Why do nurses do this?!?!?????

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Specializes in Med/Surg, Oncology, Tele, ICU.

i've been off orientation for about 9 months now and it just seems like all that ever gets back to my manager about me is the negative stuff. it's really starting to **** me off because i may not be a great critical care nurse yet, but i've done some good things too!

i have family members and patients tell me how nice it's been to have me as their nurse, i've always been on time, i'm always willing to help someone else out if i'm not doing anything, etc, etc. it's just so frustrating that the couple things i've done that are negative are outweighing the good by so much!

for example, there's this one nurse i was with during orientation and i didn't have the labels with me when i went in to draw a patients' stat labs, they were right outside the door and after i was done, i got them, checked them with the patient, and i sent them. she was sooooooooo aloof and said that i shouldn't have done that (i know), that i was a critical care nurse now and should start thinking like one. just the way she said it was so annoying....anyhoo, not a week later, i see her doing the same thing with a patient who just had routine labs to be drawn!! i felt like saying something, but i didn't cause i didn't want to give her another reason to not like me.

i just wish that all the criticism was constructive and that it was balanced with some good cause that would really help my morale!

thanks for letting me vent.

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I understand what you are saying. I'm still on orientation in the ICU, and I ask my preceptor at the end of each shift for both positive and constructive feedback. With the constructive feedback, I will make it a goal for the next shift to improve on. So far, it's been working.

I don't think it's right to just give all constructive feedback without any positive feedback. And for the nurse to do the SAME thing she told you not to do is showing she was just nickpicking for something "constructive" to give to you. It sounds like she is someone who likes to point out others mistakes to make herself look better.

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Specializes in Critical Care.

>>i've been off orientation for about 9 months now and it just seems like all that ever gets back to my manager about me is the negative stuff.

>snip

>>i didn't have the labels with me when i went in to draw a patients' stat labs, they were right outside the door and after i was done, i got them, checked them with the patient, and i sent them.

are you saying that this was actually reported to your nurse manager?

now that's just silly.

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I started out as a new grad in the ICU, and I now have a full year under my belt, precept, and am studying for my CCRN:loveya: You can call these nurses venomous snakes that eat their young! What is sad is that you could be super nurse and they will still bring you down. I worked with a couple of these nurses and the only cure is to speak up and put them in their place. Their is no room to nit pick in the ICU. If you leaving labels outside a pt's room was such a big deal all she would of had to have NICELY said that it is important to make sure you have the right pt for the right lab draw, which it sounds like you verified anyways. She is just using you to make her kahunays bigger! So next time you see her being hypocritical you can put her in her place. Anyways tho, when I precept I always teach with kindness and encourage my preceptee because that is how great nurses develop! My preceptor once told me, "Never let a nurse make you feel inferior, because they were once in your shoes." If this toxic behavior continues I would think about changing units, because this is not condusive to you as a nurse.

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Some nurses are toxic and will suck the last ounce of life out of you. Others are fabulous colleagues.

You have to learn to not let people suck the life out of you.

Start patting yourself on the back because nobody else will. You'll see that management is typically only worried about what you did wrong and not what you've done well.

Good luck and keep your head up!

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That's life my friend. Your manager will only ever hear the negative but never the positive.

I think in the 5 months I've been in the ICU I've had one positive compliment from management for meeting our sepsis bundle with 100% compliance on a really sick patient I admitted. Everything else they've said to me wasn't because I did something right, but rather something wrong.

Like was mentioned, you have to pat yourself on the back and just tell yourself you're doing a good job. Your superior critical thinking skills are just expected working in the ICU, nobody will carry you around on their shoulders for figuring out something other people missed.

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Specializes in Med/Surg, Oncology, Tele, ICU.

thanks for all the comments....it's just kills me that i let it get to me because that doesn't help me at all. my manager isn't like that at all and most of the other nurses i work with aren't either. i guess i just care too much about the fact that i know that all the nurses talk and they all probably think less of me because of what a few nurses say. i need to get over that, i know. :sniff:

i'm always asking for better ways to do things, cause even if i get the job done, chances are there's a better or more efficient way to do it and i'm all for that! my mom tells me to just remember that those nurses have made mistakes too, but it just irks me that they don't act like it.

i've had students and i go out of my way to never be negative to them. even if they ask something silly, i try to realize that they probably know the answer and they're just spaced out by the new atmosphere and gently correct them. god knows i've done the same thing! :D

anyway, bottom line is, i guess i just need to strap on a pair and try harder in everything as well as not letting certain people get to me. it's something else i need to work on!;)

xoxo

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thanks for all the comments....it's just kills me that i let it get to me because that doesn't help me at all. my manager isn't like that at all and most of the other nurses i work with aren't either. i guess i just care too much about the fact that i know that all the nurses talk and they all probably think less of me because of what a few nurses say. i need to get over that, i know. :sniff:

i'm always asking for better ways to do things, cause even if i get the job done, chances are there's a better or more efficient way to do it and i'm all for that! my mom tells me to just remember that those nurses have made mistakes too, but it just irks me that they don't act like it.

i've had students and i go out of my way to never be negative to them. even if they ask something silly, i try to realize that they probably know the answer and they're just spaced out by the new atmosphere and gently correct them. god knows i've done the same thing! :D

anyway, bottom line is, i guess i just need to strap on a pair and try harder in everything as well as not letting certain people get to me. it's something else i need to work on!;)

xoxo

you sound like a kind person and a caring, conscientious nurse.

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Specializes in Med/Surg, Oncology, Tele, ICU.

i actually met with my boss today and told her a few of my concerns and things i wish would get paid more attention to. i mean, i don't want pats on the back for doing my job, but having good things noticed once-in-a-while would be nice. it was a good meeting though cause my boss is actually really nice and supportive. it's just too bad i don't actually work with her instead of some other people i work with! lol

anyhoo....thanks for all the good words cause they really helped me feel better about things. :loveya:

xoxo

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Specializes in CCRN.

Stay strong and put in the time. I too faced challenges as a new grad in the ICU. That was over 4 years ago, now I have earned the respect of my peers. Believe me, it isn't easily given. A couple of the "seasoned" tough nurses have retired, a couple others now ask me for advice. Pretty cool! Lead by example. If you ever need an attagirl, pm me. ;)

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Specializes in Med/Surg, Oncology, Tele, ICU.

thanks guys....i guess i should've mentioned that i wasn't a new grad when i started in the icu...i had a little over a year of m/s (plus floating to other units) under my belt, so i guess i figured i'd be better at my job as well las the ups and downs of it all. my mistake! :D oh well, you all have made me feel a lot better anyway, so thanks for that:heartbeat

xoxo

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Specializes in ICU/PACU.

It's always the worst feeling when a coworker reports you or sends an email to a manager about something you missed. This happened all the time to me as a new nurse & in this particular unit I worked in. If you missed something silly like forgetting to sign your initials on the MAR or etc... some of the nurses would email the manager & tell her...then the manager would email you. And it felt like that was all the communication I had with my manager (what I was doing wrong). I eventually talked to her about it and she said she agreed & doesn't know why people send her emails all the time..........but she never did anything about it.

Moved on from that unit & now I work in a really well run unit with professional nurses who work together as a team & would never think to report someone. Really, we should all work together and if I miss something during my shift, you shouldn't email the manager..you should help.

Ok the absolute worst experience I had was at a new travel assignment. I get a call the next day during the afternoon (while I was sleeping...I was on nights) from my manager. Apparently the RN I gave report to reported me to the manager for.........not SHAVING my pt, for not emptying the foley bag(she was on a Lasix drip...and sorry..it got full *****), and etc....... all this stupid ****. Really ****** me off.

When management listens to this...they are just as bad as the nurses.

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