What you'd REALLY like to say....

Nursing Students CNA/MA

Published

Ok, so I know I can't be the only one who dreams about just for ONCE saying what's really going through her mind! I love my job, and I do it for the love of my residents, and I always give 100% to make sure they are safe, happy, and cared for. However, I am also extremely sarcastic by nature - and sometimes, well lots of times, I think one thing - but of course say and act completely polite and professional!

Let's see what we all are really thinking in those times of complete stress and chaos we all know too well! I'll start....

To the A&Ax3 perfectly coherent pt who is mean and obnoxious and thinks that he is at the Ritz not a nursing home, and thinks every CNA is his personal assistant / slave::angryfire

DO NOT under any circumstances hit your call light for me to come and pick up your breakfast/lunch/dinner tray - the NANOsecond you finish eating!!!! REALLY! You KNOW that at some point during the 20 other times you call me in there, that I will pick it up on my way out!!!! This drives me absolutely up the wall. Same goes for your urinal (with all 5 cc's of output)!

Stop calling the poor confused residents filthy names. Just because you choose to sit in the hallway all day long doesn't make you the hall monitor! Just because they aimlessly walk or wheel around doesn't mean they are stupid. They are confused. Telling them to get the hell away from you and go back to where "they belong" is nasty and uncalled for. I sometimes secretly hope you will become exactly like them. Soon.

When you ask for an appointment at the barbershop at 8:50 am and they don't open until 9 am, don't hit your call button at 8:55 and ask if I got you a 9 am appointment! I know this may come as a shock to you - but you are not the center of the universe!! You will probably get scheduled sometime later that day, or - GASP - maybe even the next day!

To those wonderful family members we all love so much:

Just because you have an internet connection and access to WebMD, doesn't make you a medical professional. Why the Docs and DON's entertain your completely idiotic and unfounded requests - I will never know. Do you know how hard it is to keep residents properly hydrated? Yet you insist your loved one is over hydrated, and insist he only have one glass of water at every meal. AND you come in during meals and pull a bottle of sea salt out of your purse and dump handfuls onto his food. Hmmmm. OK! :banghead:

You haven't been to visit grandma in over a year. Grandma is completely contracted, hoyer lift, check and change, with aphasia. When you come and tell me that she told you she has to go to the bathroom and you want me to "take her to the restroom", I am not sure whether I want to giggle or slap you. :uhoh3:

...

Keep em coming! Just some healthy venting! Thanks a ton!

Reading most of this thread has been great! The stories you guys tell are priceless and makes me think about what I'm going to encounter when I become a CNA.

Thankfully I have worked in retail/retail management for almost 10 years including a short stint at as a cell phone customer service rep so I have a pretty thick skin when it comes to how abusive and physical people can get. Oh God the stories I could tell here if it was an appropriate thread!

Did any of you work in customer service before becoming a CNA? Did you find that it helped you deal better with the people you encountered? I think I would tolerate their behavior a little better because in my mind I would just tell myself "They're sick, in pain and stuck in a place they don't want to be." rather than some person who screaming at me and kicking displays over because they don't understand the return policy WHICH IS CLEARLY WRITTEN ON THE BACK OF YOUR RECIEPT!!"

Sorry...sorry..it still comes out of me!

Another thing that upsets me is the amount of posts I read regarding lack of teamwork at their facility. THAT is going to drive me up a wall since the last job I was in required nothing BUT teamwork and managing a lot of teams or just individuals in general. If you can't help because you are generally busy fine, but if I catch you in a lie or screwing off after I'm done with my task there's going to be a huge issue.

God I have a feeling I'm going to have a bloody tongue from biting it so much!

*edit* One of those retail jobs was at an adult novelty shop when i was 18 (It was like Victoria's Secret only more naughty) so I can deal with all the weird perverts as well.

What I'd like to say to the resident that has hit call light for the 22nd time in the past hour(True story):

"Only God can help you now."

Specializes in none as of yet.

To the CNA that was supposed to help me with a room transfer:

"B****, this is not Antiques Roadshow! Quit looking at this guys' stuff like you are assigning value to it! I will finish this by myself because you are about as useful as t*ts on a bull...."

(Obviously, did not say this but I did chase her off. I found the whole thing to be very inapporpriate)

ATTN family members:

Please please PLEASE go take a Xanax and get out of my way before I *accidentally* run your foot over with the Hoyer or hit you in the face with a dirty brief.

Specializes in LTC.

To a certain daughter:

I can't believe you buy into this ****. Every time you come to visit your mother starts in with "poor old me, nobody likes me, nobody thinks I'm special, boo hoo" and then you give us the evil eye every time we come in the room, and by the time you leave your mother is a blubbering mess because as we all know, your mother isn't happy unless she's miserable. However when your brother visits, he doesn't feed into her sob stories, and miraculously Mommy is just fine when he comes.

And to another daughter:

I know that you're putting on the call light every 10 minutes and making a different staff member take your mother to the bathroom each time (or actually, sit on the toilet without doing anything because she already went!). I don't know what kind of game this is, but knock it off. I know you think your mother needs more attention, but isn't that why you're visiting? Let us take care of people who don't have visitors and you can sit there with your mother playing peek-a-boo and making cooing noises like you always do. Have fun.

And to another daughter:

I know that you're putting on the call light every 10 minutes and making a different staff member take your mother to the bathroom each time (or actually, sit on the toilet without doing anything because she already went!). I don't know what kind of game this is, but knock it off. I know you think your mother needs more attention, but isn't that why you're visiting? Let us take care of people who don't have visitors and you can sit there with your mother playing peek-a-boo and making cooing noises like you always do. Have fun.

I love the ones that put on the light and say, "Mom told me that she needs to go to the bathroom urgently and she is afraid she may wet her pants if she has to wait much longer. Oh, and she said she didn't want to use a bedpan. She likes to use the toilet instead."

Um, excuse me? Your mom *told* you that she needed to go the bathroom? -- the same woman who had a massive CVA and hasn't been able to utter a single word in the last two years; the same woman that is completely paralyzed on one side and bed-bound; the same woman that is totally and completely incontinent of bowel and bladder and must wear Depends; the same woman that has contractures and ZERO use of one side because you signed a form stating you didn't want your mom to get any type of therapy because "it might hurt her or make her uncomfortable"; the same woman that is unconscious 80% of the time and is forced to watch Sesame Street and Dora the Explorer the other 20% because you "think they are good for her." Really? Your mom said all of that? If your mom really could talk, she'd be cussing you out for the crappy way you insist on treating her like an infant.

Specializes in LTC.

Wow i wonder if we work in the same place. I also love it when you're doing care on the mother and the daughter keeps on shrieking, "It's okay Mom I'm here!" Right, because a brief change is so traumatic that your presence is needed here. Okay.

Wow i wonder if we work in the same place. I also love it when you're doing care on the mother and the daughter keeps on shrieking, "It's okay Mom I'm here!" Right, because a brief change is so traumatic that your presence is needed here. Okay.

Duh. Don't you know that the American Psychiatric Association has published reputable studies confirming that routine nail care is one of the leading causes of PTSD?

Specializes in LTC/Rehab.

"Quit stripping in the middle of the night!!" :madface:

Specializes in LTC.
"Quit stripping in the middle of the night!!" :madface:

Middle of the night? Try middle of the hallway... at lunchtime. Not 5 minutes after I got this woman up I come out of another room and she was naked! With both fingers up her nose! Then when I'm trying to cover her she hits me in the face with those same fingers!

So happy I found this thread.This is a great way to secretly vent.lol For the residents who can do for themselves but just do not want too.I secretly want to hide your call light. :)

Patient Family:My mom needs to be changed

Cna:Oh really thats what that smell means!!

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