Or am I just trying to prove to myself I could do it?
I've got 6 months til graduation, getting my BSN from TCU. I decided to go to nursing school after already getting a bachelor's from UVA because I'd been working for a nonprofit medical society for Emergency Docs (administrative stuff). I guess on some level --and because the docs are the ones that inspired me to go to nursing school--I was hoping I would be cut out for the ED. I always want to be the best at what I do. And from what I can tell (or have been told), ER nurses really are the best. You have to get your skills down and be efficient at them. There isn't time to waste.
When I share this with anyone "well, I'm thinking I might want to work in the emergency department"-- they say: oh, are you an adrenaline junkie? But if I'm being honest, the answer is NO. But, just because I don't love stress and thrive on pressure doesn't mean I couldn't be good at it, right? I have learned things about myself in school that I didn't realize before, namely that I have the ability to stay calm under pressure. I don't "freak out." I hate drama and am quick to offer my help. I want to be part of a team, not "the nurses versus the docs" as it seems on the floor. I also have no illusions that I'm a genius or have it all figured out. I'm humble and I will learn from others whether they're the head of the department or the tech. That's probably my main reason for wanting to be in the ER in the first place -- I want to learn as much as possible and make the most difference I possibly can.
Still, I can't help but linger on what my clinical instructor said to me when I told her I was thinking about emergency nursing. She said "oh, I don't think I see you there." But just because I'm not the stereotypical hardass (no offense intended!) emergency nurse doesn't mean I couldn't be great at it, right?
I could go on, but I think you get the idea.
Will I love it and thrive, or hate it?
All opinions welcome.