Dear First NUrsing job,
I'm very sorry you had such a lousy first job but , and I hate to say it, welcome to real world nursing. I am 57 yrs old and I have had 3 jobs so far and none of them have taken.....the longest one was 2.5 yrs and now I'm out on my can as well.
What you need to do is take a couple of days or so and regroup yourself. You can't possibly understand anything that went on in total when you're so upset. It never feels good to get let go but when it does you have to look at the bright side of things and say to yourself the next job will be better...........and it could very well be.
I started after graduation in an ICU residency which had me on the floor in 6 months when I tought it was going to be for a whole year of training. I made one mistake and boom out i went in 6 months. Then I was on a med surg floor and for whatever the reason I could not tell precisely when a pt was going bad. Plus i had a host of other poor critical thinking issues. So that one lasted 10 months. Then I figured well if I can't manage people who we're trying to make better maybe I could manage those who were dying....well that took the 2.5 yrs before it just ended today. So you see, for some of us newbies we have to do trial by fire before we can understand where we belong.
So after your two days of getting over the shock sit down and start a journal or talk with some people or even a therapist or career counselor (I'm doing the counselor thing). This will help you figure out your strengths and weaknesses and then at some point you'll be ready to figure out what challlenge to try next. Think of it as a learning lesson. You picked up some knowledge, you certainly got dumped on from the sounds of it. So now you have an understanding of what questions to ask if you were to decide to try the same type of nursing. If you feel it really didn't suit you then you need to figure out what might work better for you. Its all about knowing who you are and what might work best for you.
Hang in there and I wish us both the best :)..........SMILE cause its only a job....NOT your entire life.....be glad you're not still in such a stressful place that's constantly sapping your energy and making you sick. LIfe is about balance.....go find your balance.....
All the best.....