24/7 anesthesia coverage and other issues. Forcing otherwise good candidates to undergo major surgery to have their babies to me, is criminal. Enough from me.

Then again, if the costs of keeping staff in the OR "just in case" can be enough to make it unprofitable to have an L&D unit. In these outlying areas, is it better to have someplace to be able to give birth at all, or should EVERYONE giving birth have to drive a long way? (As long as hospitals have to make a profit or at least not lose money to stay in business, this is going to be an issue.)

It sucks for those that want to VBAC, but should all women giving birth (including them) have to drive hours?

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

You don't have to keep staff IN HOUSE for this. You CAN keep staff immediately available, meaning within 10-15 minutes, like we do and still qualify for allowing TOLAC. This is not only feasible, but should be standard everywhere. It comes down to choice on the parts of hospital administration, anesthesia providers and OB doctors, honestly.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/10/15/hospitals.ban.vbacs/index.html

Here is the link to the CNN story mentioned above. Makes you think. NO ONE should be forced to make such a drastic decision as this family is doing. We see women travel in excess of two hours to our hospital to do this, I know. Crazy IMO.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

Recommendations from Lamaze International regarding safe TOLAC/VBAC:

http://www.lamaze.org/ChildbirthProfessionals/ResourcesforProfessionals/CarePracticePapers/tabid/90/Default.aspx

When will we practice EB nursing and medicine? Perhaps when tort and insurance reform begin in earnest.

Our own critical thinking skills demand this: we quit laughing at and deriding this woman's opinion and think really about what she is feeling.....it's easy to make fun and much harder really to think about what our role is in making people feel threatened in the the hospital environment.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
Here's a genius solution: Nurse midwife can help her give birth at home OR she can take her saggy butt to a different hospital instead of acting like a spoiled brat screaming for a toy.

case in point.

I had a very un-wanted (and un-needed IMO) C-section.

I felt like a rape victim afterwards. I have PTSD because of the c-section. I have been in therapy since my daughter was a newborn. She is now 2.5 years old. I have had treatment for PTSD (EMDR) and countless hours of talk therapy.

I AM a rape victim----and this c-section was WORSE for me.

I have hated--HATED--medical professionals all of my life. I was sexually abused as a young child. Docs and nurses held me down butt naked while I kicked and screamed to examine me. The sexual abuse was NOTHING compared to what the medical pro's did to me.

Raped again at 15. I didn't want to report it because of the medical aspect of it. Long story short, my mother tricked me into getting it done (I was in psych ward because of attemped suicide after the rape. They promised I could leave if I got rape kit done....but they lied). The doc--and the nurse--were awful. The male doc yelled at me. THAT, again, was worse than the attack.

I avoided invasive medical stuff for 10 years----until the birth of my daughter.

I planned an UNASSISTED home water birth. Later, I found a lay-midwife to assist me at my home. Long story short, I made the mistake of continuing to see my OB (who NEVER, EVER saw me undressed). The OB "scared" me into a c-section. He didn't "force" me....he just scared me enough.

2.5 years later, I still have flashbacks and nightmares. I can't even look at my daughter's belly button without having ill feelings over her birth. So many, many problems because of the way medical pro's have treated me.

As I sit here today, I swear, I would rather die than have any invasive treatments. A life saving surgery would equal a foley cath. I'd rather die, at this point........ My next child WILL be born at home, as I will NOT have ANY medical treatment during my next pregnancy. I will hire a lay-midwife and rely on my instincts and stay far, far away from any OB office...............

I'm a christian and God spoke to me a few months ago. I believe that nursing is now my calling. I want to be a nurse who comforts scared children/people. A nurse who makes scared paitents feel like a person---instead of a piece of dirt that I have always felt like. And I will never forget the reason I became a nurse. It will never be "about the money".....it will always be to stop the vicious cycle of abuse. Apparently, the docs/nurses in my youth had no clue the toll their bedside manner had on me----and countless others, I'm sure.

I'm terrified of OB clinicals. My flashbacks will be strong during that rotation--if not unbearable. I'm hoping that OB clinicals don't come for a very long time, as I still have a lot of PTSD treatment and counseling to do.

For anyone who wasn't able to understand how anyone could equate a c-section with rape, maybe you have a better understanding now.

In my mothering group, many women feel that a c-section is like rape (lady partsl births are worse, depending on the treatment she has received). Most of the women who feel like that are SA survivors. Pregnancy/child birth can be VERY hard on a SA survivor. Please, keep that in mind if you ever come across a pt with similiar feelings as the woman in the article and me.

+ Join the Discussion