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The best excuses for positive drug screens

Posted

Specializes in L&D Endo Pre-Op. Has 15 years experience.

I have recently had a lot of positive UDS pts, and the excuses I hear as to why they are positive simply blow my mind! Anyone have any good stories? I'll start with my favorites.....

+ marijuana: I was trapped in a car with 10 other people smoking and the windows were broken

+methamphetamine: I don't use it, I just cook it, and usually not at my own house

+cocaine: I was asleep, and my boyfriend blew it up my nose. The 2 gay men that live next to me put cocaine in their air vents, and it must have got into my apartment.

**my all-time favorite: well, of course my wife is positive for cocaine, you have no idea how many cokes she drinks everyday**

Anyone else??? :)

JustBeachyNurse, RN

Specializes in Complex pediatrics turned LTC/subacute geriatrics. Has 11 years experience.

Positive for barbiturates....I didn't inhale the smoke. Didn't realize that barbiturates are usually in pill form, but did you take any unknown pills? Yeah, but I thought they were vitamins. (Face palm.) sorry you are disqualified from the study. (I worked phase 1 clinical research at the time)

klone, MSN, RN

Specializes in Women's Health/OB Leadership. Has 15 years experience.

Why are you testing so many women for drugs? Just wondering the circumstances by which so many women are getting drug tested.

rnaturcervix

Specializes in L&D Endo Pre-Op. Has 15 years experience.

Unfortunately, the pt demographic where I work includes a lot of drug abusers. Some freely admit to using drugs, both before pregnancy and during. Our policy is to test any pt with prior use/abuse, as well as those with no prenatal care during their current pregnancy. The amount of positive screens blows my mind!

NicuGal, MSN, RN

Specializes in NICU, PICU, PACU. Has 30 years experience.

The dad just did heroin, then we had sex. That's why I'm positive!

SionainnRN

Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU. Has 5 years experience.

The dad just did heroin, then we had sex. That's why I'm positive!

One of the ER docs I work with was telling me that meth is found in semen and if ingested can make the UDS positive! Now I've actually looked that up to verify, but it did give me a chuckle!!

klone, MSN, RN

Specializes in Women's Health/OB Leadership. Has 15 years experience.

Do you test anyone that comes in in PTL or with abruption?

Does your state require consent from the patient before testing?

ChristineN, BSN, RN

Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.

Do you test anyone that comes in in PTL or with abruption?

Does your state require consent from the patient before testing?

I work in the ER and my state does not require consent for drug testing. Actually I have worked in several different states and never heard of anyone getting consent

Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

Do you test anyone that comes in in PTL or with abruption?

Does your state require consent from the patient before testing?

We test when there is PTL or an abruption. We aren't required to get a consent before testing, but in practice I tell the patient what I need the urine for and why. I've never had anyone refuse, but if they do I'll kick it up the food chain to the docs.

klone, MSN, RN

Specializes in Women's Health/OB Leadership. Has 15 years experience.

I work in the ER and my state does not require consent for drug testing. Actually I have worked in several different states and never heard of anyone getting consent

It's possible that in the ED, there are different laws. I've worked in 2 states, and in both states, we were required to get patient consent for a UDS. For infants, we did not need consent, only a physician's order. But for adult patients, you can not do a drug screen unless they give permission.

rnaturcervix

Specializes in L&D Endo Pre-Op. Has 15 years experience.

I've worked in Texas my whole career, and we've never needed consent. We are also required to file a report with CPS (child protective services) for all positive screens. As far as PTL and abruptions go, it's not something that is done routinely unless there is past history or a very strong suspicion. I have actually had a pt ask if her abruption could have been caused by the cocaine she used that day. Hmmmm.....

brillohead, ADN, RN

Specializes in Cardio-Pulmonary; Med-Surg; Private Duty. Has 5 years experience.

IMO, it should be a standard test for all pregnant women... if the child's development has been compromised by maternal drug use, that's info that, as a healthcare provider, I would want to have at my disposal. Likewise if I'm going to be caring for a newborn who is going through withdrawal.

OrganizedChaos, LVN

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab. Has 10 years experience.

I could understand not knowing one was positive for barbiturates. I was given a pain med, took a drug screen & popped positive for barbs. It turned out the pain med I was prescribed had barbiturates in it.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN

Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia. Has 40 years experience.

Poppy seed muffins!

Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

Poppy seed muffins!

I've always wondered exactly how many poppy seeds/muffins one would have to eat to pop a + opiates; knowing my rotten luck I'd be one of those slow metabolizers that would be + on Saturday for a muffin I ate on Monday. That would defy the half-lives of most opiates but I'm not taking any chances. ROFL

what would you do if a client expressly refused to be tested?

I've worked in Texas my whole career, and we've never needed consent. We are also required to file a report with CPS (child protective services) for all positive screens. As far as PTL and abruptions go, it's not something that is done routinely unless there is past history or a very strong suspicion. I have actually had a pt ask if her abruption could have been caused by the cocaine she used that day. Hmmmm.....

klone, MSN, RN

Specializes in Women's Health/OB Leadership. Has 15 years experience.

IMO, abruption and preterm delivery should always be cause for requesting a test.

rnaturcervix

Specializes in L&D Endo Pre-Op. Has 15 years experience.

what would you do if a client expressly refused to be tested?

That would have to fall on the doctor's shoulders!