Quit or be fired?

Published

I have been with the same company for 4 years and have NEVER called out b/c of snow/ice storms. This weekend my two kids ages 16 and 12 will have to be alone while I'm at work and its a pretty sure thing I'll be snowed in for the whole weekend. My work is a 45 minute drive and I just feel like it's dangerous to leave them alone. I'm a single mom and usually I have a back-up plan and a second back-up plan but these have fallen through. I called and talked to my DON (the staffing nurse was fired - no warning :uhoh21: ) and she insists I have to come in no matter what. Again, I have NEVER called out on account of the weather...this is more of a child-care issue. We used to be able to bring our kids to work but that is now against the rules. In fact, besides people coming in to work not knowing they'd been fired there have been a lot of other things going on with this new administration I don't like. My question is, do I quit without giving a notice or do I let them fire me? I've been with them for 4 years and that is a large chunk of my work history. :crying2:

Specializes in Geriatric/LTC, Rehab, Home Hhealth.
Yes..I know but it seems to me that people's bosses are telling them they have no choice. Yeah sure they have the choice to quit their job but wow...what a choice! I think we'll just have to agree to disagree. :)

I will look into how illegal it is though. Here its legal for 14 year olds to babysit. At least I hope so since I've ben babysittig since i was 13. (with the babysitting course or not) Ice storm or no ice storm.

Please remember it isnt about who's right or who isn't. Just different ways of doing things. :)

Dear Z's playa: This was a difficult call so I asked everybody else what they would do and why. Personally, I was "left to fend" for myself at a young age...although I survived my teenage years I have several friends who didn't. Because it would be difficult to describe my son's level of function I left out the fact that he has a very mild cerebal palsy....it has more caused social delays than anything else although there are the obvious gross motor and speech issues. This condition is again so mild I had difficulty with the Dx. He gets no special tx and qualifies for no special classes. His IQ is just at 100. Still, even without this, I have to say that as a single mom you draw the line....and then re-draw it and re-draw it. I can't anymore. My kids do come first as in my own heart I see fit to raise them....if I am a little more protecting than others maybe its because I've seen more horrors than others. I don't feel I have to toughen them up...the world will do that soon enough. Thank you for your input and try the funnel cake recipe...hot oil. adult supervision (ha ha)

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Good for you Wendy!

ITA that we don't have to toss our babies to the wolves.

I also won't toss them in to learn to swim, etc.

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Specializes in Inpatient Acute Rehab.
I am one of the nurses that gets stuck when my co-worker has a family emergency and has to stay home with her daughters. We looked it up on the schedules over the last 2 years have had to come in, stay late or change my schedule 41 times to accomodate her family needs.

My question is, should we only hire single nurses without dependants so can decrease the excuses of not covering in times of need? I am sure damn tired of being the single nurse that is supposed to cover for the mother that has to stay home with their children.

Granted 41 times is alot of times. However, sounds to me like you had a choice, and CHOSE to accomodate her family needs.

Also, if no one chose to hire single mothers, then there would be a HUGE percent of unemployed single mothers. Of course, that might be okay, if you would like for your tax dollars to go even higher so you can help pay for these unemployed single mothers and their chidren.

I am a married nurse with children. I usually do not have to take off, but if I do, it is because the kids are ill. Are you going to suggest that no one hire nurses if they have children, even if they are married?? Married or not, that is discrimination.

Personally, I am sick and tired of being the one to have to work a double every Friday or Saturday that I work because the young, single nurse with no kids calls off so she can go party!!!!!

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I would be tired of it, too. Please try not to lump all single parents together. To answer your question about hiring nurses without dependants - I think that's illegal. I don't think its legal for them to force you personally to cover this person 41 times in 2 years...is this being addressed at your work now?

Well I started refusing to cover for her or letting my schedule be altered to accomodate her and she then called in 2x so could be available for events she had asked for, but was supposed to be on call. She has given notice.

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I am one of the nurses that gets stuck when my co-worker has a family emergency and has to stay home with her daughters. We looked it up on the schedules over the last 2 years have had to come in, stay late or change my schedule 41 times to accomodate her family needs. I had one and that was for my fathers funeral earlier this year. She complained that she missed a basketball game so told her would not change schedule, stay late or cover for her anymore. She has since given notice.

As for affecting promotions, never have seen it affect promotions or pay raises.

My question is, should we only hire single nurses without dependants so can decrease the excuses of not covering in times of need? I am sure damn tired of being the single nurse that is supposed to cover for the mother that has to stay home with their children.

Yes and we should start by contacting all nursing schools and tell them not to enroll ANY students with dependents. That would nip this whole problem in the bud.

And if anyone decides to try and get clever and have kids AFTER school. Well, we have the BON just pull their license. We need to make these people an example.

Added: Though if someone does already have kids and really wants to be a nurse, states can start a "Kids for Nurses" program where you trade in your children so you can go to nursing school.

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Yes and we should start by contacting all nursing schools and tell them not to enroll ANY students with dependents. That would nip this whole problem in the bud.

And if anyone decides to try and get clever and have kids AFTER school. Well, we have the BON just pull their license. We need to make these people an example.

Oh, and before I forget....what we REALLY need to do is when you enroll in nursing school, without any children of course...include the cost of contraceptive surgery with tuition. Spay an neuter these people because health care workers have no business having kids. PATIENTS COME FIRST!!!!

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Dear Z's playa: This was a difficult call so I asked everybody else what they would do and why. Personally, I was "left to fend" for myself at a young age...although I survived my teenage years I have several friends who didn't. Because it would be difficult to describe my son's level of function I left out the fact that he has a very mild cerebal palsy....it has more caused social delays than anything else although there are the obvious gross motor and speech issues. This condition is again so mild I had difficulty with the Dx. He gets no special tx and qualifies for no special classes. His IQ is just at 100. Still, even without this, I have to say that as a single mom you draw the line....and then re-draw it and re-draw it. I can't anymore. My kids do come first as in my own heart I see fit to raise them....if I am a little more protecting than others maybe its because I've seen more horrors than others. I don't feel I have to toughen them up...the world will do that soon enough. Thank you for your input and try the funnel cake recipe...hot oil. adult supervision (ha ha)

Oooooooh...........I understand more why you were so reluctant to leave him now. :)

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Specializes in Inpatient Acute Rehab.
Oh, and before I forget....what we REALLY need to do is when you enroll in nursing school, without any children of course...include the cost of contraceptive surgery with tuition. Spay an neuter these people because health care workers have no business having kids. PATIENTS COME FIRST!!!!

As my mother--(who was a fine nurse!!! and had kids!!!!) would say---

Sarcasm is for angry people who have issues in their own life, and need to find a new one!!!

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As my mother--(who was a fine nurse!!! and had kids!!!!) would say---

Sarcasm is for angry people who have issues in their own life, and need to find a new one!!!

Well, I guess that would also apply to angry people who like to cast judgement and practically condemn a single mom who is doing her best to take care of her kids.

Oh, and I'm not angry, I'm quite happy actually.

and I like this smiley

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Specializes in Geriatric, LTC, PC, home care, pediatric.

:balloons: :balloons: :balloons: :rotfl: :rotfl: I like the smileys I like sarcasm I no like angry people

I did like the bits of sarcasm. :chuckle

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Specializes in med/surg, day surgery, psych as a CNA.

I guess I've just been lucky. I just can't imagine working for any place who would treat you like that. And they wonder why there's a nursing shortage? What if you got into an accident on the way to work? I know there are some places in the US where the company "forcing" you to come in can be held liable. I just wish you luck and take care of yourself and your children first. No job is worth your life or your childrens life, now matter what IMHO...

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http://hr.unc.edu/Data/SPA/leave/adverseweatherleave.htm

HI THERE.

TRY THE ABOVE HOME PAGE!

ONE OF YOUR CHILD IS 16 YEARS OLD AND I MEAN THAT IS OLD ENOUGH TO DATE!

IF YOU GIVE YOUR CHILD THAT IS 16 YEARS OLD SOME INSTRUCTIONS AND IF YOU HAVE BEEN RAISING YOUR CHILD TO BE RESPONSIBLE I BET HE/SHE CAN BE OLD ENOUGH TO TAKE CARE OF THE 12 YEAR OLD CHILD!

MY SISTER IN LAW BEEN LEAVING HER TWO OTHER KIDS WITH HER 13 YEAR OLD SINCE HE TURN 13 AND THAT IS LEGAL I THINK OR SO SHE SAYS!

I WOULD IF I HAD A CHILD THAT TURN 13 HAVE HIM/HER TO TAKE FIRST AID AND CRP CLASSES AND ALSO CLASSES THAT WOULD ENLIGHTEN HIM/HER ABOUT BABY SITTING RESPONSIBILITY AND HAVE HIM/HER WORK AS A BABY SITTER!

OR EVEN JUST TO TAKE CARE OF NEPHEWS AND NIECES!

I MEAN IF THAT WORK PLACE IS A GOOD PLACE TO WORK AND IT IS HARD TO LOOK FOR A JOB I WOULD PROBABLY GO TO WORK AND JUST GIVE YOUR 16 YEAR OLD INSTRUCTIONS I MEAN IF HE/SHE IS NOT RETARTED OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT AND IS ABLE TO MAKE SOUND MIND DECISIONS!

YOU ARE ONLY A PHONE CALL AWAY!

IF YOU HAVE A RELATIVE THAT LIVES A COUPLE MILES AWAY AND YOU DO NOT FEEL COMFORTABLE LEAVING YOUR TWO CHILDREN ALONE THEN HAVE THEM AND I BET THE 16 YEAR OLD CAN DRIVE ALREADY DRIVE TO A GRANDMA OR A COUSIN AND SEE IF THEY CAN STAY THERE UNTIL YOU COME HOME!

YOU CAN ALWAYS CALL!

AND ALSO DOUBLE CHECK WITH THE WEATHER IF THERE IS AN ANTICIPATION OF BEING SNOWED IN OR ROAD BLOCK AND IF THERE IS THEN BY NOW MEANS DO NOT GO TO WORK AND STAY WITH YOUR KIDS!

I REMEMBER ONCE WHEN IT WAS RAINING HARD AND THERE WAS A FLOOD THAT WE DID NOT HAVE TO GO TO WORK AND WE GOT PAID BUT I THINK THEY DO NOT HAVE THAT ANYMORE!

BE ACTIVE WITH YOUR LOCAL LEGISLATIONS!

CALL YOUR LOCAL DISTRICT ASSEMBLYPERSON AND TELL THEM TO AUTHOR A BILL REGARDING WORK ON BAD WEATHER!

KATHY

Kathy, I appreciate your response, but I guess it's a personal decision. When I am at work I give my all to my patients. I love my job. However, my family comes first. There is no job that will ever be more important than the safety and health of my girls. I am very honest with my employers. I have also been "stuck" at work quite late for other nurses emergencies. Truth is things happen in other peoples life's too. Sometimes nurses can't come in and are not able to give adequate notice. We are people too, we make mistakes and have personal issues just like everybody else. I know I have to be comfortable with my decision and it's my choice to stay home with my kids.

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