VENTING ABOUT MY FIRST JOB... my awful memory... and my awful orientation :(

BradleyRN · Feb 27, 2009

she sometimes will give a resident their 9pm meds at 6pm (if they go to bed early... i dont know if i agree with this...) and when she started her med pass 10 minutes late tonight and a resident came to ask where her pills were she was nasty to her and said "f*** you" under her breath.

This is a pathetic excuse for a nurse! If she is willing to curse a pt under her breath in front of you, what might she do if you werent there? Giving 9PM meds at 6PM is also inexcusable, and against every regulation in the book. You mentioned that you dont want to be a tattletail, but orienting with this type of nurse is worse than not orienting at all. You dont want to be her "friend" anyway, because she is a pathetic excuse for a human being. Tell your mgmt that you wish to not train under these people.

It is normal to feel that you dont know anything, but certainly have no reverence for these idiots. In a few months you will likely surpass them, while providing dignity to your patients, and not nursing like a criminal.

The good nurse you trained with does not look at you as an inconvenience. Request to work all her shifts.

PM me if you have any questions regarding nursing or anything else, and i will gladly help you.:)

ilovethebeach08 · Feb 27, 2009

Hi,

First let me say, I feel for you. My first RN nursing job (I went straight to RN, never was an LPN first) was in a long term care facility. I had to work while I was still in school getting my NP so I took the job. The nurses there sound very similar to the ones I worked with. Report was usually just gossiping. They actually wanted me to pass meds though so they didn't have to do any of their own work and could sit around and chat. Some of the nurses orienting me would get mad if I asked which residents needed their meds crushed in applesauce, or who liked ice in their water versus who didn't...because they knew the residents preferences I thought I should ask, but they usually just got annoyed. The CNAs didn't speak much English so that was hard too. It was a really hard job for me.

One time when I was doing the whole med pass for the first time I noticed that they hadn't been giving one of the residents the right dosage of his beta blocker, they had been giving him two times the prescribed dosage, and because the facility was too cheap to buy a pill scorer, they wouldn't cut the pill in half, so they'd just been giving him twice as much. I pointed this out to the nurse and she wanted me to just give him the whole pill but I couldn't in good faith purposelly do a med error. She wanted me to just do it and hide it. But never forget, if you are giving the med, it is YOUR LICENSE on the line, not the supervising nurses. I reported the issue to the director of nursing and the orienting nurse was really really mad at me for the whole rest of the week. But you do what you have to do to protect patient safety and to protect what yo uhave worked so hard for.

Don't feel bad if long term care and rehab isn't for you. It's a hard job for anyone. I would highly recommend you finish and get your RN, it will open up many more opportunities for you. I did home health care for a while after the nursing home (I quit after like 8 weeks) and liked home health care a lot more...the only thing there is that I didn't feel totally confident as a new grad by myself, without other nurses or docs around if something went wrong you just have to call the paramedics. But keep looking, don't give up your hope, find a different job if you can. And finish the RN! You won't regret it. Good luck! Keep smiling! You are not alone. Every nurse has had some kind of a terrible work place experience.

SummerGarden, BSN, MSN, RN · Feb 27, 2009

i would just like to state that i am a new grad rn in a hospital and i have come in contact with some of the behaviors you have described (it is not only the ills of ltc). my last preceptor was a disaster as a preceptor but a good nurse. she too ignored me most for the shift and did not let me do anything when i was not licensed. she treated me like dirt... i was treated better as a tech! the only way i got to do anything was being assertive (like you). however, when i did, i got criticized as if i was doing everything wrong. twice i intervened when patients were not doing well (and in one case it may have saved his life) but i got criticized for overreacting!

not to mention that she undermined all of my decisions to cnas even minor ones like getting patients vitals after the cna asked if i needed them! in some cases she took all the patients and assigned me none... in other cases she took the higher acuity patients and assigned me patients that can go home... in the cases where i had patients who were pretty much waiting to leave, i helped other nurses out and even the techs (this too upset her because she felt like i was neglecting something... i never was... i was always caught up with the little work she gave me).

when i got my license she still did not talk to me much..!! it took an hour to be assigned a patient after getting report on one shift (you can imagine that i was behind)!!! i always made sure to communicate patient needs etc. and always tried to be respectful with or without my lisence. however, my preceptor was very sensitive and emotional and unless i made it clear i was trying to be respectful, she took everything i said wrong!!! if i asked a question she thought i was questioning her nursing judgment. it was bad!!! like you, i know it is not me because i worked with other nurses when she was off and i had no problems. people were happy to work with me and were upset that i was not working with him/her on the next shift.

anyway, i chalk it up to personality problems. and so, when i was asked recently how my orientation was going i was honest and fair. we just do not click! i now have a new preceptor who i am told has precept for over 10 years. plus, my new preceptor's style is to treat me like i am not on orientation so i have a feel of reality. i can make decisions and not have them undermined, but have a support system of orientation at the same time. so i am allowed to think and provide patient care to high acuity patients while orienting. if i have questions i am told that i can ask! plus, communication is good. i cannot wait to work my next shift, unlike the feeling of dread i had with my last preceptor.

my suggestion to you is take the high road and let your don know that you do not click well with the two nurses you have and you request the nurse that you are able to work with.... dons want to keep their new grads; this is why they hired you in the first place. gl! :twocents:

lpnflorida · Feb 27, 2009

I feel empathy for the feelings you are expressing. Starting any new job is overwhelming, now multiply that times 10 for nurses. First reassure yourself you will get it. Knowing your drugs and labs will come. It takes making a note to yourself of each medication you are not familiar with or lab test. Then looking them up either when you have time at work or while at home. 30 years and I still run up against medications I am not familiar with. This is on going for nurses. I keep a clip board with a thin piece of card board in it just for my list of unfamiliar meds, this helps me to memorize them.

As to the nurses who are orientating you. If possible request to work with then nurse whom you admire. I do not feel this is unreasonable.

As to this job does not feel like your niche. I have hated my first job for a year. I hated my current job for a year. Why did I hate them? I felt like a duck out of water, I felt I did not know enough. This too passes. In time I loved both of my jobs as I gained confidence in my skills and the skills of my co-workers. It does take time.

It will get better. Use your time away from work to think of how to improve what you need while at work. Take out your books and refresh yourself on common procedures you most likely will run up against in your job. Take out your drug book. List the most common drugs you will be giving.

Itshamrtym · Feb 27, 2009

Sorry that you are having to go through this. It sounds like you are an awesome nurse. I would talk to your direct supervisor and see about switching preceptors (except the good one). I know that LTC isn't your cup of tea, but as you stated jobs are hard to come by. Maybe if you get some experience under your belt you will be able to get another job in the future that would be more suitable to you. Keep your head up, keep the faith...... It will all work out. Please keep us posted on how you are doing... TAKE CARE>>>>

lorenwithano · Feb 27, 2009

This is a pathetic excuse for a nurse! If she is willing to curse a pt under her breath in front of you, what might she do if you werent there? Giving 9PM meds at 6PM is also inexcusable, and against every regulation in the book. You mentioned that you dont want to be a tattletail, but orienting with this type of nurse is worse than not orienting at all. You dont want to be her "friend" anyway, because she is a pathetic excuse for a human being. Tell your mgmt that you wish to not train under these people.
It is normal to feel that you dont know anything, but certainly have no reverence for these idiots. In a few months you will likely surpass them, while providing dignity to your patients, and not nursing like a criminal.
The good nurse you trained with does not look at you as an inconvenience. Request to work all her shifts.
PM me if you have any questions regarding nursing or anything else, and i will gladly help you.:)

im really considering going to my supervisor on monday. i just dont want to burn bridges so early on, because some of the nurses are knowledgable and i dont want to look like im stirring the pot. HOWEVER, i dont want to jeopardize anyones safety learning something the wrong way. thank you so much :)

lorenwithano · Feb 27, 2009

Hi,
First let me say, I feel for you. My first RN nursing job (I went straight to RN, never was an LPN first) was in a long term care facility. I had to work while I was still in school getting my NP so I took the job. The nurses there sound very similar to the ones I worked with. Report was usually just gossiping. They actually wanted me to pass meds though so they didn't have to do any of their own work and could sit around and chat. Some of the nurses orienting me would get mad if I asked which residents needed their meds crushed in applesauce, or who liked ice in their water versus who didn't...because they knew the residents preferences I thought I should ask, but they usually just got annoyed. The CNAs didn't speak much English so that was hard too. It was a really hard job for me.
One time when I was doing the whole med pass for the first time I noticed that they hadn't been giving one of the residents the right dosage of his beta blocker, they had been giving him two times the prescribed dosage, and because the facility was too cheap to buy a pill scorer, they wouldn't cut the pill in half, so they'd just been giving him twice as much. I pointed this out to the nurse and she wanted me to just give him the whole pill but I couldn't in good faith purposelly do a med error. She wanted me to just do it and hide it. But never forget, if you are giving the med, it is YOUR LICENSE on the line, not the supervising nurses. I reported the issue to the director of nursing and the orienting nurse was really really mad at me for the whole rest of the week. But you do what you have to do to protect patient safety and to protect what yo uhave worked so hard for.
Don't feel bad if long term care and rehab isn't for you. It's a hard job for anyone. I would highly recommend you finish and get your RN, it will open up many more opportunities for you. I did home health care for a while after the nursing home (I quit after like 8 weeks) and liked home health care a lot more...the only thing there is that I didn't feel totally confident as a new grad by myself, without other nurses or docs around if something went wrong you just have to call the paramedics. But keep looking, don't give up your hope, find a different job if you can. And finish the RN! You won't regret it. Good luck! Keep smiling! You are not alone. Every nurse has had some kind of a terrible work place experience.

i can only imagine what its like to go straight for your RN... scary! im an LPN and im driving to work shaking everyday! i wasnt a CNA first, went straight into an LPN program, so its all been a culture shock to me. sounds silly, but if you've never worked in the health care field, sometimes you feel like a fish out of water. i actually have the same problem you mentioned. very minute... but the nurse who DID let me pass meds didnt give me a list of who was crush, whole, applesauce, pudding, water... whatever, and when i asked she just huffed and puffed and acted like i was asking so much of her. i thought about homecare... im not sure what im going to do yet (i too feel a little scared about being by myself RIGHT AWAY... i still have a million and one questions). i will probably wait it out for a few weeks and see how i do on my own. thank you for sharing with me :)

lorenwithano · Feb 27, 2009

i would just like to state that i am a new grad rn in a hospital and i have come in contact with some of the behaviors you have described (it is not only the ills of ltc). my last preceptor was a disaster as a preceptor but a good nurse. she too ignored me most for the shift and did not let me do anything when i was not licensed. she treated me like dirt... i was treated better as a tech! the only way i got to do anything was being assertive (like you). however, when i did, i got criticized as if i was doing everything wrong. twice i intervened when patients were not doing well (and in one case it may have saved his life) but i got criticized for overreacting!
not to mention that she undermined all of my decisions to cnas even minor ones like getting patients vitals after the cna asked if i needed them! in some cases she took all the patients and assigned me none... in other cases she took the higher acuity patients and assigned me patients that can go home... in the cases where i had patients who were pretty much waiting to leave, i helped other nurses out and even the techs (this too upset her because she felt like i was neglecting something... i never was... i was always caught up with the little work she gave me).
when i got my license she still did not talk to me much..!! it took an hour to be assigned a patient after getting report on one shift (you can imagine that i was behind)!!! i always made sure to communicate patient needs etc. and always tried to be respectful with or without my lisence. however, my preceptor was very sensitive and emotional and unless i made it clear i was trying to be respectful, she took everything i said wrong!!! if i asked a question she thought i was questioning her nursing judgment. it was bad!!! like you, i know it is not me because i worked with other nurses when she was off and i had no problems. people were happy to work with me and were upset that i was not working with him/her on the next shift.
anyway, i chalk it up to personality problems. and so, when i was asked recently how my orientation was going i was honest and fair. we just do not click! i now have a new preceptor who i am told has precept for over 10 years. plus, my new preceptor's style is to treat me like i am not on orientation so i have a feel of reality. i can make decisions and not have them undermined, but have a support system of orientation at the same time. so i am allowed to think and provide patient care to high acuity patients while orienting. if i have questions i am told that i can ask! plus, communication is good. i cannot wait to work my next shift, unlike the feeling of dread i had with my last preceptor.
my suggestion to you is take the high road and let your don know that you do not click well with the two nurses you have and you request the nurse that you are able to work with.... dons want to keep their new grads; this is why they hired you in the first place. gl!

like i replied to bradleyrn, i am considering going to my don... its just i dont want to burn bridges and have other nurses think i am starting trouble. i cant help it if i have a thousand questions, but its my tush on the line now and i have to do what i feel is right. oh, and i didnt mention before,... the cnas at this facility even give me trouble! one of them has been there for 17 years, and whenever i try to help her out with something she asks me "what are you doing?!!?!".... its just so frsutrating. similiar to the nurse giving you patients who were about to go home... one of those awful orientators gave me a patient who was leaving the next day to go home, and all i had to do with her was a survey related to her care at the facility. sigggh. its just scary. i want to make it work, so im going to give it some time. but your right, for most people its personality problems! i dont want to steal their shifts or date the staff... i just want to work the hours they give me, get the expierience, and get the hell out! thank you again.

lorenwithano · Feb 27, 2009

I feel empathy for the feelings you are expressing. Starting any new job is overwhelming, now multiply that times 10 for nurses. First reassure yourself you will get it. Knowing your drugs and labs will come. It takes making a note to yourself of each medication you are not familiar with or lab test. Then looking them up either when you have time at work or while at home. 30 years and I still run up against medications I am not familiar with. This is on going for nurses. I keep a clip board with a thin piece of card board in it just for my list of unfamiliar meds, this helps me to memorize them.
As to the nurses who are orientating you. If possible request to work with then nurse whom you admire. I do not feel this is unreasonable.
As to this job does not feel like your niche. I have hated my first job for a year. I hated my current job for a year. Why did I hate them? I felt like a duck out of water, I felt I did not know enough. This too passes. In time I loved both of my jobs as I gained confidence in my skills and the skills of my co-workers. It does take time.
It will get better. Use your time away from work to think of how to improve what you need while at work. Take out your books and refresh yourself on common procedures you most likely will run up against in your job. Take out your drug book. List the most common drugs you will be giving.

many of my teachers in nursing school said i would be uncomfortable for about a year. i knew all my labs in school, now i look at labs and look confused. but i do exactly what you say, and on the weekends i read as much as i can. its just been hard because i orient five days a week so i dont have much time to review but i do what i can. im mostly worried about the meds and insulin. meds i can learn, insulin just scares me. but thank you for your words of advice :)

lpnflorida · Feb 27, 2009

lepspn,

I forgot to mention, I stayed at my first job for 20 years, my second job I am still there after 10 years. Sometimes , I think we learn to love that which we master and of course the patients. It is was has kept me going, those wonderful and somedays the not so wonderful patients.

SummerGarden, BSN, MSN, RN · Feb 28, 2009

, i am considering going to my don... its just i dont want to burn bridges and have other nurses think i am starting trouble.

you won't be... honestly approach your don and let her know that you work better with nurse x as oppose to y and z. in fact, you think nurses y and z are good nurses "blah blah blah" but you feel like you have a better connection with nurse x and are doing better with your orientation when you work with him/her. this should not burn any bridges because you are not putting down any of the other nurses. people are people... we do not all get along! besides, some people should never precept! of course, you don't tell your don the latter.

btw, i forgot to mention that on numerous occasions i had to sit through idol gossip about nurses etc. i do not know of or care anything about during report (again, i am in the hospital setting). so i know the feeling of being out of place or feeling stupid because you hear stuff you are not suppose to be hearing. thankfully, my new preceptor is all business!! :up: gl!