Relationships with Docs

I was just talking to my wife's friend, ~10yr experience and recent NP grad, and she says the same. She claimed male doctors tend to be more friendly with male nurses, perhaps asking them to play golf, etc.

shirley, yes some doc's are .edited and may try to intimidate and bully you...

i've personally never been the recipient of any such mistreatment. some of the nurses i work with swear it's because i'm male. maybe they're right. i dont know.

anyway, my only advice to you is not to worry about these guys. they're either unhappy people, don't like being doctors, or are just plain edited ...and they have no real power over how you feel....thats all up to you.

stand tall and dont cower before their 'md' title...they're people just like you.

as you grow as a nurse and gain confidence in your abilities, these same edited -head doc's will start to seem almost comical/stupid in how they conduct themselves.

(as an aside, these dummy-docs are a small minority..most arent that way)

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and on the flip-side.... it's been my observation that the nurses who get the best treatment by the docs arent male, but rather the younger, prettier female variety. they may not get asked to play golf, but they're certainly invited to other .....events.

and it's funny to see the nurses who know they're pretty. they can really work these docs.. (a innocent giggle here, a batting eyelash there..., etc.) some of these girls have honed their abilities to such razor-sharpness, that they get these guys acting like 8th-grade school-boys. what a joke!

doenst matter if these girls are cement-heads....just so long as they play like they're interested...sheesh.

ah well, i suppose thats just life.

Originally posted by Dinith88 It's been my observation that the nurses who get the BEST treatment by the Docs arent male, but rather the younger, prettier female variety.

I could see that case happening, especially in the university-type hospitals. Hopefully those are the single docs, otherwise their wives will take them to the proverbial cleaners.

My best experience is with docs in ER. Since we literally work side-by-side for 12 hours, they learn to trust you more so that the multiple docs who have patients in other places in the hospital. Their contact with individual nurses is often brief and days or weeks may go by between those contacts. I have worked ICU and the docs who put the most patients in will get to know the nurses well, but the doc who only occasionally puts a patient in may or may not know the nurses well enough to treat them with respect. We have to earn their respect, just like they have to earn ours.

In seventeen years of nursing, I've only met THREE doctors who had personalities of a skunk. (nice way of putting it)

Not a bad number considering how many docs seventeen years of nursing brought into my path.

Unfortunately, if we don't KISS all docs butts, we get written up and cast out as if we have NEVER gotten along with a doc our entire career. Again........this bashing down of nurses can only continue as long as Nurse Managers continue kissing up to docs that behave that way...continuing to allow their own nursing staff to suffer because of those FEW docs that get the jaws over stupid crap.

Thanx for all the replies. I start working in the MICU as a student care partner in a few weeks and will be at the bottom of the barrel but it's okay. The experience will serve me well in the future. I've just read a tread on the student doc forum and it was quite shameful. Of course these are young arrogant med students but most seem to think nurses are"stupid" quote. But I'm glad to see that alot of you have had decent experiences with doc.... Thanx again for the input.

Shirley

I have seen more rns being mean to the residents than the other way around. That means that you have been an ICU nurse too long. And they don't make pleasant suggestions either (if they think something should have been done/ ordered differently).....they just rip them apart in front of the attending, anyone..they don't care.

I have dealt with many different doctors, cardio, pulmo, GP's, surgeons etc... Most of them are very nice and have treated me well. I do ask the doctor questions when they are in my unit and some are much better at explaining things than others. Some I know will take the time and others I know won't. By far, the grouchiest are the surgeons. They are up in the OR at dawn and trying to cover the house in between cases and they are always in a hurry. In my experience, the doctors that are called mean are "mean" to everyone. It is their personality. I have never been singled out. You will learn how each physician is and what they expect fom you and then you can try to avoid any problems. Most importantly, when you do have to interact with a doc who you think is behaving badly, don't take it personally.

Gator

It depends on the personality of the doctor. Our CV surgeons feel that God should bow down to them, so not many people get along with the CV guys and we try to have as little to do with them as possible.

Our Trauma surgeons vary quite a deal. One I am good friends with outside of the hospital and have vacationed with he and his wife, another TS and I got called into my directors "naughty room" because we had a falling out when he told me he didn't think I knew what I was doing......another long story.

I have found though that the doc's who are the most skilled (excluding CV surgeons who do amazing things in their own right) and that I have seen manage patients medical care in a way that is no less than miraculous are some of the most down to earth, caring and compassionate...i.e. our medical director of ICU and one of our best nephrologists.

Now, the residents, that's a completely different story. They have the abiltiy to determine how great of an experience they have while taking care of ICU patients, piss off the ICU nurse once by talking down to them and you may just get phone call at 0300 for a potassium of 3.4;)

Some of the best advice I've ever heard an attending give to the resident is...."listen to your nurse and what they are telling you. They have the ability to make your life a living hell if you deserve it":devil: :)

I think the opposite is true too though. I've seen nurses who are incredibly intelligent speak very negatively to residents, even saw one cry once....I think that there should be a shared respect amongst the professions. You treat me right and I'll treat you right...

I think it depends on the docs. There are a few of the Ob-gyns that are just great to work with. One of the gyn's told me after the surgery that the IV I started was a great site and he really appreciated my approach. I thought it was nice he noticed, no one else ever does. And he told me where to take my next vacation.

Also, the peds docs are usually pretty nice. One of the pediatricians will give me updates on how some of the patients I have cared for are doing. I really appreciate that, cause after they leave the hospital, I often wonder. Very easygoing bunch.

Family practice and renal MD's are also cool to call at 0200 in the morning, and easygoing enough to joke around with and actually ask for how the patient's night went.

Who I don't like calling is one of the oncs (although last night I got revenge. Pt was NPO for CT, but getting po pre-meds. Pt had a fever, and I called for the OK to give tylenol d/t NPO status. Honestly, I forgot about the premeds being po, and was just thinking of his NPO status) And, I also hate calling this one particular doc...he hung up on me when I called him about BP's over 200 systolic and a decreased, bloody urinary output before I finished my first sentence....I wrote up an issue of concern

UUUGGGGHHHHHHHHH!

surgeons!

i find pediatric docs have the most patience, and willing to answer "stupid" questions--

they'd rather you ask, than pretend to know

i find cardiac surgeons, ok ANY surgeon ARROGANT, and difficult to approach(i guess they are so tired by the time i see them)

i work in a medical center, so no worries about calling someone at home to wake them--they are usually in the next room...

you must be confident in your abilities/knowledge---predators try to get the wounded animal first...