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]My first year out of college I had an unusually rough transition into nursing and the real world. Personally I suffered a car accident (rear ended) a couple of weeks after graduation and was completely stood up by the woman who had hired me as a nanny. I was expecting to work for her and study for my boards at the same time. As a result I spent the remainder of the summer broke and studying hard for the boards and failed on my first attempt with 265 questions. I will never forget how torn apart I was when I saw "fail" online and got my big packet in the mail informing me a detailed explanation of how I was "near pass" in all areas. I cried for days. I studied different the second time around and meanwhile I dealt with bullying at work from several angles. Techs and nurses on the floor had poor morale and being the newbie I was always someone's target, however I did not want to quit because I was afraid it would look bad on my resume. When I reported the incidents they were ignored and not acknowledged by management. Fortunately I passed the second time around, however I was paired with a bullying and unprofessional preceptor who talked down to me constantly and tried to make me feel stupid. My manager was very unfair toward me and disliked me from the get go and when I went to her to get a new preceptor, she seemed calm, but when it came time to the day we were to discuss the issue she brought in the entire leadership staff on the unit and turned it into a huge meeting. I stated everything I had been through with the preceptor and how I was treated. They listened quietly to my side then brought her in. From that point I was yelled at and belittled by everyone in that meeting despite all of the unprofessional things I had stated were done to me by my preceptor. None of it was addressed and they made out everything to be my fault. The people in that meeting smiled as my manager literally slammed her hand down at the table and yelled at me- while the others said things to edge her on. It was like they were trying to break me down and enjoyed watching this. On top of that after the meeting she gave me documents with severe write-ups for very random and minor incidents such as coming to work on a different day with my preceptor than another. She did this with a smile, literally and just told me to sign- did not tell me that I had the right to a rebuttal which everyone does when they are written up. Eventually they switched me to a different preceptor but I felt that the whole incident damaged my reputation on the floor. Many of the staff were not welcoming to me and there was a bit of unclear air between my manager and I. Because of the drama I think the new preceptor had preconceived notions about me. I thought she was really nice and supportive and found out she was saying all kinds of things behind my back and talking to my old preceptor. She took a bad day I was having personally and blew it out of proportion to call me incompetent despite all of the high marks and praise she had been giving me. She went to management and said God knows what and I was fired in a surprise attack with a smile on my manager's face. (I was told it was just a meeting instead of coming in to work). When I tried to appeal it with higher administration, it did not come through and they supported the termination. I am so distraught and I do not know how to feel about nursing. I ask that you all can somehow take something from my story. To those of you joining the nursing world be careful which coworkers you trust, know when you don't belong on a unit, and trust your gut when you know something is just not right. Please pray for me as I struggle to overcome these stumbling stones and the pain and humiliation I have suffered.

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Specializes in Endoscopy.

my :heartbeat aches for you and my prayers are with you!!

come to texas!!! we love new nurses on our floor!!! :nurse:

Good luck in all you do. :D

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Specializes in None.

WOW!!! I'm speechless and that is rare for me!

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Specializes in ER/ICU, CCL, EP.

I am sure the entire situation was hurtful. Bottom line is, you have a license. Go find a new job in a facility that will appreciate you. I wish you luck.

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Specializes in ED/trauma.

Thank you for sharing. Nearly every day I go to work (I precepted for 9 weeks (was sick for 1) and have been on my own for 3 weeks now), I am so anxious and worry myself to pieces. I think of how rough I have it, sometimes, with my isolation / incontinent / AMS / gero / bedfast / whatever patients. However, there are few co-workers (only a couple on nights) with whom I've had issues.

While I am sorry to hear your situation, I am thankful that you were willing to share it. It helps me to stop and realize that I really don't have it so bad after all.

Thanks again, and good luck to you!

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Specializes in Telemetry, Med Surg, Pediatrics, ER.

I am so sorry your first year has been so difficult. Please don't let a few people turn you against nursing. It is not that way everywhere. I can empathize because I worked in a toxic environment. You will find a place where you fit and is a nurturing environment. You know that saying, "Misery loves company." Sometimes a group of miserable people thrive on pulling others into their world. Hold your head up and get out there and find a job where you can prove you are a good nurse. Many hugs and best wishes! :nurse:

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Specializes in L&D, PP, Nursery.

I recently changed jobs for job security and financial reasons. I had a great preceptor but another preceptor was constantly comparing my to her orientee (who had NO experience in the specialty). I had 4 years experience in this area but did another area of nursing for 6 years so, yes, I was a little out of the loop. Anyway, the other preceptor is just a troublemaker, constantly nitpicking little things and basically running to the supervisor for every little thing she could find. I'm no longer on orientation, but despise working with this woman. Anyway, my old unit, at another hospital has an opening and my former coworkers are begging me to come back. If I'm such a terrible nurse, why would they want me to come back? Why is my current unit always calling me in on my days off if I'm so terrible? My confidence level was terrible at first but it's coming back again. My point is.......no matter where you go, you're going to have difficult coworkers to deal with. Some have the "greater than thou" attitude and will find fault in everyone. Don't let it bring you down. Just hold your head high and at least appear confident. They really get off on knowing they are bugging you. I think it's because of their own lack of self esteem. Good luck!

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Specializes in OB, Med-Surg.

you know, not every place is the way you describe here in your post. And thank God, not all people ( or fellow nurses, techs, other coworkers... ) are the way you describe here either. I've been in tough spots with unforgiving back stabbers. Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to pack up and move on if that is possible for your situation. In my case, I felt it was a must in order to survive. You belong somewhere, you just have to find where. Good luck to you.......

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Specializes in Emergency, ICU, PACU, Hospice.

Everything happens for a reason...

I started out in a metropolitan ER that was known for it's acuity of non-trauma patients. I recieved my CEN (the only one in the department), was the final step preceptor (all new hires had to be evaluated by me before coming to the floor). I also established the geriatric education program and was respected and trusted by the physicians.

A position finally opened up in the PACU (usually a nurse has to retire to open a position) which I had always wanted since I became a nurse, I applied and was accepted. I thought all was going well when my manager called me in one day and told me (without specific reason) that I wasn't working out and had a choice to quit or be fired-I was taken aback. Hindsight being what it is I think it was because I clocked in-worked-clocked out and went home-never involved in politics and this agitated the power click of nurses.

I called my old ER manager to come back and she had the assistant manager tell me I was not a good fit in the ED, he later called me and said that she was angry I had left and was holding a grudge.

Off to the burbs...returned to a suburban ED...didn't like it from day one..low acuity, non-teaching.

Now at a level I trauma center, major teaching facility in the PACU...LOVE IT! Long road to get there but I view each step as learning and meant to happen.

Never stop looking, never give up...something good will happen!

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Specializes in Case Management.

I totally agree with Wendy RN. There will be a unit somewhere that is better suited for you and if this group is that stupid that they would push a new nurse out of the door like that then they will build themselves a reputation of being a difficult unit and will find themselves short all the time. You need to keep your chin up and remember that there are other jobs out there and you will find your niche. Just keep looking and you will find it. If you have problems again with a preceptor, go to the manager. If the manager does not want to help, go over her head to the supervisor. I would go all the way up to the DON, but that is how I am. I make friends with the big wigs and make sure they know my name and how to spell it. I have had many a big wig come to bat for me in bad situations.

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i am so sorry to hear of your situation. i will pray for you.

BEST OF LUCK!!!!!!

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Specializes in ICU/CCU.

I am very sorry for your experience, lilywater. I also had to change preceptors during my orientation period and had a challenging relationship with my second preceptor. On top of the regular stress of orienting, those kinds of interpersonal conflicts can crush your spirit.

Take some time to clear your head. You can learn a lot from your experience. It sounds like you were thrown into a somewhat toxic environment, but you can develop methods for coping with future situations. I have found that it is never wise to try to assign blame. If you have trouble with another preceptor in the future, immediately go to your manager and ask to be reassigned. Do not bring up instances of your preceptor's unprofessionalism (chances are that your manager knows all about this person's habits already). Say something to the effect of, "Nurse X and I have less than compatible styles of teaching and learning. Although I admire and respect X as a nurse, I feel that I would be better able to learn with another preceptor."--or some other similar blah blah blah. Resist the urge to say anything negative about the preceptor even if she's a complete monster. They already know your preceptor; what you are communicating in a situation like this is a sense of your own professionalism. I made a little speech like that to my nurse manager and assistant manager when I asked to change my preceptor. They immediately got these big grins on their faces and passed a knowing look between themselves--they KNEW this nurse was a crappy preceptor when they assigned her to me!

There are books you can read on how to hone your interpersonal communication skills. An oldie but goodie is Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People." Effective communication is about getting what you want while keeping those around you satisfied with the situation.

I wish you the best of luck. You can pull through this and learn from it. Take time for yourself. I will say some prayers for you too.

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