Published Feb 3, 2008
Stringer
20 Posts
Hi all,
I'm Stringer, and my primary qualification is narcotics addict, but as most of you probably know, the addictive mind won't turn down many opportunities to include just about any repeatable behavior into the web. My experience includes alcohol and nicotine.
My sobriety dates from August of 2000, but I turned myself in originally in 1995. Subsequently I failed Diversion for financial reasons and successfully finished the probation track for clearing my license about a year ago.
You can tell from the brief time line sketched above that it has been a long hard journey. To add a complicating factor, my wife is also a recovering RN who is almost done with her probation track.
There was a period of time where it appeared that we might lose everything, and we had 4 children at the time. We lost our 12 year old son to brain cancer at a time we were both in relapse. We lost just about everything, but I'm not able to tell the whole story here.
For me, the keys to success have been and continue to be:
1) Keep coming back, especially to your Higher Power, no matter how much you love your "sins" and loathe to give them up, no matter how entrenched you are in compulsions and their attendant lies. He/She/It/They will no more reject you than you would reject your son or daughter who finds themselves in a long siege.
2) Keep coming back to your associations with people who will support you and who can pull your covers.
3) 12 Steps over and over with an experienced sponsor.
The onion peeling metaphor has value here. For me, it's a continuous process of growth. Give yourself a break.
I'm thrilled to be on the recovering side of the abyss. I can't tell you!
It's a little scary to come out with this on such a public forum, but if I can offer some support and in doing, strengthen my own recovery, I'm in.
Thanks,
Stringer (chanting) Keep coming back!
Cattitude
696 Posts
Congrats on your recovery Stringer. It IS scary to bare your soul on a public forum even though we can semi-hide behind our user names .
At first I was scared to tell anyone, anything because I thought no one had done what I did. I didn't even get help, that's how paranid I was.
You gave some good, solid advice and I hope that anyone who needs it will take heed.
And welcome to All Nurses!
the internet ate my first response tp you, argh. anyway, congrats on your recovery and keep coming back!
_______________________________________________________________
no it didn't...the forum is moderated in a way to ensure our flame free environment, keeping it safe, and accepting of members who share their hearts. patience is the word, allowing staff time to approve our postings.
hugs. wolfie
Silverdragon102, BSN
1 Article; 39,477 Posts
Thank you Stringer in sharing your story with us
Tweety, BSN, RN
35,418 Posts
Thanks for sharing. It helps me to hear your story. It's amazing what can happen if we "keep coming back". :)
sissiesmama, ASN, RN
1,898 Posts
Stringer - Hey! My name is Anne and I'm an addict! (7 years ago when I got busted for diversion of anything I could get my hands on I was TERRIFIED to say that!)
Congrats to you and your wife on your sobriety. My hubbie and I are also both revovering addicts and both have 7 years. We are a good added support system for each other. Welcome to the recovery site!
Anne, RNC:clpty:
time4meRN
457 Posts
Hi all,I'm Stringer, and my primary qualification is narcotics addict, but as most of you probably know, the addictive mind won't turn down many opportunities to include just about any repeatable behavior into the web. My experience includes alcohol and nicotine.My sobriety dates from August of 2000, but I turned myself in originally in 1995. Subsequently I failed Diversion for financial reasons and successfully finished the probation track for clearing my license about a year ago.You can tell from the brief time line sketched above that it has been a long hard journey. To add a complicating factor, my wife is also a recovering RN who is almost done with her probation track.There was a period of time where it appeared that we might lose everything, and we had 4 children at the time. We lost our 12 year old son to brain cancer at a time we were both in relapse. We lost just about everything, but I'm not able to tell the whole story here.For me, the keys to success have been and continue to be:1) Keep coming back, especially to your Higher Power, no matter how much you love your "sins" and loathe to give them up, no matter how entrenched you are in compulsions and their attendant lies. He/She/It/They will no more reject you than you would reject your son or daughter who finds themselves in a long siege.2) Keep coming back to your associations with people who will support you and who can pull your covers.3) 12 Steps over and over with an experienced sponsor.The onion peeling metaphor has value here. For me, it's a continuous process of growth. Give yourself a break.I'm thrilled to be on the recovering side of the abyss. I can't tell you!It's a little scary to come out with this on such a public forum, but if I can offer some support and in doing, strengthen my own recovery, I'm in.Thanks,Stringer (chanting) Keep coming back!
Well said ! I thought about not placing posts here but, I decided that it is 12 stepping to do so. So here I am. I'm not shy about my recovery at work (when appropriate). I share with pt's and staff if the need arises. The things that you have mentioned above are important to me too. The key for me was finding a sponsor that worked the steps by the big book. She was actually a pt of mine in an ER for many years, I had seen her come in so many time for narcs, seen her come in while in jail due to drugs etc... we know the story. Then , shaking in my shoes, I went to the firs AA meeting in my home town. There she was, I was so afraid she would reject me. But instead she welcomed me with open arms, I eventually worked the steps BY THE BOOK, and my life changed. I had been sober for a while at that point, but after that I was a piece. I also want to say I love this forum. It is so positve and just what I need. Beining an addict it's easy for me to get caught up in the nasty hateful posts in other forums. This on is just what my Higher Power orderd. Thanks !:redpinkhe