What are some of the most ridiculous things patients have asked of you?

Posted
by mother/babyRN mother/babyRN, RN Member Nurse

Specializes in cardiac, diabetes, OB/GYN. Has 27 years experience.

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tattooednursie

tattooednursie, LVN

Specializes in Mostly LTC, some acute and some ER,. 660 Posts

I had a resident ask me to take off all my lothes and lay in his bed. Then he started crying when I said no.

nursejer

nursejer

12 Posts

had a pt once ask me for his "peanut butter balls" told me he gets it every nite. I could not figure out what he was talking about until i read his med list..... Phenobarbitol!!

sherryrn76

sherryrn76

14 Posts

Once had an OB patient's husband call L&D to ask if it was ok to blow into his wife's vagina. we told him not to do that. We couldn't even figure out WHY you'd do that. Also once had a labor patient bring in her mucous plug..in a spoon! yuck!:eek: :D

jennirn

jennirn

4 Posts

Had lady ask me to scratch her back, under her breasts, and her bum because she itched where her shingles were breaking out...I looked at her and said without a pause, sorry infection control rules will not permit me to do that, turned and walked right out.

BBFRN, BSN, PhD

Specializes in Trauma,ER,CCU/OHU/Nsg Ed/Nsg Research. Has 15 years experience. 3,778 Posts

Originally posted by leesonlpn

I wear my cap, white panty hose, white uniform white shoes - you get the picture. (Hey! Who hollered out DINOSOUR from the back row?) Anyway, I was just starting my shift, and a patient came up to me and asked "excuse me, are you a nurse?"

(No, of course not dear patient, I'm from psych just doing my community hours here.Why do you ask?):confused:

OMG!!!! That is hilarious!!!:roll :chuckle :chuckle
john privett

john privett

20 Posts

I was once digitally disimpacting an elderly lady. After finding a baseball sized lower rectal obstruction and trying my darndest to dislodge said obstruction, it soon became appearant to me that I was going to need more than one digit to get the job done. Nonchalantly, I nudged in first one more digit and then a second and finally started getting the upper hand on the problem. My patient soon started yelling out my name, "Johnny, Johnny!" "Hold on." I reassured her, "I'm almost there." Suddenly she reached back and grabbed my arm in a death grip and asked, "Could you at least tell me that you love me Johnny?"

tattooednursie

tattooednursie, LVN

Specializes in Mostly LTC, some acute and some ER,. 660 Posts

Ok . . . Tonight I was asked something completely outragous. "Do you pass wind on a regular basis?" by an LTC resident.

also,

"Am I allowed to lay down on that there bed?" by an ambulatory LTC resident. DUHHHHHH NOOOOO you have to sit there until your butt developes pressure ulcers and maggots start oozing out, then you can lay in your bed muahahahahahaha

karoline

karoline

20 Posts

A few months ago I was caring for an elderly gentleman who was scheduled for cardiac bypass surgery in the next couple days. He wrote out a will and asked me if I could type it for him. I replied that I couldn't do that - don't have a word processor at work anyways. A social worker and I both witnessed his signature.

Luv cats

Luv cats

18 Posts

We had a lady call one night on the call light to ask us permission if she could "pass gas". No kidding! We also had an ol'crazy lady that was with it enough to call the hospital from her room and have them transfer her to the nurses desk because we wouldn't answer her call light fast enough. The ward clerk handed me the phone and said "It's 107....". I about went through the roof! :angryfire

tattooednursie

tattooednursie, LVN

Specializes in Mostly LTC, some acute and some ER,. 660 Posts

Originally posted by Luv cats

We had a lady call one night on the call light to ask us permission if she could "pass gas". No kidding! We also had an ol'crazy lady that was with it enough to call the hospital from her room and have them transfer her to the nurses desk because we wouldn't answer her call light fast enough. The ward clerk handed me the phone and said "It's 107....". I about went through the roof! :angryfire

:roll :chuckle :roll :chuckle

Can I cut the cheese please? hahahaha

sanakruz, ADN

735 Posts

You get some outlandish requests from involuntarily confined mentally ill clients. My 2 favorites: A women who woke up in the hospital on a 72 hr hold "Who's **** do I have to suck to get out of here!!!",,as she pounded on the nurse's stattion desk. (We had attempted to explain to her the best way to be released. She just wanted the fastest) The other was from a 20 yr old with his first psychotic break who had been picked up shoplifting at a Sears "Will you marry me? You have big T***s and I have a new pair of shoes" (stolen from Sears, no doubt)

Jay-Jay, RN

633 Posts

The shoe was on the other foot with this one. This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever had a nurse ask ME!

I was in hospital, 2nd day post hysterectomy. At 5 in the morning, a nurse WOKE ME UP and asked, "Do you need anything for pain??" :rolleyes:

It crossed my mind to ask her how long she'd had her license......

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