"You dont look like a Susan Brown" (long)

Nurses General Nursing

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I want to know how other people would react.....Am I over reacting?

Not too long ago, my nursing dept got a new health manager due to the expected retirement of the existing health manager. The nurse who was about to retire has a name that does not sound ethnic, (Please do not blast me) just say its Susan Brown. She stayed on to train the new health manager before officially retiring....

Another nurse and I needed needed to get certified in CPR, and Mrs "Susan" gave me her corporate card to pay for the class. Ok. Here's what really burned my tail. The new manager, told me she was nervous about me using Susan's corporate card, because I dont "look" like a Susan Brown!!!!! I felt my face turn red, and I said....Well, my name is Cynthia Johnson, what do I look like my name is, Maria Gonzales? To explain a little bit more, I am half mexican and half black. I look very ethnic. I was very hurt and furious at the same time. I have never been made to feel like that before. Am I over reacting? Would any body else taken this to be a prejudiced statement?

Well, about a month later....the new nurse manager was suspended for sending a racist email through the company email network. The email was called...."I am white and proud" and was horrible. It stated how unfair it was to have an all black college like spellman or moorehouse, but if white people wanted an all white college, it was considered racist. Or, why was it ok for black gansters to promote violence against white cops, but it was unacceptable for white cops to beat "n----rs! I dont even want to repeat some of what the email said.

The new nurse manager was suspended for three days. We then had to have a meeting with her, to listen to how sorry she was, and that she was not a racist, that she just wanted people to "ponder" some of the ideas in the email. She asked us if we thought she was racist, and that she believed she never acted that way. I told her that she did, when she told me I didnt look like a "Susan Brown". I told her that I have never felt so humiliated, and that she made me "realize" my differences as far as ethnicity goes. I asked her to look at me, and tell me what she saw. Did she see someone who made a 4.0 in nursing school, someone who was named an All State Academic Scholar, or did she see a minority female who didnt "look" like a Susan Brown? She couldnt answer.

Thanks for listening.

Specializes in SICU.
OMG! I should have got this off my chest as soon as it happened! I underestimated the support I would get from you all here. Thank you.

I was deeply, deeply hurt by what this women said and did, because, I had just recently graduated from nursing school, where diversity is pounded into our heads. ANNNNNNND, I never thought I could excel in something like I did in nursing school! I found my calling!!!! Once I knew that I would never, never be looked down upon, (I MADE ALL A's!!! YEAH!! I never knew I could do that!! :)) she made that awful statement and knocked me off my high horse. It was traumatizing to say the least.

:angryfire

Honey, don't EVER let anyone "knock you off your high horse"!! Please, please... believe enough in yourself as a nurse and as a woman that remarks by ignorant asses just roll right off like water. Of course you can and should speak up for those out there that need a voice - but don't EVER feel like you are less, somehow, because of the color of your skin.

You are NOT.

Specializes in ICU;CCU;Telemetry;L&D;Hospice;ER/Trauma;.

The OP's thread just makes me want to cry....I am sooo sorry this happened to you...to be treated so wrongly....shame on her for having such a blatantly racist and pig headed idealism in her little pea brain....

the best thing that could happen to her is to be a patient one day in a foreign country....somewhere where SHE is the minority....where she doesn't speak the language, doesn't knoe the culture, and where SHE is looked upon as "less than"....ugh.

Specializes in ICU;CCU;Telemetry;L&D;Hospice;ER/Trauma;.

dang! I got my fingers all tangled up...the word is "know"....sigh.

Specializes in Day Surgery, Agency, Cath Lab, LTC/Psych.

Cyndie, I notice you are from Texas. I lived for a little while in Texas (long enough!) and noticed wide-spread racism that really shocked me. Most people seemed slightly prejudiced against Latinos, but towards African Americans the prejudice was profound. It wasn't just a few people here and there, almost everyone I worked with seemed racist. And, the worst part was, they didn't even realize that they were! The large church that I went to had one black parishioner. But, worst of all were the comments from one of my Latino coworkers. You would think that as a minority she would have been sensitive towards other minorities but that was not true. Once I heard her joke about a mixed-race couple whose children would be called, "n***lets." Unbelievable prejudice. I was so upset by my coworkers overt racism but felt nervous to report up the chain of command because the higher-ups were not much better. I just hope that you know that her opinions are in the MINORITY and are absolutely inappropriate.

Specializes in Pediatrics.
Unfortunately I think things like this happen all too often. I had something like this happen as the result of my name, which is Alisha Lopez. My husband's family is Colombian and I am as pale as a ghost. I went to get an x-ray done at a local clinic and my appointment was at 9. Of course offices run late, so around 10:15 I got a little antsy. Finally, 10:50 someone peeking around a corner in a shy and discouraged way says "Ms. Alisha Lopez?" I walked up to her and smiled. She said "I have been looking for a translator for the past hour, glad to see I don't need one." You talk about a WTH moment!!!!!!!!!! I turned around and walked out. I just was so incredibly shocked. I mean she could have totally kept that comment to herself.

People will never change unfortunately. I feel sorry for people who are intolerant, indifferent, and most IGNORANT.

I am sorry you went through such a horrible ordeal.

We could have had the same doctor! My ex-husband is hispanic and when we had our first son we gave him a traditional name Alejandro, well took him to a new doctor for a check up I got there on time and we waited and they came out with a translator. The MA when she saw me told her translator "Oh I guess I dont need you she's white" At that moment I wish I had paid attention better in Spanish class, so I could have just started speaking in Spanish just to prove her wrong. On the other side my former husband when he started a new job at a lumber company he didnt really talk to his coworkers so they all thought that he only spoke spanish and he was able to listen to them talk about him in front of him!! He lost that job becasuse unlike the the OP my ex didnt restrain himself!

Specializes in Corrections, neurology, dialysis.

To the OP, I can't believe how incredibly ignorant she is! However, the fact that she asks you to consider some of the thoughts in her original e-mail does show how likely she is to cling to her racist beliefs.

Unfortunately you can't enlighten the whole world. I'm white so I have no idea how that feels or any idea how to make you feel better. I think making people aware of their...unawareness...will hopefully enlighten a few more people along the way, little by little.

I know lots of black women with what some might consider "white" names - Tammy, Connie, Brenda, Dianne, Vickie, April, Pam, Debbie, Karen. What rock does she live under?

Specializes in ICU;CCU;Telemetry;L&D;Hospice;ER/Trauma;.

Case in Point:

My son, who was a soldier at Ft. Hood, Texas had a locker with his last name on the outside....

Isaacson....

There were a few in his platoon who hated Jews, blacks, latinos, heck they probably hated their own mothers....

They decided, based ONLY on my son's last name that he must be a Jew....so they defaced his locker, and then tried to kick the livin' snot out of him, (sort of one of those after school fights common in junior high)....

Two things: his last name was from the Scandanavian side of his father's family...which, for five generations has been lefse eating Lutherans!

AND....the Jewish side of the family is MINE...which to look at any of us, you wouldn't "see" that we are Jewish, nor would you determine that from my maiden name....

WHat the idiots also didn't know was that since my son was knee high to a grasshopper he trained WELL in ShoTsuDo Kung Fu and Jeet Kun Do.....Bruce Lee's martial art....we all trained under one of the top marital artists in the world, Dan Inosanto...

So...the idiots took their best shot....and he knocked them all flat...

some were laying there crying...no kidding....

when the C.O. arrived, he saw what the six of them had done, and they were all placed in the brig for two days....and reprimanded by the ARMY for attacking a fellow soldier....I think two of them were dishonorably discharged, because of their bad attitudes and behaviour not becoming of a soldier.

This just shows how stupid prejudice is. How unfounded it is....and how stupid people are who embrace it are....underneath, we all bleed the same....we all breathe the same....and we all feel the same....

anyone who thinks differently must now be human.

crni

Specializes in ICU;CCU;Telemetry;L&D;Hospice;ER/Trauma;.

ugh! my fingers!! the line should read, "anyone who thinks differently must NOT be human."....my bad.

Specializes in Occ health, Med/surg, ER.
Case in Point:

they were all placed in the brig for two days....and reprimanded by the ARMY for attacking a fellow soldier....I think two of them were dishonorably discharged

crni

Good. The Military should not put up with that.

To the OP, I'm sorry you had to go through this but unfortunately you are fighting a very hard battle. I'm glad you did what you did and handled yourself as a professional. I hope that this never happens to you again but odds are, It Will! I am black and Ive had similar situations happen to me from coworkers to patients. Once I was coming in with the nursing assistant to meet my new patient. I introduced myself as the nurse and the assistant announced her name and proceeded to take vital signs. The family starts asking a million questions and directs all of them to my white coworker cna...I answer...again, another question to the cna...and again... until she(cna) finally looks at me and tells the family, SHE IS THE NURSE!! Also, this weekend one of my coworker got yelled at for coming into a patients room and automatically starts speaking her broken spanish to a patient just because she assumed she couldnt speak English and her last name was Robletos. The patient yelled at her in English! :trout:

Specializes in Occ health, Med/surg, ER.

Here is something I'm proud of.....

http://www.ptk.org/schol/all_state/NMmem.htm Im the second person on the list!

I graduated at the top of my nursing class, and I was respected by fellow students and instructors. Im proud that I am a minority... and you all are right, some people are just ignorant. Thanks you all!!!!!

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

A person who cannot see beyond someone else's skin tone is a fool and an idiot. Like Oprah says, we're all just people who pee.

CRNI, I love the story about your son. I'm not a fan of fighting, but it sounds like those morons got what they deserved in a number of ways.

To the OP -- I am so sorry for what happened to you, and I do not think you are overrreacting in the least. I am white but have a Hispanic last name by marriage. I hear crap all the time; I usually just let them keep talking, digging their proverbial graves, and then tell them, "There's something you should know..." Oh, the backtracking and foot-in-mouth moments I have seen. I feel your pain, friend.

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