The struggle of being a Mom and keeping a career

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I am in need of a little help deciding what to do for my career. I will try to make this as short as possible!

I graduated in 2009. My husband is in the military, so we have to deal with special circumstances that typical families do not such as having no family/friend support and moving often. We moved from Hawaii to San Diego about three weeks after graduation in 2009. As many of you know Southern CA is one of the worst places to be for a new grad with no connections to find a job. I worked anything I could such as flu and wellness clinics got into home care. The home care position ended after 6 months due to the company having financial and ethical problems. I eventually landed a job that was sort of like a traveling occupational health nurse for the government and large corporations. I knew it wasn't going to go anywhere, but the hours and pay were great. My husband and I started a family, so balancing family has made things so much harder. That position ended up working out very well since it was PRN.

We just moved to a new state, my husband will be gone most of the three years we are here and I am due with my second child in March. I am VERY torn between keeping a career and staying at home with my kids.

I have always dreamed of working in a position that involved bedside care (in a hospital or outpatient). I have been looking at jobs in my new state and many of them want acute care experience. I did find a position at a major hospital in town that was for med surg and stated they would train;however, the position is for full time. (Finding that post is what started this inner turmoil about working) Unfortunately, the day care for the military only runs from 630am to 630pm. Not enough hours a day for me to work a 12 hour shift. (Daycare for military is $2-4 an hour whereas civilian is $10-15per hour). I could hire a nanny, but I don't trust people enough in my home alone with my child to do that. Maybe I can get a clinic job somewhere? I will have to see.

My main problem though is feeling as though I should be at home with my kids and also be working as a nurse. We don't "need" the money, I would work for extra. I feel as though I can justify leaving my kids a couple days a week to satisfy the need to be a nurse and have a career. It will be very hard getting them into a daycare since the area where we moved is unique. In daycare they will no doubt be sick a lot and with no one else to help me and I can foresee having to call in sick to my work to care for my kids. Seems like I want to have my cake and eat it too!! I have a lot to work through to be satisfied with my decision of to work or not. When I have baby #2 in March life will once again change dramatically, so that is another factor.

My major questions....

Do you struggle with balancing your career and raising a family? Do you have a feeling like me that you must be a super mom and work as a nurse?

I am 4 years out of school with no "real" experience. If I decided to take a break and raise my kids will I ever be marketable to an employer?

How should I go about keeping my skills up and keep myself marketable to an employer? CEUs and certification classes?

I hope this wasn't too confusing!! I REALLY appreciate your thoughts as I am really struggling to make the right decision for me and my family.

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Sorry about all the inserted text...I have no idea why it did that!

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Specializes in Vents, Telemetry, Home Care, Home infusion.

AN moved to all black text 1 yr ago --edited color from post

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AN moved to all black text 1 yr ago --edited color from post

Thank you for fixing the post!!!

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I was in a similar situation a couple years ago so I chose to do public health, and I love it. The hours and working conditions are great. I do CEU's online and if my kids are sick I have a sitter that comes over if I can't take the day off.

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Specializes in Public Health, L&D, NICU.

If you have a chance to stay home with your kids, I would do it. Those years will be over quickly, and you can never get them back. Maybe keep your eyes open for something part time?

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When I wanted to get out of the 12 hour shift/holidays/nights/weekends rat race, I applied (in person) to a stand alone GI lab (it does colonoscopies/endoscopies, etc.). I work PRN, usually 2 days a week. I work IF and WHEN I feel like it. It keeps me active in the profession, but is not overwhelming. Our hours are usually 6-2:30 or 7:00-3:30. These types of centers are opening up all over the place. My DON loves the PRN nurses because we don't get benefits.

Check it out and see if there is something along these lines in your area. I had no GI experience when I applied, but I did have ICU experience and knew several of the doctors who own this facility.

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That's a tough position. Myself I would prob do something part time within the day care hours. It's good for you have some interaction with adults while your husband is deployed but full time might be too much time from the kids.. (?) overall in the big picture any experience is good experience and the acute care can.come later if that the way it needs to be for now.. ..I'm in the same career boat without "acute" care experience but I have a very rewarding position with medically fragile kids .. I think after working here now I'd prob qualify to work acute but not sure i even care if I ever do anymore : )

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Specializes in Psych ICU, addictions.

Since you're military, contact your branch's childcare development center (CDC)--most military bases have a CDC office. From them, you can get listings of base childcare centers as well as in-home providers that are contracted by the military and have to meet their licensing standards.

Many of the military's in-home providers offer extended hours, some even offering overnights. I found a great one that I ended up using for 4 years before we had to PCS. She was able to accommodate my crazy school/work hours, especially when the better half was deployed.

Some military bases do have centers that provide 24-hour care, but to sign up for them you usually need a letter from your spouse's commander indicating that because of his job duties, you will need care outside of normal hours. It may not be at the base your spouse is assigned to, but a nearby base.

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Specializes in CMSRN.
Since you're military, contact your branch's childcare development center (CDC)--most military bases have a CDC office. From them, you can get listings of base childcare centers as well as in-home providers that are contracted by the military and have to meet their licensing standards.

Many of the military's in-home providers offer extended hours, some even offering overnights. I found a great one that I ended up using for 4 years before we had to PCS. She was able to accommodate my crazy school/work hours, especially when the better half was deployed.

Some military bases do have centers that provide 24-hour care, but to sign up for them you usually need a letter from your spouse's commander indicating that because of his job duties, you will need care outside of normal hours. It may not be at the base your spouse is assigned to, but a nearby base.

I was going to say things very similar to this. I'm not in the military but I know many that are and I think these are great ideas. I wish you the very best of luck in your search!

P.S. - thank you for the sacrifices you make as a military wife and please thank your husband for the work and sacrifices he makes. I come from a military family and have a great deal of respect for our men and women in the armed forces, as well as their families. My best thoughts are with you all!

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