1. Self-Care is not just a buzz-word phrase.
For the two years I was in NP school I worked full time and managed my course load. The last year of that I also managed clinical hours, exceeding what was required. This often meant sleepless nights and only one day off, if that. But even my days off were fraught with finishing studies and just getting the family fed or the house cleaned. Fortunately, I had an amazing support system. This priceless commodity of my spouse, his mom, and my teenagers felt amazing . . . and made me feel quite guilty.
I had several crying jags when I felt as if I were neglecting the very same individuals who want so much for me to succeed and who also sacrificed so that on rare occasions I could sleep in, or instead of resting themselves, were tending to duties I could not. Some resentment on their end was felt, but it passed and I reconciled the fact that this, too, will pass.
When their mental and physical well being suffered, mine did too, and vice versa. Losing my father my very first quarter left me bereft. Each milestone along the way was bittersweet because he was one of my biggest fans. But it also motivated me because I set goals long before he was sick and I wanted to do what would make all of us (him, me, family) proud.
But I was not well. I gained 20 pounds or so. I felt more agitated, more morose, less content. Motivation waned and much-needed breaks were filled with completing things neglected during the term. The demands on a graduate student are much, and that is not the only hat we wear.
All too often we hear ourselves telling family members caring for ill and debilitating family or friends that if they don't take time to care for themselves, they won't be any good to the patient.
Well, what's good for the goose is good for the gander, as they say. I had to force myself to develop a pattern of relaxation if even for a few minutes a day or every other day. I tried to exercise because the lack of it was taking its toll on my mental and physical health.
Since graduating in May I have lost almost all of what I've gained in weight and resumed a regular-ish pattern of fitness and even though I am back in school, I've resolved to maintain that because I'm not getting any younger and I can already tell the difference in tolerance and stamina from just two years ago.
Mindfulness, healthy eating and fitness habits, and the integral support network of family and/or friends is precious and all of these must be fostered.
2. Studying does not end once the diploma is in your hand.
Okay, this might seem like common sense, but I feel its importance might bear accentuating. Once you graduate you still need to take boards (a few take theirs prior to graduation). I was one of the last in my circle of classmates to test, but I was not ready. I continued to review and not just by testing (which in my opinion is not the best way to solidify a competent knowledge base).
I thirsted to understand the processes and treatments better and to learn to practice by synthesizing the rationale for why we do A, B, or C and how to fine-tune it for patient-centered care.
A myriad of resources are available and each student/graduate must find what works best for them. There are live reviews, online reviews, review books, testing books, question banks, and who knows what else. A healthy balance of moderate study day by day reinforces learned content and allows the graduate to hone in on what deficits need to be reinforced.
I am not ashamed of testing 5 months after graduating. Do I wish I'd done so sooner? Yes and no. Being done earlier would have been great, but I knew I wouldn't have done as well. Know thyself.
3. Know thy job market.
Region and setting define what demand is available for your new role. For far too many there is the rose-colored glasses belief that there are plenty of jobs and for so much that is simply not as true. Do the research to see what the median salary is in the area. Look at your local NP group and see if there is any documentation from their archives about salaries, jobs, et cetera. My group had a survey from the previous year that showed years of experience, settings worked, benefits and salaries offered, as well as degree attainment.
With the understanding of who and what you are against, you can be forewarned and armed with much more data so that you are not a timid doe seeking that little slice of NP heaven. Fight for what you can appropriately attain. Don't be afraid to negotiate. There are plenty of threads here with such similar (and better advice) than mine on that topic.
4. It is ok to turn down a job.
This is not the time to "play nice." You need to be business minded. If an offer is not working for you and negotiations don't yield what you must have, then turn it down. This is so much harder than it should be for several reasons. There are those I've heard say that nurses are usually too altruistic to succeed without ruffling feathers.
Folks, wake up. Unless you have no other choices or you'll be homeless, don't settle for less than you are worth and don't be afraid to say, "No thank you. I will keep you in mind for future opportunities." (Remember you really shouldn't burn bridges. The medical community is small, unforgiving, and has a long memory.)
5. Credentialing takes a really long time.
I asked during my interview how long the process took and was told straight up that it took 6 months. Even knowing that, despite signing the contract in November, I'm told today that my start date is postponed. I shouldn't be surprised or discouraged, but it is a little bit of a bummer. I'm really excited to start, but I have to be patient.
Be. Patient.
Also, this process can be daunting and redundant. Just have all of your ducks in a row. Make sure you have your professional liability information, your vaccination information, and so many other specifics that you'll need readily available for dissemination to various entities. In my case it is the contracted organization and facility who each need my data. Fortunately, there are members of this team whose sole jobs are to be liaisons between the facility and our employer.
6. OH! And DON'T QUIT YOUR RN JOB!
I turned in my notice last week with a generous 8-week head start. (Minimum of 4 weeks required). Today I had to rescind it. It is left open and pending confirmation of my newly placed start date. Remember #5? Credentialing takes a really. long. time. On the bright side, my current coworkers were happy that I'm not leaving them yet. I heard a lot of, "Well YAY!" today.
I still have bills to pay and counting my FNP eggs before they hatch is a bad idea.
I look forward to others' input and pearls of wisdom.
