I am a 19 year old who is pursuing a BSN. One of the aspects of Nursing that I find most appealing in the fact that there is great job flexibility. Where I am from, a Nurse can work 80 hrs one week and have a free week the next. Or they could work just the weekends. The salary is also decent enough to point where a nurse can work part time as well and still get by.
HOWEVER, I have heard that Nurses are oftentimes required to work some holidays and weekends, but usually they are compensated with not having to work the next holiday and weekend.
I have no kids yet, but I would like to have several children if possible. So my questions to nurses who are moms:
1. Do you consider Nursing a family-friendly field? Why or why not?
2. Has your job severely impacted your family life in a negative way? If so, how?
3. If you are a single mother to 3-5 children, has your Nursing job afforded you to take care of your kids financially as well as save for retirement?
4. Finally, if you had to do Nursing all over again, would you? If not, what other field would you choose?
Please also state which field of Nursing you are in. Thanks!
"I once scheduled my son's hand surgery 6 months in advance so I could be sure I'd be off, but less than a week before the surgery my boss informed me I couldn't have that night off, after all. So my husband was there while my son had surgery, but I was not.
When my other son broke his leg, I had to leave him in others' hands because I had no choice but to go to work. The only other option would be to quit my job, which we could not afford. (You can't just call in sick, unless you work for a place with an extremely lenient policy.)
I once scheduled my son's hand surgery 6 months in advance so I could be sure I'd be off, but less than a week before the surgery my boss informed me I couldn't have that night off, after all. So my husband was there while my son had surgery, but I was not.
When my other son broke his leg, I had to leave him in others' hands because I had no choice but to go to work. The only other option would be to quit my job, which we could not afford. (You can't just call in sick, unless you work for a place with an extremely lenient policy.)
I've had two close friends who had a child that died while they were at work, and they were unable to leave work even though their child died. One child died from an asthma attack; the other died when her ventricular shunt malfunctioned. Granted, this was at a hospital that did not have management who cared at all about the nurses. I'm sure that at my current place, my manager and colleagues would somehow find a way to allow me to leave work if my child was seriously ill. Not all places are as good as this." -HollyHobby post
I love the nursing profession, and I have a job I adore. Luckily, I work in a unit where the staff supports each other, and I have a manager and assistant manager who are very understanding and willing to work with anyone to help meet their family needs the best way possible.
By the way, yes you can "just call in sick." As long as your facility's policy doesn't say no one can ever take time off or be sick, it is your right. If you work in a facility that doesn't realize you're a human and not a machine, I'd suggest switching jobs.
We must have some seriously different views because I would walk away from a job and even be willing to risk losing my license at any moment if an immediate family member had an emergency and they tried to tell me I couldn't go. I don't even have kids yet, but my family will always come first no matter who tells me otherwise. Sure, a stable job and income is important, but you'd see me flipping burgers at McDonalds before you'd see me staying at work during a parent's heart attack or a child's death.
Some hospital units offer 8 hour shifts, and the 7 a-3 p or 11 p-7 a shifts are both very family friendly. You're home when your kids get home, and you're the one to tuck them into bed at night. 12 hour shifts mean you are gone longer, but you also have more days off each week. School nursing and clinic nursing have very family friendly hours with no weekends and no holidays. You could do nursing research, nursing education, or nursing informatics within normal business hours. If you have a nice second income in your home, you can consider part time or PRN work. The possibilities are endless! :)
The unfamilyfriendliness (how's that for a word!) of hospital nursing is one of the main reasons that I have now switched to public health nursing. I am a single mom, and only made it through nursing school (a one year accelerated "second degree" BSN program) and my first nursing job in a hospital with the help of several very reliable (and not cheap!) babysitters. I was on the 3p-11p shift at a peds hospital for my first year of nursing, and then the 7a-3p for another 6 months before being able to get my current job. I worked in a much more family-friendly hospital than the one the previous poster described -- if a nurse's child was seriously ill or dying, there's no question that they would have been allowed to leave -- but it was still a very hard place to work as a single mom.
I now work 8:30a - 5p Monday through Friday. I get all federal holidays off, plus 3 weeks of vacation, great health benefits, and a pension if I stay at this job for at least 5 years (which I certainly plan to do!). I'm not doing hands on patient care any more, but I'm doing lots of health education plus some case management for kids in the foster care system. I love my job and am very glad I chose to go into nursing! I feel lucky to have such a great job!
I agree with the advice to go to nursing school and get some experience before you have kids. I actually liked my hospital job a lot, other than the hours, and would have liked to have more years of hospital experience before going into something else -- but because I chose nursing as a second career relatively late in life, that was not an option for me.
I'm actually REALLY nervous about starting at the hospital. I'm a fairly new nurse, graduated in August, had my 2nd baby (5 months now, daughter is 6.5 yrs) a few days before I graduate, and started working 6 weeks later in September at my first nursing job... at a doctors office. My hours are M-F 830-530 and I get one half day during the week (unpaid), and one hour lunch. It's a very cushy job I would say, but I know this job isn't going to get me too far in the future, and I don't feel challenged, and I'm not learning or practicing the skills that I was taught in nursing school.
So I was offered a job at the teaching hospital about 20 mins away, and it's on the surgical/med-surg floor, 3-12hr shifts for days. This will be very different for me, but I know I need to do this to better myself as a nurse and for future jobs. I know I can't leave during a shift, but my husband is military (currently on deployment) so I hope that my manager will be somewhat understanding if I called in "sick" if he's not here and such. I have friends nearby who would help me out in a pinch, so thank goodness for them. My new nurse manager was completely fine with my request to push back my start date 2 weeks later, b/c my husband's return date got delayed. I look forward to my new job, but I'm very nervous and I hope things go well. I'm still new at this, so I'm very happy and proud to have picked this career. Who knows how I will feel years later
Now all this would have been different as a single parent. There is no way I could do what I did. Who'd watch my kids from 3p until midnight. I'd say hospital nursing would be hard as a single parent. Daycare is much easier to find when it is 40 hours a week business hours.
That is the one thing that does bother me...daycare. Even though I'm 4-5 years away from having kids of my own, my mother says that she would be more than willing to watch my kids while I work (but then again, she can't wait until I start having children of mine. She'll be 49 next month!).
I see a lot of single mothers get into the profession of Nursing. And yet, Nursing isn't "single mother" friendly based on the weird hours.
I'll be graduating from nursing school in August, and I have to say that school with a small child has been completely doable and not nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. She was 8 months old when I started, and will be a little over 2 when I graduate. I think a lot of it has to do with your program, finding good childcare, having a supportive partner (which I do), and your attitude!!! I really think attitude and how well you do in school are the most important factors... I've maintained the attitude that school is SCHOOL and I'm not going to stress over every little thing. I do my best and move on. But, school has always come easily to me and I don't really need to stress about it. And, I actually think that having a child has helped me to keep school in it's place and have perspective. My child comes first, I cannot do school work when she's awake or it's just the 2 of us home together, so I have no choice but to just relax and enjoy our time together until I have the babysitter for a couple hours to study, or it's time to go to class. I don't even feel like I've spent that much time away from her. Definitely not as much as I would have if I had a full-time job. Just enjoy your life and don't plan too much! Things always seem to work out when you focus on the positive.
I'm a single Dad BTW but nursing has worked out great for my family. I have time off to spend with my kids. Also because my ex has always worked opposite schedules we have NEVER used daycare or child care. I can't tell you how much money that has saved us, not to mention all that time we have with the kids. Yes I work some holidays but so what? I've never held a "regular" job so it doesn't bother me at all. I feel sorry for all those people working 9-5, I'd kill myself.
1. Do you consider Nursing a family-friendly field? Why or why not?
2. Has your job severely impacted your family life in a negative way? If so, how?
3. If you are a single mother to 3-5 children, has your Nursing job afforded you to take care of your kids financially as well as save for retirement?
4. Finally, if you had to do Nursing all over again, would you? If not, what other field would you choose?
Please also state which field of Nursing you are in. Thanks!
My experience of nursing in general has not been very family friendly overall. I've been fortunate to work at some very nice places for some very nice people, but overall nursing has been very hard on me and my family by its very nature. I've never been denied time off to care for sick children and was given three days of funeral leave when my best friend was killed in a car accident. But the toll that nursing has taken on my body has changed my life. Twenty plus years of caring for bed ridden patients, moving them, making occupied beds, pushing heavy equipment, bending, etc., has left me with 2 confirmed herniated disks, 2 more suspected (another MRI next week), degenerative disk disease, and unrelenting pain.
I'm not a single mother anymore and only have two children, but I am the sole breadwinner for my family now. I have no retirement plan, no savings, and live paycheck-to-paycheck. I can put a roof over our heads, clothes on our backs, and food in our bellies. Heaven help us if the car breaks down or we need serious repairs to our home. I don't expect that I will ever be able to retire, short of winning the lottery.
Nursing was my dream since I was four years old. I cannot imagine ever doing anything different. I was able to take four years off when we moved overseas and after I had our son, and I was a heck of a housewife, but cannot imagine doing anything that is not related to nursing.
Nursing can also be very heard on a marriage. Shift work, working nights, the stress of caring for others can be very draining if your spouse does not understand what you do and how it impacts you. Working nights and sleeping days, people don't understand why your rhythms are off and you can't meet up with them for lunch or take their calls. Night shift itself is hard on your immune system, your sleep-wake cycles, your menstruation, your libido, your appetite, and probably a few other things I've forgotten.
I am fortunate now that I am working a "desk job" as a home health supervisor. I am able to take time off for doctor's appointments, although I can barely afford the co-pays. I don't have to push, pull, or lift anymore. But it's taken me 20+ years to get here and the damage is done. I am a bit jaded about nursing these days. Maybe my choice of a profession didn't necessarily cause my back problems, but it hasn't helped any either. Consider how it will affect you long-term.
I am a single mother of a teenager. Nursing is a second career for me. I went to nursing school after leaving a very secure job making great money in corporate america. I had a mortgage, a child, two cars, and bills. Luckily, I paid off all my credit cards before going to nursing school.
I work the weekend option, which means I work every Sat and Sun night and I get paid for three days. I also get full benefits. This works out great for my family life because I get to take my child to school Tues-Fri and I am also home in the evenings.
I do ok with just working 2 days a week. I got a good amount in savings and my bills are paid. I am taking my first REAL vacation in May and I can finally afford it. The good thing is I DO NOT have to use any PTO time, as it will be taken during the week.
Also, when I am bored, I will pick up extra hours in another area in the hospital. I usually do one 8 hour day a week, and this is my play money. I still take my child to school and I'm still at home in the evening.
I will NEVER go back to working M-F 0700-1530 again if I can help it!
I do NOT think its family friendly at all. I have always wanted to be a nurse, but one of the main things I remember hearing all of my adult life is "Nursing is so family friendly." Not true !!!! I am in Texas, and almost all of the hospital jobs here are 12 hour shifts. They have pretty well done way with 8. The 12 almost always turns into 14. You add an hour in traffic each way, and that's 16. That leaves me 8 hours to eat breakfast, shower, sleep, pick my son up from school, help with homework, spend time with the kids, make dinner, eat dinner, get my stuff together, groom and leave for work. 8 hours is the amount of time most people sleep. I sleep about 4.
I have heard "It makes up for it because you get 4 days off ". First you do not always get 4 days off in a row. I can say that most of the time I get 2 or sometimes 3, but very rarely 4. As a new hospital RN around here you can almost count on night shift. This means you leave the hospital at 9am after having left your house 16 hours before, and get home at around 10am. This is day off one, and you sleep. If you only have two days off in a row then guess what the next day is the only day off you will be awake for. If you have three then you really have two days off. I usually have one day off in the middle of the week which is totally useless cause I sleep. If you are going to to be awake to see your family then during that two/three days you are also trying to rotate your schedule. So on that first day you only sleep from 11am until 4p, and then go back to sleep by midnight, and sleep all night. Then the next morning you have a normal day, but then stay up all night without sleeping, and go to be around 7a-8a so you can go to work that night etc.
You also feel so beaten up, worn down etc that it takes a day or two to feel like yourself. I have also found that the day before I feel like I am leaving my family and literally not going to be in real contact so I get depressed.
My hospital does NOT have sick days we have PTO days which cover everything. It doesn't matter if you need surgery, your kid is sick, your house burned down,, your tire went flat, its too icey to drive to work etc you get 7 times a year and on the 8th you are fired. At 3 you get a talking too, at 5 you get written up, and at 7 you get a next time you will be let go, and at 8 your are fired.
You do not get snow days or its too dangerous to drive to work to day time, you will work most holidays because the patients never leave, and there are no holidays in the hospital.
And with 12 hour shifts regardless if you work days or nights you will be at work in the evenings either getting there at 6:45p or just leaving around 8p. This means missing PTA meetings, football games, band concerts etc unless it falls on your night off. They put out a hour week schedule at a time, but only put it out a few days to a week before it starts. This means that I originally know my schedule for 4 weeks, but then only for 3, then 2, then one, and then only for a few days. Makes it very difficult to plan for the future.
As far as leaving if your family/child had a medical emergency or were sick/died. They would let me leave, but you can bet it would be an occurrence and one of my 8 before getting fired. So you had better come up with someone to pick up sick kids from school, take sick kids to the Dr, and wrap up accident prone kiddos in bubble wrap.
If I had to do it over again I would do something else.
I have to be honest, as I'm reading through this thread it's really upsetting to hear how unfamily friendly nursing is
I am not a nurse yet, I start my program this fall and I have two little girls (3yrs and 1.5yrs). Other than school I am a stay at home mom and I love spending time with them. Right now I'm taking my classes at the CC so I'm only away a few hours a couple times a week, I know once my program starts it will be much longer (baby steps, lol). But to think that when all is said and done with school, and I have a job, that I won't be seeing them at all is heartbreaking:scrying:!
I would hate to miss important events...I come from a divorced family, I lived with my mom, who was in the military. She was out of the house by 6am and didn't get home until 6pm and had drill one weekend a month. Growing up I felt like she was never home and that I never to spend enough time with her and I feel like our relationship has struggled because of this. I love my girls, I love my family and I intend on having 1 if not 2 more children once I get a job. I want to be there for them...physically, mentally, financially...
This whole thread has me second guessing my choice to pursue my dream...I need some positive encouragement! There's gotta be momma's out there making it work and not feel like it's taking a toll on their family, right?
Nursing is very family freindly. I'm a single parent of a 8yr old little boy and I'm blessed to have a flexiable 8-5 Mon-fri. I choose not to work in a hospital setting bc I AM A SINGLE PARENT and hospital's are more strick about you not calling in, no matter if child is sick or not. Not only that, you may be stuck there if a nurse calls in that is following you. For this reason I cant risk working in a hospital setting. Now to piggyback on the child death, I find it hard to believe that a parent would be made to stay at work knowing that and there would be no way I would continue to work there after that. I would have walked out of there and told them to take that job and shove it up their ---.
Also when I was married my ex and I saved alot of money on daycare by me work 3rd shift for a few years.
There are so MANY options for nurses weather you are married with kids, single parent or, divorced with kids.
I love and feel blessed to be a nurse, not every profession has all the options we have.
NurseInTexas12
38 Posts
"I once scheduled my son's hand surgery 6 months in advance so I could be sure I'd be off, but less than a week before the surgery my boss informed me I couldn't have that night off, after all. So my husband was there while my son had surgery, but I was not.
When my other son broke his leg, I had to leave him in others' hands because I had no choice but to go to work. The only other option would be to quit my job, which we could not afford. (You can't just call in sick, unless you work for a place with an extremely lenient policy.)
I once scheduled my son's hand surgery 6 months in advance so I could be sure I'd be off, but less than a week before the surgery my boss informed me I couldn't have that night off, after all. So my husband was there while my son had surgery, but I was not.
When my other son broke his leg, I had to leave him in others' hands because I had no choice but to go to work. The only other option would be to quit my job, which we could not afford. (You can't just call in sick, unless you work for a place with an extremely lenient policy.)
I've had two close friends who had a child that died while they were at work, and they were unable to leave work even though their child died. One child died from an asthma attack; the other died when her ventricular shunt malfunctioned. Granted, this was at a hospital that did not have management who cared at all about the nurses. I'm sure that at my current place, my manager and colleagues would somehow find a way to allow me to leave work if my child was seriously ill. Not all places are as good as this." -HollyHobby post
I love the nursing profession, and I have a job I adore. Luckily, I work in a unit where the staff supports each other, and I have a manager and assistant manager who are very understanding and willing to work with anyone to help meet their family needs the best way possible.
By the way, yes you can "just call in sick." As long as your facility's policy doesn't say no one can ever take time off or be sick, it is your right. If you work in a facility that doesn't realize you're a human and not a machine, I'd suggest switching jobs.
We must have some seriously different views because I would walk away from a job and even be willing to risk losing my license at any moment if an immediate family member had an emergency and they tried to tell me I couldn't go. I don't even have kids yet, but my family will always come first no matter who tells me otherwise. Sure, a stable job and income is important, but you'd see me flipping burgers at McDonalds before you'd see me staying at work during a parent's heart attack or a child's death.