To tell or not to tell? Opinions please!

icunurse42066 · Sep 30, 2008

You can never go wrong by being honest, and I'm sure that your NM will respect you for it and understand your situation if you'll explain it to her. Who knows, she may give you the position anyway. Just be honest. Good luck and my best for your mother

nrsang97, BSN, RN · Sep 30, 2008

Just be honest. Let her know that you may have to move out west to be closer to your mom due to her health issues. Your NM should respect you for being honest and up front with her on this issue. Good luck to you and best wishes for your mom.

HonestRN · Oct 1, 2008

I would be honest with your NM WHEN your decision to move or not is final. It is barely October, a lot can change between now and December.

Noryn · Oct 1, 2008

What is the Golden Rule? Be truthful!

IngyRN · Oct 1, 2008

I would not say anything until your plans are definite. You don't want to burn bridges. However, be prepared, although your NM may seem nice, she may not like the idea of training and hiring you for only 6months.

SunnyAndrsn · Oct 1, 2008

I would not say anything at this point. I don't agree that this is an honesty issue. If you are asked to sign a contract for a specific amount of time, that would be a different issue all together. Who knows what the future holds? What if in 6 months (without the issue of moving), another job presented itself that was better? Would you feel obligated to stay b/c you'd only been there 6 months and this NM gave you job right out of school?

Nope, keep your personal plans personal.

DH disclosed to his employer that he was going back to school. This was three years ago (we are year 2 in a phd program now). This is a total job change, chemistry to psychology. Obviously, he won't stay in this job. Although he still works there (part time as of the end of the summer) guess who has not had a decent raise in the last 3 years? Guess who is looked over for choice assignments? Guess who can't go to conferences?

Yeah, he really wished he wouldn't have said anything. He was an underpaid slave to the company for the last three years.

I have sort of a dilemma right now and would appreciate any insight you could offer. I am a RN student getting ready to graduate in December. I'm currently a LPN and have worked on my med-surg unit for over a year. I love the people I work with as well as my nurse manager and was planning to stay on this unit following graduation. Here's where the dilemma comes in... I live in the south and my mother, who is not in the best of health, lives out west. She's been having alot of health trouble lately and I am strongly considering moving to be closer to her sometime around May or June of next year. My nurse manager has already told me that she will find a RN position for me in December, but that was before I knew I would most likely be moving. My gut feeling from an honesty standpoint is that I need to tell her my plans before I take the position. I don't feel that it would be right to waste her time and the money it takes to put me through orientation if I know I'll be leaving after a short period of time. But at the same time, I want to get some experience in a RN position before I move. So I'm not sure the best way to go about this... Has anybody had a similar problem or just an idea. I welcome any and all suggestions. Thanks!! :)

abracadabra2886 · Oct 1, 2008

Thanks to everyone for the advice. I agree that alot could happen between now and December, but I've been contemplating the idea for a while now. Only time will tell... Thanks again! :)

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Oct 1, 2008

Well, there is a chance that I will have to move back downstate because my parents are failing. I don't want to but if necessary I will do my duty and go. My boss is aware of this and I know she appreciates the honesty. I gives us the opportunity to make sure that we are all cross-trained on my functions - which we should be anyway - and should I leave she will not feel that I misled her into paying for training that will not benfit the facility.

gonzo1, ASN, RN · Oct 1, 2008

I don't think you should share your personal plans, or problems with your employer. If you like the position take it and do your best.

Anything can happen between now and then. Maybe something would happen that your mom would move by you. Then you wouldn't be moving.

If and when the time comes that you must leave just make sure that at that time you let them know you are leaving to help your family, and hope that you can return at some time in the future.

Honesty is always the best policy, but this is not a case of honesty, but trying to foretell the future, which is absolutely impossible to do. None of us can know what the future holds. So I would do what is appropriate for this day, and deal with the future if and when you need too.