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middleager

middleager

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  1. middleager

    WOW! The public really doesn't like us, huh?

    It seems whether it is a patient or a boss, complaints seem easier to dish out than compliments. I think the number of nurses who ignore or are truely neglient as in the article are a very small minority, as are the patients who are truely morons who think a nurse is their personal nurse or servant. The challenge is how do you get the message out there for people in general recognizing verbally as well as in your heart/mind when you appreciate what someone does for you means more than we realize. After my experience with my parents passing I have made a concious effort to recognize people whether it be a waiter at Red Lobster or my healthcare provider. My dematolist and his staff are some of the most considerate people I have met. I sent them plant and a card at Christmas, my next check up when they logged in on my file, the woman at the desk smiled and said he will be right with you and thanks for the plant and the card. When my MD walks in he opens my file, taped inside the cover is the card I had written. While they were exceptional to start, I felt almost embarassed by how they reacted. Made me realize just how rare it must be for people in healthcare to be recognized. I assumed people said thanks, showed appreciation but from what I read here, doesn't seem so. So, how do we get the message out, when people do good things, recognize them, don't just think about it.
  2. middleager

    WOW! The public really doesn't like us, huh?

    folks, I am an outsider here. I am not a nurse, if i could pick any profession to be in at this point of my life I would love to be a nurse. Not for the money, I am a business man and make more money then I ever thought I would, its a pretty shallow accomplishment. From my experience, from the perspective of my family, and from what I know from talking with others, nursing is one of the most respected and appreciated professions there is. We know when we are in the hospital, nurses do 90% of the care, we know if somehting isn't right it will most likely be a nurse that notices and reports it. There will always be the minority who in this case as in other segments of our society are the most vocal, who will complain, blow things out of proportion, and just plain lie. We are becoming a society of whiners and victims. We have to have a bad guy to be a victim, and we have to have someone to take responsiblity for our bad choices. But rest assured, your work and compassion is recognized and appreciated by the vast majority of society. I lost both of my parents within a few months so I spent a fair amount of time in the hospital, I can honestly say, all but one of the nurses were just exceptional, each and every one exceeded everything my family expected. Even though we lost our parents, we made a donation to the hospital recognizing the NURSES who made their last days, and out time of need as good as it could be. That is what the majority sees, not some sniveling, whinning, whimps who use the anonimity of the net to be victims. Hang in there, you are treasured more than you will ever know.
  3. middleager

    Patients are not consumers

    While consumer may technically apply to patients, I think the term fails to capture the true relationship side of this. Does the public flock to Wal Mart expecting the same intangibles as they do the cardiologist, do we need to feel the cashier with the smiley face button has knowledge, skill, and cares about us? When I pull into the golden Arches, an I carefully analyzing the body language of the kid handing the big mac out the window, was that thank you sincere, did he really mean "have a good day" or was he just saying that? So I agree, consumer may technically apply, but in a loose sense of the word to the point where it doesn't really capture the nature of the interaction. Take it to other aspects of the medical arena, Physcology for example. How do we measure the results of a patient seeking counseling, how do we measure the results. What we see from the patient side is the whole patient experience. I lost a friend awhile back to cancer. He had started treatment, but one day he came home and told everyone he could not do it anymore. He could not make himself go back for treatment that he found so humiliating and degrading that he was just going to let nature take its course. Despite family and friends pleading, reasoning, and pushing he refused to go back and ended up passing away despite the fact that his oncologist said he had a good chance of beating it. The mental/emotional side of the interaction is something that can't be measured, and this is why Nurses tend to be rated higher than Dr.'s, the relationship side of the interaction makes this less of a consumer relationship. I agree with you that there are many aspects that are similar to consumer, but it just doesn't in my mind do justice to it.
  4. middleager

    Patients are not consumers

    dudette10 it really depends what I do when the trust isn't there. In some cases I have been so far into a procedure/process I just close my eyes and hope, other times I have looked for options for someone I trust. Sometimes the intimidation factor or the dispairity in the power dynamic casues me to just take it. This is just so much more personal than any other interaction we will ever have with anyone other than perhaps our family or maybe even just our spouse. Providers will ask questions that I would not discuss with anyone other than perhaps my wife, not even my kids. That is a trust issue, I can tell 3 doctors the same thing, they may or may not all three give me the same answer, but I will bet I will have a differnt level of trust depending on how it is delivered and how I feel about them. I had to have elective surgery, my insurance required a second opinion, I felt so much more comfortable with the Dr who was providing the second opinion (the same opinion), I asked them if they would do it. Why, the 2nd took a little more time, asked me a couple more questions, provided me a couple of options to think about, and acted as if he cared what I thought. The first basically said, this is the problem as I see it and this is what you need to do schedule it with the woman at the desk. It was minor surgery to him, I had questions I needed to ask, he was trying to get out the door. I was sitting on the table, naked from the wasit down with that stupid piece of paper they call a drape wrapped around me, he is standing in the doorway with the door open trying get through my questions to get to the next patient. Even though skill wise he came more highly recomended, I didn't trust that he really cared that much. What builds trust in my eyes, I have to feel you know what you are doing, while I will read up on the proceedures, what is involved, risks, etc. I will have to eventually put my trust in the fact that you know what you are doing skill & knowledge wise. If you make me feel that you care about me, if you care what I think, if you act like the personal aspects of this, my comfort (emotional not just physical), my modesty, my concerns are valid, and make even a resonable effort to determine those I will likely trust you care enough to do what you can to take care of my physical side. Now if you come in drunk, drop stuff all the time, forget why you are there, none of the other stuff will cover it but that builds trust. I think in general that is why nurses rate better than Dr's, they take the time, do the things that makes me feel like they really care about me rather than the procedure. I can't tell you as much about an appendix as I can spandex so I have to trust you have the knowledge, how you will apply that knowledge...I will get a feeling on how you act.
  5. middleager

    Do doctors and nurses hate each other?

    From the outside, while I have seen some Dr's treat the nurses as part of a team, over all my observations has lead me to be less than impressed with how Dr's treat/regard their nurses. I had to see a dermatologist one time after I was burned in a house fire. I went for the first visit, he was fine, the visit went fine, as I was doing the paper work at the end, one of the nurses asked him something and his response was so condensending and snotty I was stunned. He treated her more like a servant than college educated professional. The receptionist asked me if I would like to schedule a follow up, I told her in front of him and the nurse who had been dressed down, "no I think I need to find someone who knows how to treat people, I could never feel comfortable with someone who treats people like that". He looked at me, smiled, shrugged and walked away. His nurse mouthed a "thank you". I don' t know if that tainted my opinion but I really have not been overly impressed with most of what I see, though I understand I don't see it often and I understand it isn't universal,
  6. middleager

    Patients are not consumers

    The idea that patients are mere consumers, no more no less than the guy buying a set of tires or the woman shopping in at a local kroger is ridiculous. I don't need to trust the guy selling me tires, I have run goodyears and firestones all my life, I don't have to trust the cashier at kroger to tell me about the box of wheaties or the Green Giant Green Beans. I have to trust the Dr. and the Nurses to care about me. I do not expect the good folks at Kroger to truely care about me, I expect the obligatory thank you which i really don't expect them to mean, they were trained to say that the same way I train my people to great and thank. I expect the Dr. to care about my physical being, I ecpect them to care enough to do everything they can to keep me healthy, I hope they care about me enough on a personal level to make it personal but I don't really expect that, and to be honest i have come to understand that Dr.'s are so busy they will sometimes they will hurry, short change me, and I need to be my own advocate. Nurses, the majority of nurses I have met truely care about me the person, I think the difference is Nurses care about be the person and apply the skills and knowledge they posses to help that person. Dr.'s see the case first and me....maybe. Nurses get paid the same regardless of how many patients get shoved through, so while they may be overwhelmed with the work load, the financial aspect of the "transaction" vs "interaction" is completely absent. I think this explains why we rate the trust factor of nurses so much higher than we do Dr.s, not that we don't think Dr,'s don't know their trade, we just feel trust is a personal thing, not a physical thing. the level of personal interaction with a nurse is completely different than the Dr. Consumer, you have got to be kidding, you consume gasoline through your car, do you trust the kid behind the cash register in the same way you trust the people working on your heart?
  7. middleager

    Do RN's ever do physical examinations?

    I am wondering if the OP did not mean physical exams in what non medical people think of when one says physical exam ie sports physicals, pre employment, DOT, annuals, etc.
  8. middleager

    Conscience Schmoncience! Who cares what you believe?

    But what about the ones that were already working before it came out, are you really going to have a policy that if you worked before this date you don't have to dispense this but if you started after this date you have to? Is that how we would propose to handle this. Would any one reading this feel comfortable giving their employer carte blanche right to determine what they will and require you to do regardless of your moral or ethical position. Again, if the law changed would you think even the position that nurses working before 5/24/2011 don't have to assist in suicides but those working after do would be acceptable?
  9. middleager

    male in nursing

    I teach a business/economic class at the local HS through J/A. It's focus is on education and job opportunities. I did this thing where I had them hold up their hand to the following questions, how many would consider being a nurse, how about a nurse practioner, how about a doctor. You can guess the result, no males for nurse, 1 for nurse practioner (he had been to one who was male), many males and females for doctor. As we get older our thinking matures with experience. So the challenge is how do I reach a 17-18 year old male who believes nurses are female and nursing not guys work. I would imagine 90%+ of their contact with nurses are female, they turn on TV the nurses are female or in the case of Nurse Jackie they toss in the obligatory gay male. YOU know the true story, but how do I reach the 17-18 year old male that is getting ready to graduate and choose a job path. How do I get them to consider nursing and feel nursing is not just for women. A slogan has to be short and to the point to be used on a billboard. Listing things like pay, what you get to do, the rewards, helping people, opportunity, whatever is to detailed to be used in that media. Anyone got a suggestion for a slogan?
  10. middleager

    Conscience Schmoncience! Who cares what you believe?

    If this were a Muslim Dr. refusing to perform these procedures, or dispense the drug would we have the same discussions. I do not mean that to be critical of Muslims, my point is to a large degree (though not exclusively) this is a Chrsitian issue. While many people and religions oppose abortion, in general we give less issues we identify as Christian since we are so afraid to not be PC. I have seem similar discussions on a different subject. People seem to be much more tolerant of the modesty wishes of Muslim's based on there religous beliefs than they do for the general patient population. While it can be argued this is not a issue of religion, I think by an large it is. So, I would ask again, if this were a person of Muslim faith, would you say force them to do it or the need to leave the profession, Ok, if not, don't see how you can pick and choose who you will and won't force to violate their beliefs.
  11. middleager

    NA guilty of sexually assaulting women and girls while under anesthesia

    The case in NM with the ENT came right out and said it was common knowledge that she was doing this. The nurse who blew the whistle said she made eye contact with the other nurses when it was happening and got a mixture of looks that ranged from disquest and shame that it was happening to amusement. She filed a wrongful termination suit and in her dep. stated that it was commonly felt among the nurses that if they were to go against the Dr. it would be they rather than she that would be punished. She stated several cases where a nurse had reported other problems with a Dr. and the nurse was either transferred or given the cold shoulder. While I can not imagine a nurse or other staff would stand by and watch someone committ a sexual assult including sodomy, one has to wonder if the facility did not have that same pressure that the nurses felt threatened or intimidated to report it. Doesn't make it right by any stretch of the imagination, but it would be interesting to know what the working environment or culture of the hospital was. There are numerous victims here, besides those that were physically assulted, what kind of price are the other staff at the hospital, and all nurses in general paying for what this guy did, and what a handful possibly allowed. Out of the hundreds of thousands of providers, I would bet 1% or less would do something like this, and even less would watch and allow this to happen, yet all nurses are going to be effected to one degree or another. I imagine by the time the lawsuits are done, it will all come out or perhaps enough money will flow that we will never know who all was to blame. The crime has no limit of victims, neither should his punishment.
  12. middleager

    NA guilty of sexually assaulting women and girls while under anesthesia

    And here in lies another case of the difference in how nurses and Dr's are treated. Granted they happened in different states but the Female Ent ITSOSIMPLE referred to, a Dr. Tawanna Sparks in NM was reported by a nurse who could not take it any longer, The incident was she took a surgery patients penis out slapped it several times and said bad boy bad boy laughing. The nurse was fired or "other reasons" which is being litigated. It turns out the doctor had been doing this type of thing for several years and it was well known in the hospital where she worked. When she was reported the hospital did nothing so she was turned into the state. She not only did not get prison time, she kept her lisc. and continued to work at the same hospital with some restrictions. He deserves to go to prison, but the discrepency in how a male nurse and a female Dr is treated for similar abuses is striking. And they wonder why so many nurses find work unrewarding, stressful, and so many burn out and leave.
  13. middleager

    Thank you, nurses

    Last week we were at a bar having drinks and dinner with some friends. One of my friends is dating an oncology nurse. Someone made some flipant comment about all of the patients that she cares for who pass away along the lines of she is sort of like the angel of death and he better be good to her. You could tell it hit her deep when she quietly responded, we do save some of them. My wife and I talked about what a tough tough job she had and what an amazing person it would take to work in a position where a fair number of people whom you cared for were not going to make it, and you knew it going in and did it anyway. The fact that a person can work in this environment and hold on to the fact that they made a bad situation, often the worst times of peoples lives a little better...says alot about them. I lost both of my parents within three months of each other, both were in the hospital(s) about a week each and I can say out of the dozens of nurses we had contact with, there was only one that was absolutely not exceptional, she was Russian, Ukrainian, something and her level of compassion just wasn's up to par with her co-workers. I made a somewhat sizable donation to the hospital where both started their journey from, with one caveat, the nurses were to decide how the money was spent, they were to purchase whatever they felt would make thier day a little easier. It could be loungers (which they probably would never get to use), capacinno maker, equipment, whatever they wanted. Guess what they picked, reclining chairs that converted to flat beds on wheels so they could wheel them into patients rooms for family to sleep on if they stayed the night etc. They had been dragging regular old recliners in for them. If you want to know what I think of nurses...as a group you won't find any better people anywhere. So let me add my thanks for all you do.
  14. middleager

    The Great Double Standard?

    I don't think this should be tabled as who is worse, who shouldn't be trusted. From my experience I trust all of the nurses that come my way unless one gives me cause to do other wise, which has never happened in my life, quite the opposite. The issue is more societies willingness to impose presupposed discrimination on male nurses and the administration of the hospitals and governing bodies making the decision not to stand up for their nurses. Rather than fight the battle, they force nurses give into the discrimination to protect themselves. I fault the admin and governing bodies not the nurses for allowing this to continue. If they threw themselves behind defending the nurses, this would improve. Not saying there are not bad nurses of both genders, I have never met one but sure they exist. And I am not saying patients request for a specific gender for intimate care should be ignored, but to assume a male nurse should have to have a chaperone for female patients is discrimination flat out and should not be accepted. Change takes time, but it also takes effort.
  15. middleager

    The Great Double Standard?

    What a complex issue, while schools teaching male nurses need to have two people for their protection while females do not may be a double standard and sexist, it is not without reason. On the other hand if we reversed the genders such teaching would be met with loud protests and lawsuits. On the patient side, while male patients may prefer to have same gender for intimate procedures the numbers are against them which supports the hospitals need to ignore gender preference for males since it is harder to provide and the ramifications are less severe since very few males feel comfortable complaining and even fewer will make a charge against providers just becasue they feel uncomfortable or misinterpet care. That said, patients can not hold providers 100% liable for the issue if they are not willing to make their preferences known upfront. I have a preference for same gender for procedures involving exposure, I used to just go with it and be ticked at providers. Once I started asking I found out providers were more than willing to accomodate when they could. My anger was misplaced, while I agree in many cases females don't have to ask, they are just accomodated, in many cases males don't ask and just get ****** afterward. I have found most providers to be very sypathetic to my requests far more than I antcipated or gave them credit for. So you can't dump the whole blame on the providers when many male patients don't let them know upfront.
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