Rude Family Member - Advice?

[katyperryfan]

I really need advise. I had a patients family member be just awful and rude to me. Patients BP was low, so some of the patients meds were held per team. When the family member later came, the patients HR intermittently went higher than their baseline. With the family members former medical background, they demanded the doctor be spoken to. (Which I was already planning on) When I came back, it was not sufficient and I was berated and talked down to. When she was done, she smiled and padded my shoulder, making sure to remind me constantly that she wasn't trying to insult me. In our line of work, we are used to this sort of treatment, heck, I get it all the time too, but this time it felt different and I cannot stop thinking about it. Couldn't sleep well last night. Now I'm lying in my bed, trying to take a nap and all I can picture in my head is what happened and how I was forced to smile, nod, and do whatever they demanded. I just need advise on how I can stop thinking about it and/or how to deal with situations like this.

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

On 3/12/2020 at 10:05 PM, jobellestarr said:

When someone acts snarky, I wait until they’re done talking and raise my eyebrows slightly. As in “are you done now” and then go about my work as if nothing happened.

What does snarky mean?

The method you suggest would make me feel I had not been heard by you.

Does the method you suggest work well?

[jobellestarr]

34 minutes ago, Kooky Korky said:

What does snarky mean?

The method you suggest would make me feel I had not been heard by you.

Does the method you suggest work well?

What does snarky mean? It means rude. And yes, they know that I heard them and that their response was rude. Rudeness does not require an answer. 

[hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I]

On 3/12/2020 at 9:40 AM, katyperryfan said:

I just need advise on how I can stop thinking about it and/or how to deal with situations like this.

Over 20 years in recovery through the 12 steps have helped me to deal with this type of situation/thought process. What I have learned is it is OK to feel a certain way about any given set of circumstances. AA has taught me to sit quietly with my feelings and incorporating deep breathing objectively examine them. Then I can take was useful and put it aside for future thought and purge what's not helpful from my thinking. It takes a lot of practice but is so worth it.

I use to be a world record holding ruminator and insomniac. I could fret over just about anything. But like @Davey Do I find that deep breating and focusing on a calming and repetative thought helps to untangle the thoughts and feelings and allow for rest and then sleep. That an a cup of warm almond milk steeped with ginger and tumeric allows for total relaxation and drifting off to restful sleep. 

Hppy