I don't know why but that statement makes my jaw clench up everytime I hear it.
I had a patient the other day ask me how I was going to insert a foley since "the head is down there, wont that hurt the baby?" For the love god, people .... come on .. 2 HOLES! SERIOUSLY!
and my favorite of all time ...
"Does that machine beep everytime I dilate?" .. this one left me speechless
Please share your "omg, no she didn't say/ask that" quotes
"Oh my, am I on a roll now, cuz I just remembered my all time favorite. FOB is married, but not to patient. FOB's wife calls L&D unit (several times) but on the time that I answer the phone, she wants to know how far the patient is dilated and how much longer until she delivers. I explain to her that I cannot tell her that and I will transfer her call to patient if she would like, she gets upset and refuses to be transfered to patient's room, then tells me that she has a "right" to know because her husband is FOB and she needs to know when he will be home!! "
You definately did the right thing, but I really feel so sorry for her. Her husband is a jerk!
Once I went into a pt's room to do her admission assessment and found a young guy sitting by her, rubbing her shoulder, and another older man standing on the other side of the bed. I, at one point during my assessment, looked at the younger guy and asked if he was the baby's father (yes, I have since learned not to "assume" ANYTHING). The patient said, "No, this is my husband." Then she pointed to the older man and said, "This is my baby's daddy.".
Once I went into a pt's room to do her admission assessment and found a young guy sitting by her, rubbing her shoulder, and another older man standing on the other side of the bed. I, at one point during my assessment, looked at the younger guy and asked if he was the baby's father (yes, I have since learned not to "assume" ANYTHING). The patient said, "No, this is my husband." Then she pointed to the older man and said, "This is my baby's daddy.".
i'll help, i've got one you all will love. when i was 18 i worked in a path lab. the first time i saw a uterus from a tah i thought the woman would no longer be able to have sex... thank the lord i never actually exposed my ignorance and asked for clarification on that one, they would have had a field day in the break room i'm sure. instead i went to the library and looked through a couple of books and learned more about female anatomy on my own.
i worked with an rn on a birthing unit once who thought a woman had to reach orgasm in order to ovulate. i was surprised that an educated person specializing in women's health wouldn't have corrected that piece of misinformation along the way. but then i've spouted some doozies in my time, too. lol
i get irked when daddies, as i help their son to breast feed, follow my comment of, "wow, he is really is good at this!" with "yeah, just like his old man."
i've got news for you, buddy, that baby is not doing the same thing nor for the same reasons as you!
how they can equate breastfeeing with their own sexual actions is beyond me. don't get me wrong - i do see pregnancy and birth as part of a woman's sexuality and i do see the two as related, and i have no problems with couples who cuddle to help get the baby out (what gets 'em in gets 'em out), but - for some reason the breastfeeding comment really bothers me.
i'm sure you're right. this is an age old dilemma. in fact, in the '80s, it was downright encouraged.
when my classmates and i expressed our frustration, our clinical instructor told us to consider "the psychosocial issues that might be involved." she actually said, "being in the hospital may be a woman's one and only chance to feel pampered, get some rest, and have somebody tend to her needs, before she has to go home and tend to the needs of her family, and a new baby. there's no harm in indulging her."
lol, i wonder if that's why some moms have 8, 10, 12 kids---because they love the drama and love being the center of attention once again, even if it's short lived.
i did have one stay-at-home mom who was having baby #4 or 5 tell me that she never goes on vacation or anything, and that her pp hospital stay every year was sort of her vacation from it all.
in level ii nsy, my worst 'irk' is visitors (hispanic grandmothers seem to be the worst offenders for some reason) who wake a perfectly happy, sleeping baby and then get upset because s/he is crying. it makes it so hard to cluster care. i'm usually busy at another baby's bedside at the time.
i want to say, "well, s/he was fine until you woke him up!"
patient (mom or dad) brings newborn to the nursery and tells us...."no pacifiers, no formula and don't bring the baby back to the room until the next scheduled breastfeeding" which they want to be about 3 hours after the last feeding!!! so what do they suggest i do with their hungry, rooting, screaming child??
ooohhhhhh makes me soooo crazy!!!
i tell the mom that i will try reasonable measures to console the child, but if i can't give a bottle, she must feed the child when s/he is hungry. and i do just that - i will take those babies right back out if reasonable measures don't console them. if you want to breastfeed, then breastfeed! (i did)
i will work a little harder to console babies for a while, if the mom has been bf on demand all day and simply needs a break because she's exhausted.
mom and dad have made the decision to circumsize their little boy to make him "perfect" (their words not mine-god must not know anything) and as i am taking him for his little surgery the mom says "is it going to hurt?":eek: ask your dh if we can take a slice off of his manlihood and see what he says..
sorry - gotta comment on this one.
i don't so much hear the 'prefect' part, but i do hear the 'is it goning to hurt' and moms acting all aprehensive, as i'm signing the consent/taking the baby.
i've gotten to the point i usually say, "well, a circumcision is not medically neccessary - it's just cosmetic. if you are that worried (upset, ...), perhaps you should wait and think about it some more. you don't have to have it done in the hospital. you can even wait and let your son choose for himself when he's older." of course they nearly always go ahead with it anyway. it's amazing when i put it back on them - gently reminding them that they are the one asking for this - how fast their attitude changes.
my two sons are intact. i tell the screaming circ'd boys in the nursery all the time, "too late, poor guy. you should have come to my house. we don't whack weenies at my house."
Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN
12,126 Posts
I'd love to say "Hmm ok, but numbing your skin isn't going to help you much in the pain dept."