Sick and exhausted

[DesertKat]

So in January I was promoted to nurse manager so all sorts if long hours and steep learning curves insued- which I expected. What I did not expect was that once I became salaried, I also became the hospital lackey. I had to take all the overtime and extra shifts that came up (since they didn't have to actually pay me the overtime) and there were a lot because we had nurses dropping like flies. So here I was with a full schedule charging and I was still responsible for all the duties of a nurse manager on top of it. Next thing I know, my husband and I find out that I was pregnant. I didn't get any slack in hours, in fact the situation got worse and when I told them I couldn't do it, I was basically told to suck it up because that was my job as nurse manager.

This week I had a miscarriage and was actually told that I had to suck it up and come in anyway. And in my state, I actually did! So there I am, sobbing and ubable to function when guess who joins the play- Joint. At which point I was told by my boss to suck it up and get onto the floor. The risk manager and hr ladies were there and were actually pressuring me to get onto the floor, too. The only reason I left was because my nurses got together and worked up a way for me to leave and the night nurse stayed for my shift. Now, fast forward a bit and today I find out that my boss told the nurses that I was just bleeding a bit and I was being hysterical and preventing everyone from doing their jobs. I may be a psych nurse, but I damn well can recognize a miscarriage when I see one.

I am so ****** beyond reason that I have to fight every day not to walk out in the middle of my shift. I hate it because my patients are suffering and so is the rest of my team. I quit as nurse manager, but I have no idea if there is any recourse I have against the hospital. I can't imagine anyone else having to go through what I just did. I am currently job hunting, but I still want to protect my team of nurses as I best able.

[enlightenedprincess]

Im sorry you had to go trough that. I am a rn nurcing student and one thing i get reminded of constantly when im stessed out is that my health is very important (relax). I think you should have called your husband when you found out about your unfortunate miscarriage. But when your stresses decisions become harder. I say look for employment away from a hospital were you can be relaxed calm and live a healthier life for your self and husband. You've already gotten through school your knowledge is permanent, useful and high in value. You're probably thinking about the pay now. It will be slightly less put you cant put a price on your health. Practice makes perfect. Maby you need to work on communications, time management, ect. You can work on your deficiencies there and become stronger with your career in time.

[DesertKat]

Forgot the part where I couldn't reach my husband because he is Air Force and they were in the middle of an exercise.

Time management has nothing to do with being assigned every shift that another nurse turned down or finding my name penciled into the schedule for a double without even being called about it. Or being scheduled to charge for 54 hours a week because I'm the nurse they don't have to pay overtime on. I don't have deficiencies I need to "work on", thanks. What I did have was a situation in which I was expected to conduct two full time jobs at the same time.

[MBrnbsnmha/ed]

DesertKat, I would like to express my sorrow for the loss of the baby. Secondly, your managers and superiors in this situation are unkind and inhumane in my eyes, yes, were are trained to render care to the sick, but at times nurses also become sick or have health issues that arise. Working so many hours a week on a salaried pay scale is not worth it and the facility appears to be taking "advantage" of the situation. How can you possibly give safe care working so many hours? I understand that your are support of your staff and may want to consider prn status there until you embark on a new oppurtunity to have some income for the mean while and decide how you would like to move forward. It seems you did the best thing for your licensure and health by stepping away from the position, because working in such a high stress setting would make it difficult for any woman to carry a child to term. Kudos to you for stepping away. I encountered a similiar experience as a ADON where I felt abused by working 50-55 hours a week salaried and got the blame for majority of the issues taking place with nursing. Not to mention I was "expected" to perform three other job descriptions but I would get one pay check every other week, I left that position without second thoughts.

[Sparrowhawk]

They are taking way advantage of you! So sorry this happened ((hugs)) Maybe it's time to look for another job?

[DesertKat]

Oh, I am looking and trying to maintain my professionalism. My staff and the doctors I work with are being very supportive, which is a huge blessing. I was relieved to walk away from the management position and my husband is as well- maybe we can actually see each other while awake again!

I just hate to think of anyone else going through this in the future. And as a manager I also wonder what the heck they were thinking anyway. I've sent home nurses for less and with Joint I wonder how that interview would have gone with me crying the entire time!

[MouseMichelle]

I've been offered many times a DON position and your post is the exact reason I don't do it. I've never seen a DON last longer than say 5 years. I'm surprised mine has lasted 4 years. She was the DSD and was very nice then, but since DON OMG the evil side has taken over. Not to say you were evil I'm just saying the stress of that job causes people to change and I wouldn't take that job for all the money in the world...seriously.

Michelle

[Mulan]

Sorry for your loss.

Recourse? What type of recourse do you want? Are you talking legal as in they were responsible for the miscarriage? Slander? A call to an attorney can answer that for you.

I can understand the anger. If you have no legal recourse, I would just let it go. Let go of the anger, just go in and put in your scheduled hours and get your pay. There is probably nothing you can do about any of it, and they are not going to change.

Your anger is not hurting them.

[DesertKat]

No, nothing legal. I wouldn't have a leg to stand on even if I did want to sue. I guess I just want them to recognize exactly how tenuous their position was and how easily it could have lead to a major lawsuit. I think they seriously need to rethink their position on staffing and refusing to hire agency nurses. I doubt I could have a major effect, but what happened doesn't make sense on any level- staffing, morale or legally.

I doubt I can do anything other then eventually walk away once I have a solid employment offer. Heck, I'd even go back to teaching highschool if I can't find anything better (I live in a small city without many options).

[canoehead, BSN, RN]

No, nothing legal. I wouldn't have a leg to stand on even if I did want to sue. I guess I just want them to recognize exactly how tenuous their position was and how easily it could have lead to a major lawsuit.

They don't CARE! That says volumes about them though, not you.

Work for the money, and for what you can do for the patients. Try to ignore the paperwork and crap that comes with the organization. Move on if they start to target you.

[pedicurn, LPN, RN]

Desertkat,

So sorry for your loss and terrible experience at work.

I can't believe how inhumane your supervisors are.

What sort of people behave like that??

I'm am trying to understand their behaviour.

if they had to hire agency ... then what would happen? Would the managers be cautioned or be fired?? Would they simply lose their bonuses?

Is desperation the root cause of such inhumane managerial behaviour ??

[juzme]

DesertKat,

I am sorry for your loss Kat. It is terrible how management is the ruination of many a good nurse! Please take care of yourself.