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Jay-Jay RN

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  1. Jay-Jay

    How do I walk back into a room

    I lost my father, my husband and my mother all within 10 months of each other. The hardest part of the whole thing were the 'might-have-been's' that I still beat myself up with. What if I had pushed my husband to have that bladder biopsy that might have found his cancer before it spread to his bones and lymph nodes? What if I had gotten my father out of that horrible nursing home before he suffered a stroke, and then, as a result of sitting off balance due to the stroke, got a bedsore that went all the way to the bone? WHY wasn't I more proactive?? I am still haunted by my last visit with my dad. He was lying totally naked in bed from the waist down: no diaper, not even a sheet overtop of him. The flimsy disposable pad underneath him was soaked with urine, as was the bed, and his shirt tails. (He was wearing only a shirt and undershirt.) I was in the room for over an hour, and no one came near him to check on him. I finally went out into the hallway and tagged a nurse who was passing meds, and begged her to send someone to help change him, as he would panic and latch onto the bed rails with both hands when you tried to turn him, so I couldn't do it myself. In the end, I had to forgive myself for what I felt were my shortcomings, and move on. My intervention would have changed very little, anyway. When the doctor finally DID do a biopsy on my husband, he still did not find the cancer. It was finally found when he examined cells he'd washed out of the bladder. My dad was 89 years old when he died. He still would have developed dementia and died in another nursing home, no matter how good it was. He might have died with more dignity, but he STILL would have died. I have been through a very long healing and grieving process. I did eventually return to nursing after dealing with my parent's estate, but found that coming home to an empty house at the end of a shift was just too depressing. I handed in my resignation about a year and a half after my husband died. I miss being able to help people and make a difference in their lives, but I sure don't miss the stress! Get counselling. I had both secular and religious counselling, and completed a grief and bereavement course. Give yourself time to heal if you can (a leave of absence would be a good idea, if you can get one.) See if your workplace will offer counselling, or refer you to someone who can do it. In my experience, therapists are better than psychiatrists, as the seem to have more empathy and are less wrapped up in the medical crap of brain waves, chemical recations and drugs. One very excellent counsellor I saw was an MD with special training in counselling and psychotherapy. He was marvellous, and he also respected me for the work I did as a nurse.
  2. Jay-Jay

    Tips & advice for the Nursing Exam in Quebec

    Conny, you can ask general questions about what type of things to expect, but posters are not allowed to post actual questions. Nor are you allowed to ask other posters to buy/sell their exam prep guides. Please see other threads on this topic for what to expect with the CRNE...there are LOTS of them! :)
  3. Jay-Jay

    US citizen giving birth in Canada

    Since MM seems to have lost interest in this thread, I am going to close it down again. If she wants it re-opened, she can PM me or another moderator. I think everything that needs to be said has been said, and I appreciate the restraint most of the posters have shown re. this very hot-button topic. Thank you!
  4. Jay-Jay

    US citizen giving birth in Canada

    Okay, re-opening thread. Please, please avoid personal attacks. Motorcycle Mama, many excellent suggestions have been given here. To summarize: 1) There are jobs you can still do with your sciatica problem. Telehealth would be one. 2) You need to more fully investigate financial help that is available from the state you're living in. I am not knowledgable about medical aid in the States, but posters who are have made many suggestions. 3) If you DO go to Canada, you will be considered an illegal alien, unless you have obtained a visa, and will not be legally able to work. 4) If you have too much in the way of assets to qualify for finacial aid, then sell something off! Why do you need THREE vehicles? 5) I, too, am wondering why you became pregnant in the first place, if your job and financial situation were not secure. Given the circumstances, it might be a good idea to put the baby up for adoption. Sometimes prospective parents are even willing to help with medical costs. Please consider some of these suggestions. :)
  5. Jay-Jay

    Target of clinical instructor's venom HELP!!!

    Hurray for you, earle, for having the guts to do that! Most of the students in my class were too gutless to even complain! I once thought I had 3 other students who were going to back me up when I went and complained about our treatment. They all chickened out and I wound up going alone.
  6. Jay-Jay

    US citizen giving birth in Canada

    Locking thread for a cooling-off period.
  7. Jay-Jay

    Target of clinical instructor's venom HELP!!!

    Sue, that SUCKS TO NO END that she would do that! As a nurse with advanced training in palliative care, I know you were definitely in the right there, wanting the pain control to take priority! (And, of course, the patient's own wishes...) Well, this was quite a few years ago. I kind of hope she's retired now. But the last I saw of her, I had returned to my old college to take a community nursing course, and I saw her walking down the hall. She gave me a rather chilly 'hello'.
  8. Jay-Jay

    Telephone Orders- Perplexed in MA!

    I certainly do not feel this is a safe practise. If you didn't personally take the order, you have no business signing your name to it. Just think of the consequences if the transcriber made a mistake...it's YOUR license on the line for his/her mistake!
  9. Jay-Jay

    Target of clinical instructor's venom HELP!!!

    I came into nursing following a career as a teacher, and one of my clinical instructors was just terrible. I complained to the 2nd year supervisor about her, and got nowhere. I then went to the assistant dean, and told her, "If I spoke to my public school kids the way she speaks to us, I would be out the door so fast it would make my head spin!" In addition to criticising my clinical skills in a very harsh manner, she was also discriminating against me because I have a hearing loss. She felt I couldn't do an adequate BP or respiratory assessment. Did she ever check me out on this to prove I could/couldn't? Nooooo! The assistant dean and another instructor personally reviewed my clinical assessment. I also went over it and found several out and out untruths on it. I would not have passed clinical without their help. The teacher was formally reprimanded, after our whole class met with the assistant dean, and forced to take courses to upgrade her teaching and interpersonal skills. (She was one of the teachers of the Interpersonal Relationships course at the school...what a JOKE! :icon_roll ) So, in short, stand up for yourself! No one else is going to, and the assertiveness skills you learn now will stand you in good stead once you become a nurse!
  10. Jay-Jay

    US citizen giving birth in Canada

    Motorcycle Mama, have you thought of possibly doing Telehealth? You might want to check that out. And if sitting for long periods aggravates the sciatica, it is possible to get wireless hands-free headsets, so you can stand up and walk around the room.
  11. Jay-Jay

    Chronic COPD'er, 1 lung, 02 @ 6L/min. What would you do?

    I'll echo what other have said: sorry to hear about your patient, DutchGirl, but WOW, has this thread been an education! Did it take an autopsy to discover the pancreatitis? Shows that even doctors can really, really blow it now and then. But given the WBC count, yeah, I certainly would have thought some sort of sepsis.
  12. Jay-Jay

    Tips & advice for the Nursing Exam in Quebec

    Sorry, connyrn, advertising/solicitation is not allowed on this site. :welcome: and best of luck with the exam!
  13. Jay-Jay

    Out of nursing program cause i am smoker!!!

    Burnout, please, the OP has asked SEVERAL times that we not bash her for smoking. That is NOT the issue here. And nurses who work at this facility ARE allowed to smoke on the grounds. It's just the students who must abide by this teacher's 'no smoking' rule, which is not even written in the college's manual.
  14. Jay-Jay

    Out of nursing program cause i am smoker!!!

    Could we stick to the original issue, please, and steer clear of any personal attacks? I don't want Marie's post about the life of this thread to be a self-fulfilling prophecy!
  15. Jay-Jay

    Out of nursing program cause i am smoker!!!

    misstaz, I'd just like to point out something that has been repeated by several different posters, and which you don't seem to have picked up on yet. I think it's really important that you understand it. It's not that non-smokers don't LIKE the smell of smoke on someone's clothing, it's that some of us are so allergic to it, it can seriously harm our health. One poster mentioned having seen TWO different patients go into respiratory arrest due to being exposed to strong odours. In the one case, it was perfume that caused the problem, not smoke. (I am also very allergic to certain perfumes, and the same rules need to apply to them in hospitals as to cigarette smoke.) No matter which way you slice it, as a nurse, our patient's health and well being has to be the number one priority. As for the instructor, well, I've said my piece elsewhere. Stand up for your rights, and don't back down. This instructor's behaviour is very unprofessional. And this is coming from a former teacher! You DO NOT criticize a student in public. You DO NOT threaten to tell a 33 year old woman's mother about her smoking.
  16. Jay-Jay

    Out of nursing program cause i am smoker!!!

    Jim, I don't NEED to see those studies! I am one of those unfortunate individuals who is very sensitive to smoke. I was suffering from a bad cold one day, and when a couple of my biology students came to ask me questions after being outside for a smoke break, the smell from their clothing sent me into an immediate fit of coughing. I had to ask them to back off so I could get my breath back to answer their questions. We are health care professionals. We OWE it to our patients not to do anything that might adversely affect their health. I do, however, agree that this teacher is bullying the OP. It is NOT fair to dock her grade, then ask for those additional papers. Nor is it right to threaten to tell her mother. I was bullied by an instructor in nursing school, and would not have passed if I hadn't stood up for myself. This teacher's behaviour was so over the top, our clinical group had a meeting with the VP of the school to air our grievances. The teacher was demoted to teaching part time, and had to take remedial courses. She showed a total lack of respect for her students, some of whom were adults. I have a background in teaching, and I told the VP that if I EVER spoke to my students the way she speaks to us, I would be out the door so fast it would make my head spin. What she was on my case about was my hearing loss. She kept saying she felt I couldn't do an adequate chest or BP assessment. Did she EVER check me out on this? NOOO! The one time I needed her help with an assessment, she had 'other' things to do. Yet she stated on my evaluation that I could not do an adequate assessment. And this was after me buying a $300 amplified stethescope. (Did THAT ever put a dent in my poor, impoverished student's budget!) There are times when you need to stand up for yourself. I was told when I started nursing that I would need to learn to become more assertive. Little did I know it was going to be the teachers I'd have to be the most assertive with. The smoking policy SHOULD be thoroughly spelled out in the college handbook. Just like in charting for nursing: if it ain't written down....