Stuck between a job I love and a place I love?

Nurses General Nursing

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Hello all,

I am a relatively newer nurse who recently accepted a position several states away from my home state at a large academic medical center. The job was essentially my dream job-- I see an acuity of patients that I would perhaps not see anywhere else and in a specialty I love. Alas, I have been in this new city with my significant other for a few months now and I long to move back home. The city I am from is familiar-- the people, share the same views as I and quite frankly are more educated. Also lower crime. RN job opportunities are not scarce where I am from, but there is no academic medical center like where I am currently working.

I am looking for opinions mostly, what is more important to you? Loving your career and every day that you go to work feeling fulfilled, challenged and excited? Or is it your days off when you enjoy the comfort and familiarity of a place with years of memories and live in an area with plenty of friends and family close by.

Has anyone else made a similar career decision?

Thanks for your responses,

RNingBSNing

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Specializes in ED, Pedi Vasc access, Paramedic serving 6 towns.

I was kinda in a similar position as you, but for the reasons you are stating chose not to move.

I live in the northeast and we have quite a number of academic medical centers, the problem is I wanted a pediatric job and the market here is saturated with nurses, and after applying for 8 plus years here with no luck the thought crossed my mind that it was time to move. My brother and SIL live in Ohio, and I was actually going to interview for a NICU job at a major hospital there because I just couldn't find what I thought was my "dream job" here. Most of my family is here in the north east close to where I live now, so I thought long and hard about that, and decided not to make the move. It sounded great in theory, working with babies, but then when I thought about how lonely it would end up being by myself essentially and not knowing anyone other than them (and I couldn't spend everyday with them, as they have their own social lives and need private time). I am also an introvert so I knew it would be very hard for me to make new friends and socialize, I also have very bad social anxiety so I cannot just go to a party or the bar and hang out!

You have the benefit of having a significant other so that probably helps a bit, BUT there is no replacement for close friends and family. You cannot replace them and you cannot take back the time you miss with them, especially if you have kids in the family. You are missing their milestones and the joy that comes with that, and other family events. In my opinion no job is worth missing that, and that is what I thought about before making a final decision. A job is something you do to make money, and yes you need to get some satisfaction from it, but that has a much lower level of importance when it comes to the people in your life. My advise is that take heart in knowing you were able to experience this job and cross it off the bucket list, but also follow your heart and your mind in this case, and do what your intuition is telling you to do.

Sometimes there is only one place that truly feels like "home".

FYI: Fast forward to now and I just received a job offer at a major children's hospital. So turns out, for now at least, staying put was the right decision!

Annie

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We can't decide for you.

I moved back to my home town area. I had "fantasies" of socializing with my friends and family.....it didn't work out that way. Sure we see each other from time to time but not as much as I fantasised. So of course I fantasise about I should have stayed where I was and tried harder to make a life there!

The grass is always greener on the other side...and the grass IS greener where you water it.

You've only been at your new job a few months. At the very least stay a year...and give your new town and maybe new friendships a chance.

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The grass is always greener on the other side...and the grass IS greener where you water it.

You've only been at your new job a few months. At the very least stay a year...and give your new town and maybe new friendships a chance.

I agree 100%. Get to know your new town before you make a leap. Join a club, be a tourist in your own city, get involved with other things besides work-home-bed-sleep. A dream job in this field is hard to come by.

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Specializes in Emergency, Telemetry, Transplant.
We can't decide for you.

Exactly. I moved away from home after nursing school. After a trip home to visit family, I realized how much I missed them. I moved back. I think how things could have been different if I stayed in this different city (it really was a great job); however, I have no regrets about moving home. None of us can ever tell you which is more important to you. Good luck with your decision and moving forward.

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Specializes in Med/Surge, Psych, LTC, Home Health.

I agree to give the new job and city some time. You moved there for a

reason. You are feeling homesick and that's perfectly normal. That

will get better with time.

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