Telling Patients/Residents You Love Them?

[robynnel]

I recently started working in a LTC memory care/dementia/alzheimer's unit and last week we had an inservice on caring for patients/residents and during that inservice we were told that our facility encourages you to say the patient/residents' name regularly and also tell them that you love them every day because it brings them joy. Would you feel comfortable telling a resident/patient you love them? I am just trying to get other opinions because others I work with said it sounds odd. (I should add: I am one of three people who work full-time on my unit, everyone else is part-time or PRN so I am usually on the unit 5-6 days a week and have very strong bonds with my residents, so telling them I love them isn't really an issue for me).

[MindfulMSWRN]

I think there are ways to communicate you care for patients, but "I love you" just isn't one of them for me. Authentic connection and patient-centered care are so important, but telling people you love them seems inappropriate and honestly- IMO it's more about the person saying it and their needs, not about the patient and what they need. That's a problematic path to wander down.

[nursejoy1, ASN, RN]

I believe this should be an individual choice. I work in LTC and have for many years. I absolutely have had residents that I truly loved, as I had cared for them for years. And I routinely told them so.

I also have had residents that thought I was their daughter, or granddaughter and tell me they love me. I usually say it back, because they want to hear it from the person they think I am. It truly makes a difference in how their day goes.

That being said, I do it by choice and would never expect someone else to follow suit "just because". It should not be a policy.

[Libby1987]

My first knee jerk response was no, not therapeutic, but then I don't work with this population. An isolated confused geriatric can never be told they are loved? Put that way, it's heinous to think the staff would refuse.

I honestly think this question would be best posed in the LTC forum, it's too different from other areas of nursing and you are getting opinions from nurses who don't work months/years with the same patients with severe dementia and its manifestations.