Will I be able to live my life as a nurse?

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Hi all! I just happened to stumble onto this site and it has been a godsend so far! After lurking for a day I decided to sign up and start posting.

My background/story: I am 24 years old, and currently living in Texas. Originally from MA.

I have had a LOT of stress/upheaval in my life in the last two years since I moved to TX. After graduating from Umass Amherst with a journalism degree (which, unfortunately, seems to be flushola now since I don't want to be a journalist), I moved down to TX. I've had to deal with the constant stress of culture shock (I do not identify AT ALL with the average Texan), my first real job (backstabbings, ****** boss, having to prove myself a few times to my coworkers, earning my first raise), my first apartment, my first new area/state, and my first real relationship. Add to this some oily black depression and teeth-rattlingy good panic attacks which I've had to white knuckle at work and in my personal life as well (thankfully therapy has helped TREMENDOUSLY). I still haven't made any friends here in TX and this DFW area is a toxic bore to a Yankee like me used to the intensity and stimulation of the Boston area.

And into all of this stress I'll add my fairly recent decision to try my hand at nursing. I'll admit I don't think nursing is my "calling," (I'm a thorough believer that it is a luxury to find a job you believe is your calling. I second Studs Terkel's affirmation of "that's why they call it work.") but I'll settle for "sustainable job" I guess. My friend is currently in a nursing program for the same reason as me: he too was embittered with his useless journalism degree and was tired of working barfbag unskilled jobs and out of desperation flung himself into nursing. Both of us are far from quixotic about nursing. I started taking prerequisite classes last January and have since completed a Chem course and a Math class. The schedule of working and studying sometimes had me pulling 16hr days 4 times a week.

*My question is: I don't know if I have the emotional fuel to keep on this nursing track after all this special joy of panic attacks and stress. I still have the bulk of my prereqs to take (Anatomy and Physiology, Microbio, Human Development, etc) and then obviously nursing school. Thankfully, I do plan to quit work to study full time next semester (that WILL reduce my stress markedly as I have a visceral hatred for my current job and its atmosphere of maudlin imbecility). But beyond that, I'm mostly worried if I can hack it as a nurse. I've read a fair amount of posts here from nurses who seem to paint a picture of nursing as a pantagruelian daily task sopped with bodily fluids, ****** patients in varying stages of death and tyrannical management and understaffing that would provide most muckraking journalists with a full three course meal with extra wheat germ. I just don't know if I could handle that kind of wear and tear on the old corpse and coconut, considering I have anxiety issues (although I will say I don't consider myself particularly squeamish). **However, I must admit I am excited about the material I will be learning in the classes and find biology and science entirely fascinating.

But maybe I'm wrong? Perhaps I could tough out my first year in a hospital setting and then branch off into a special field like a medical librarian? I'd like to be a librarian but from my research it seems like a solitary MLS degree is another bucket of sand. Or perhaps it's not ALL that bad and it just depends what hospital you end up in. I mean, I could definitely see myself as a nurse at a gp's practice or something, but the "adrenaline junkie" aura of hospital nursing does NOT appeal to me. I tend to be a quiet, thoughtful person who appreciates his free time in which I'm watching a good film, reading a good book, or listening to a good album. I'm also the kind of person who fails to see the current American wisdom in doing 10,000 things poorly when I could be doing just 10 things well; it seems nursing is all about scatterbrained multi-tasking. I'm just wondering if the $ is worth it if it leaves me totally wiped emotionally and physically on my days off. I'd rather work to live, not live to work, to be pithy.

Thanks for any advice/info anyone can provide!

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Specializes in Adult Stem Cell/Oncology.

I can definitely relate to your post! I majored in English and Philosophy, and got a job at an ad agency right after graduation....and hated it with a passion. I felt like I was in jail! I only lasted for three months in corporate America....that was plenty for me! After that I worked at a daycare for over a year, and am now working as a nanny and taking my last couple of prerequisites for nursing. I, too, suffer from severe anxiety at times. However, I know I want to be a nurse, so I will just have to conquer the anxiety and find a way to deal with it. I'm sure there are tons of nurses out there who suffer from anxiety and/or depression. From what I hear, it's pretty common.

I would suggest volunteering at a hospital though. I volunteer at two, and it's been wonderful. It's definitely confirmed my desire to become a nurse!

I love your style of writing, by the way! "I have a visceral hatred for my current job and its atmosphere of maudlin imbecility...." LOVE it!!! :chuckle

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Specializes in ER, ICU cath lab, remote med.

Let me ask you this...would you want you taking care of your sick and/or dying loved-one? Because to me, that's essentially what I would hope anyone who considers being a nurse would ask themselves. Yes, you can find areas of nursing that do not fuel your adrenaline or make you run around feeling "scatterbrained". But in my opinion, nurses need two characteristics to not lose their mind in this job...caring and critical thinking. Nursing wasn't a "calling" for me either. I stumbled across healthcare on my road to being an anthropologist. But I've found such fulfillment in what I do. I can't even describe the feeling inside when a family thanks me for being there during a patient's last moments. Or when my patient who was supposed to die is transferred to the floor in stable condition. Or when an MD thanks me for predicting/catching a change in condition or making a suggestion for treating the patient. Those moments make me forget the frustration with short staffing, overwhelming assignments, the poop and puke, the aching back from turning the 350+ pound ventilated patients. For the most part, I like taking care of people and I like using my brain. That's what makes this job bearable.

If you're intersted in science...but not necessarily nursing, couldn't you be some kind of medical-technical writer? Are you worried about making money at writing? Or do you just not enjoy writing anymore?

Oh, and if you're miserable in TX, why not move back to MA? Life is way too stay in an unhappy situation when you have the power to change it!

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Specializes in ER, Rural Nursing, Public Health.

Hi there!

When I first entered nursing I was convinced that it wasn't my calling. I figured that I would give nursing a chance anyway and then decide after a year or two if I would stay with this profession.

Now I have been an RN for nearly 5 years and have worked in 5 different areas - med-surg, ICU, ER, rural and now public health. This is my message to you - nursing has SO MANY different areas, that chances are you will find one you like! You can go conventional (hospitals/ clinics) to adventurous (prisons/ rural outposts).

The only area I truly LOVED was rural nursing, but after gathering 500 hours of overtime last year I had to say enough. This is where I felt like a true nurse - being the only RN (with one LVN) in a busy facility. Making critical decisions during each shift, to even running codes by myself. Now I am doing public health on a aboriginal reserve up north and love it (love the 8 hour days)! I never saw myself being in this area, but I wanted a happier work environment, nicer coworkers and decent hours.

I just want to tell you that each nursing job is so different..... but that's the beauty. Who says you have to work to work in a hospital? There are some really adventurous jobs out there! Go to Alaska - go work on a reserve in Arizona - work with women inmates - work as a sexual health nurse - be a mental health worker... and so on. The possibilities are endless!

You will find your niche and therefore be at peace with nursing. Go for it girl - I can honestly say it is worth the adventure!

Good Luck!

Camel

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I wish I knew what career you should pursue. It's good you realize you enjoy writing. You remind me of Dave Barry and Erma Bombeck. All I can say is I hope you find your path and some happiness.

You have had a lot of "firsts" recently, as you know, and it's not easy dealing with all of that. I will pray for God's guidance in your life.

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Hi,

I am a nurse from New England also lived in the south, but have been a nurse for almost ten years and in multiple health care settings from hospital to nursing home. However I feel that the best thing to do if you are unsure of nursing is like what one of the other nurses said "volunteer in a hospital or healthcare setting" etc. This is probably the best wayt to get a real feel for what you will be doing as a nurse, other than if you became a CNA/LNA or Nurse tech I think. Nurses are very intelligent and caring, I think alot of people do not realize just how intelligent nurses and their support staff are. However, this is the field of caring and empathy, and I think you have to be able to critically think and empathize with all walks of life on a daily basis and truly care about people to survive in this field. (and manage stress definately also) I would definately look into volunteering at a hospital or some hospitals have programs where they let people interested in nursing to shadow nurses on floors & units. Best of Luck to you! :mad:

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You graduated with a degree, now what to do with the rest of your life? Most of the students in my nursing school had a college degree but no marketable skills; it is a common problem.

You seem to have a pretty negative view of nursing.

Make a project to get educated about jobs in the healthcare field. Many people go to community college for these jobs. Nursing is just one of them. We are aided and abbeted by physical therapists, lab techs, respiratory therapists, child life specialists, radiology techs and many more.

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Specializes in ICU.

your background in writing will certainly help in the descriptive areas of charting. you can do anything you choose to. it's a matter of how adaptable you are to the circumstances. nursing provides a great variety of areas to choose from. :typing

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Just wanted to say hi to a fellow New Englander! I'm also here in Texas and grew up in Amherst! If I had stayed, I most likely would have gone to Umass. I know what you mean about culture shock. I've been in Texas 6 years, but still itch to go back to Ma.

I cant give you much advice about nursing. I actually feel the same way you do about not being an adrenaline junkie. I've been working on a med/surg floor for over a year, and I still get anxious going into work. I may try a different area of nursing before I throw in the towel. I'm a LVN, so I dont have as much to lose if I get out of nursing. However, only time will tell. My advice would be to see if you could shadow a nurse for a day, or do some kind of observation to see what a nurses typical day is like. I think this may give you a better understanding of what you want.

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First of all, welcome to allnurses. Secondly, I don't see why you couldn't have a life as a nurse. Only you can control that. Some things that come along with nursing are out of our control, but if you allow things to get you down and stress you out to the point where you cannot enjoy life, then nursing isn't for you because you'll never be happy. I wish you all the best in you decision. After all, the final say so is yours....

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Specializes in RN, BSN, CHDN.

Sometimes I find it a little difficult to understand why so many nurses just drift into the profession, and they stay there doing an excellent job.

Nursing for me has been a passion for almost 20years, it has been a rollercoaster of a life which has given me more ups than downs. But there has been times when i have questioned my sanity for remaining in a job as hard work as nursing can be both emotionally and physically. Then I nurse a patient who is so sick and needs me to do so much and I realise again why I am a nurse.

I find the main problem of nursing is not the job itself it is the contribution to the job of some other healthcare professionals, their negitivity, critism, their laziness, their inability to see the whole picture, the constant moaning and complaining.

So in answer to your question can you nurse yep can you deal with the negativity only you will know the answer

And to those who didnt feel a calling well I admire and respect you all because at least you probably went into the profession with your eyes wide open.

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Thanks for the outpouring of advice so far everyone! This is indeed a great community:bow:

I second the idea of med tech careers, be it radiology, lab tech or such. One of the advantages I have in my current situation is I've only taken chemistry so far for my nursing prerequisites, and I'll be taking A/P, microbio, and a human development class next semester which I think could be helpful in most health careers, be it nursing, radiology, lab tech, etc...

I've been particularly interested in radiology for awhile, including CT scans and MRI. However, I was somewhat scared off this path by fellow students and advisers who said the programs (let alone classes) were very competitive to get into.

*And another question: after doing a cursory search for radiology programs online, I saw a lot of results from the "dummy" schools that are unaccredited (university of phoenix online and the like). Can anyone recommend some good radiology programs? Preferably in the Northeast? Is there such a thing as an accelerated second bachelor's program for Radiology and med tech careers? I'd like to get some use out of my previous bachelor's. *Also, would I need a bachelor's in this field to make decent money (by that I mean, able to have my own small apartment in a city like Boston?). I see you can also get certificates in Radiology as well...

Thanks again!

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