Dancehall Doctor

hit relpy ,then post

“virginity was guarded like the Twinkie room at Graceland,” and you had to go steady and give up your letter jacket just to get a kiss on the mouth. He didn’t plan to marry again, he’d just look for a woman he could grow to hate and buy her a house. ...

This topic has lagged! He is walking in my tracks ,but he will never fill my shoes - by Jerry Lee Lewis

Whenever I used to ask my grandmother what we were having for dinner, my grandpa would always get this ornery look on his face and say, "Hog **** and hominy". That politician is so crooked he can hide behind a cork screw ! She is so skinny if she stu...

Thats as screwed up as swimming cleets!

These are slicker that "snot on a Goats Glass eye"

Just got back ,Good Job FOlks! keep em coming:wink2:

“I freed a thousand slaves I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves.”---Harriet Tubman There are many forms Of slavery too!!!!!!!

I guess Mysubscription ran out here,had to check back in. * If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'. * Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got. * The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, wa...

aint got the brains god gave a pis# ant. (looks sad) you look like somebody stole your dog walkin in high cotton

Come On Lets Hear them!!!! "Ugly as Homemade soap" "So ugly he could make a freight train take a dirt road"

Nice body, but ugly face dreamboat body...shipwreck face is what I call em...

I have said for 20 years . __________ if it harelips the Devil! A friend once told me about a job he did. He said the Job went in "slick a snot on a hoe handle" I tought i'd bust a gut a Laughing

Are any of Y'all good folks enjoying these?

Tennessee Ten Commandments ________________________________________ Some people in Tennessee have trouble with all those "shalls" and "shall nots" in the Ten commandments. Folks just aren't used to talking in those terms. So, some folks in middle Te...

More screwed up than a soup sandwich

so tired I wouldn't walk ten feet to see a piss-ant f***k an elephant!!! Keep it going add yours!!!

Handy as hip pockets on a hog. So ugly that his mama takes him everywhere she goes so she doesn't have to kiss him goodbye. Looks like he sorts bobcats for a living. I Got a Million of them ,most are not too"nice" id love to add obscure ones to my...

These have languished in obscurity too long!!!!!!!! 'I'm feeling as low as a toad in a dry well.' " For someone confused: "I don't know whether to scratch my watch or wind my butt." She's so pretty she could make a hound dog smile. Add yours!

If you sneeze around she will say, "Scat, cat, get your tail outa the gravy!" Go figure. My step-grandmother-in-law (whew!) calls that white stringy sinewy stuff that you have to trim off of raw chicken striffin. The word's bigger than me and been ...

read this and thought id shareand say ==Thanks to You ALL! I Had a baby die on me tonight :-( I am an ER nurse and had a little one die this morning. It has made me so upset I feel sick. Parents hug your kids this morning tell them you love them and...

Here iis one I Liked. He or she is so fat when they dance the band skips!^selah Keep it going please.

"Squirming around like minks on a griddle." "Red As a Jaybird's A$$," "couldn't organize a Pi$$-up in a brewery" Never admit to more than you're accused of Gauge- Like a Harley T shirt I saw Once it said " If I gotta explain, You wont understand" ^ ...

A great name for a new country song: If I'd Shot You Sooner, I'd Be Out of Jail by Now. ~Author Unknown