When a Baby dies....

Specialties NICU

Published

So i posted that I am going to be a new nursing student in the spring. And I have decided that no matter where nursing school might take me I KNOW I want to end up in the NICU. I think about how nice it will be to know I am giving the best care possible to sick little babies and their families, and how wonderful it will be to know I made a difference in that family when they finally take their baby home from the hospital.

I know though, in the back of my mind that the NICU is a very serious and critical place, and some babies will not make it. I am wondering how you as a NICU nurse handle that? How did you handle it when you lost your first patient?

Also, As that babies nurse, what kind of care are you able to give the baby and family after a death? I know it's sort of a loaded morbid question, but I really want to know. What takes place in the NICU after a baby dies?

Specializes in NICU.
If staffing allows (which is usually rare) and the nurse wants to, we usually let him/her go home once all the work is done. I usually wind up with the end of shift code though. And sometimes, I feel better staying and being around other people who "get it."

Wow. That would never, ever happen here. Send the kid downstairs, get housekeeping up to clean the spot, you're up for the next admit.

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Specializes in NICU.
Wow. That would never, ever happen here. Send the kid downstairs, get housekeeping up to clean the spot, you're up for the next admit.

That would never happen in our unit either. But luckily we're not usually up for next admit ..... gosh that would suck!

We're usually busy with paperwork and other stuff after a demise, so for the rest of the shift we might pick up another assignment or help out here and there, but we're never sent home.

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Specializes in Level III NICU.
That would never happen in our unit either. But luckily we're not usually up for next admit ..... gosh that would suck!

We're usually busy with paperwork and other stuff after a demise, so for the rest of the shift we might pick up another assignment or help out here and there, but we're never sent home.

It has happened maybe once since I've been here (3.5 years).

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Specializes in NICU.

One night the girl next to me got an admit, who died, postmortem care and documentation was done, spot was cleaned, and she got another admit. It was UNbelievable.

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Specializes in Level III NICU.
One night the girl next to me got an admit, who died, postmortem care and documentation was done, spot was cleaned, and she got another admit. It was UNbelievable.

Wow, that really stinks. At least if we can't send the nurse home, we try to give her a nice assignment for the rest of the shift.

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Specializes in NICU.
Wow, that really stinks. At least if we can't send the nurse home, we try to give her a nice assignment for the rest of the shift.

If I remember right, THAT admit died on the same nurse the next night, in fact.

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Specializes in NICU.
One night the girl next to me got an admit, who died, postmortem care and documentation was done, spot was cleaned, and she got another admit. It was UNbelievable.

Oh my gosh, that's HORRIBLE!! Luckily our charges are pretty good and anytime someone has a demise they'll just have them help out here and there like I said, if possible. But when we're busy they just make an assignment from someone else's and then have another person an admit spot. Lucky for us, we usually have 3-4 admit spots available and MOST nights we don't get more than that, although it happens.

One demise right after another, 2 nights in a row ..... yikes!! That's so incredibly draining, I would burn out so fast :o

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Specializes in NICU level III.

when my 1st baby that died i really didn't have to deal with the family much because the mom was in the icu on a vent & the dad lived out of town & couldn't make it to the hospital. family had made up their mind to withdrawal care, which was the best possible choice they could have made for the baby (as cruel as that sounds). the nurses were sure the baby didn't die alone since the family couldn't be there & we did the footprints & handprints for the family. the hardest part was carring the baby down to the morge knowing i was the 1st person to ever hold this precious child. i was fine while i was at work, but once i got home that day i began to cry.

the 2nd death i had, there were probably 10 family members at the bed & we were withdrawal care due to nec. it was the hardest death i think i've ever experienced. and you never get used to a child dieing, they are far too innocent & have so much life left. well we took the baby off the vent & took the baby & all the family to a private room so they could spend the last few moments with the baby taking pictures & just holding the baby. i just cried with the family. thats really all you can do. there's no other way to express how hard it is & i think the families really appreciate seeing the nurses emotions knowing how much we too love their baby.

you just give the family as much time as they need with the baby, start making funeral arrangements if they want the funeral home to come get the baby or if they want to personally take the baby to the funeral home, etc. let them take pictures, & you make them a memory box with a lock of hair if they have enough to take, make handprints & footprints, take anything from their bed you think they would like. we put the arm band in, a blanket, a little stuffed animal, a diaper, pictures we have, & anything else we can think of that we think will be something special to them.

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I think the saddest death I've seen was a baby that was being taken off, the whole family was there including the baby's 8 year old cousin. The whole time the little girl was bawling and saying "no mommy no"

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Specializes in NICU.

I remember a death that was hard on the whole unit.

A 26 weeker who had been alive 5 days but going down hill.

I had the infant the night before he died and it was hard we were doing everything we could possibly think of and I left he was on 100% and his sats were 60's. I thought that was it, I was amazed when I came in the next night to see he was still alive. But that night he died.

His mother was homeless and 18 and had no family. She came and was crying and screaming to help her baby and asking god to save her baby. The baby died after 2 codes and the mom collapsed in the conference room holding him, I will never forget her screams.:crying2::sniff:

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Specializes in NICU.
I will never forget her screams.:crying2::sniff:

That is the worst sound in the world. The screams and cries of a mother that is losing her child. Gives me chills just thinking about it.

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Specializes in NICU.
That is the worst sound in the world. The screams and cries of a mother that is losing her child. Gives me chills just thinking about it.

No kidding

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