What is your most outrageous medical emergency repsonse in a correctional facility

uraqt2 · Jul 25, 2007

I've been in corrrctions for 7 years and have numerous stories to tell but the one that stands out most is a pshychotic male inmate who swore that he was pregnant. He waddled as though he was well over due and was convinced that his member was the umbelical cord coming out. Try as we may to convince him that he wasn't pregnant he wouldn't hear any of it. He went so far as to try to cut his member off since we wouldn't do anything about it. Needless to say meds finally kicked in and he couldn't believe what he had done.

Oh here's another favorite.... get an emergency call for an inmate who got stung by a bee and is having an allergic reaction. Upon arrival inmate reports he didn't get stung but is having crushing chest pain. Pulse is 54 threaded and dropping. Got an ambulance there and he had bypass done. Came back to us and is most grateful. Just goes to show you can't always depend on COs to give the accurate details.

Just one more thing I'm so glad to hear that fake seizures aren't isolated occurrances. We have so many that you lose track of them and it really is amazing how real they can appear.

texascowgirl · Jul 27, 2007

at a facility which of course shall remain nameless, a very old man was "raped" with a broom handle and presented to the medical department during sick call with the chief complaint of rectal bleeding. the MD order was "issue offender 3 extra rolls of toilet paper per week x 1 week". end of story.

disclaimer: i was not present during that shift and had nothing to do with that occurence. i will say that when i practice, i am completely and thoroughly up to date on all facility policies and procedures and SOP's, and practice accordingly.

JailRN · Jul 27, 2007

oh, the stories we correctional nurses could tell-----you are right, we ARE a special breed, but so are the nurses anywhere--I couldn't work , say, peds, for example, it would kill me. I'm tough, and take no crap from the IM, but, I treat them with respect UNTIL they don't deserve it. TTTHHHHEEEEENNN, "Sir, do NOT let my size (5'4"--110#), NOR my age (54) fool you, because I will STOMP you into the ground and mail whatever is left home to ya Mamma in a SMALL envelope!:lol_hitti Now, SIT DOWN and do as I've asked!!" (They usually think I'm carzy OR capable and they don't mess with it. :lol2: )

I've had numerous

IM who 'seize' in time with the music tha's playing, then (after deep sternal rub,) eyes pop open, sit up, and clearly say--'I had a seizure' :jester:

paramedics who come in, kick the IM, and yell, 'GET UP!!' and the IM does,

jailers who find (with me there) drugs, money, and GUNS (loaded) in anal canals!!

IM who think their 'right' to medical care includes, heart transplants, boob jobs, tummy tucks, nose jobs, gastric bypass, AND sex changes,

IM who claim to be--diabetic, hypertensive, etc, because their 'mamma' is ("When your Mother bacomes MY responsibility, I'll worry about your Mother, until then, did an American doctor tell you that YOU are??") :lol2:

IM who have piercings in places that I never thought about piercing (I did that for about 2 years)

IM who are wearing chains and padlocks on their genitals (hysterically crying--"But Master will be MOST upset and displeased if I remove it"--hey it's simple, you take it off or we will cut it off):rotfl:

My day is never dull and just when I think I've seen it all-I find out I haven't:banghead:

(and I'm trying to get the police chief to put a light bar on top of my car:redlight:)

BUT

I love my job

and

I wouldn't trade it for the world!!!!!!

Monica RN,BSN · Sep 28, 2007

after 6 years...i've seen a lot.
one of the strangest ones was a pencil inserted up the member.
the inmate had some weird sexual practices to say the least!

we had a yahoo who would shove anything he could get his hands on up his member. he even swallowed a toothbrush, a pen and various other items. he has been hospitalized for surgical retrevement of foreigh objects, then he returned he was in 4 point restraints with a 24 hour officer to babysit him.. well, he went to court yesterday ans is out in society now// i swear if i see him in the community, i will say 'do not touch me.. i know where your hands have been!" :uhoh3:

akwesook · Oct 4, 2007

Had one molester in a co. jail who came in with c/o "needs catheter to pee"-- exam, had an old dirty pic line up there along with much infection and filth

Monica RN,BSN · Oct 5, 2007

Had one molester in a co. jail who came in with c/o "needs catheter to pee"-- exam, had an old dirty pic line up there along with much infection and filth

Nasty.. we had a very sicko man in our county jail who was obcessed with shoving things up his member. GROSS he was.. he is outof jail now and among our society.. SICK!!

I had 4 signals in the pods 2 nights ago.. all nonsense

1) someone was pepper sprayed in a max pod

2) 2 girls fighting in the pod

3) a yahoo brought in by LEO who was hit in the head with a cinder block with a huge goose egg and orbital hematomas.. sent him out for ct scan and medical clearance

4) a gut complaining of "sweaty" do we treat sweaty?? I told him to go take off those extra three shirts he was wearing and go back to sleep :uhoh3:

ex1140 · Oct 24, 2007

Attempted suicide by hanging...I hate those type of calls...we have to drop everything and rush out to get these guys...I have been very fortunate because not yet, have I had one that succeeded. However, the calls are very annoying...and it's one of the reasons I want out of corrections.

nancykday · Oct 30, 2007

Call out one time to evaluate an i/m who was under a bed, walked in took a look under the bed, talked very briefly with the i/m, left and went out to the CO and told them, "Yup, your right, she's under the bed." and returned to the infirmary. Another time called out to talk with an i/m who was " talking crazy " Went in and talked with the i/m who told me that the FBI was outside of the H/U, bugging her room, and then she told me that I should know all about that, since I was Marilyn Monroe. Let here room and thold the CO's she was quite sane, that I would never agree that an i/m was talking crazy, if she thought I looked like Marilyn Monroe.

In both cases not sure what they expected me to do since both individuals any thoughts of self harm or harm to others, and weren't being disruptive. And anyone who thinks I look like marilyn monroe is not only intellegent but has great eye sight :lol2:

Truegem · Nov 10, 2007

I have a funny story from passing meds in the mental health area.

Back in the day we used to give a lot of liquid psych meds. I handed this guy his little 30 cc cup of Prolixin or whatever it was and he promptly marched directly to the toilet, held the cup of medicine over the bowl and angrily said "I am not taking this medicine without an authorization number!" So, I leaned down and into the hatch I said "Forty three". And he took his medicine.

:)