I think I am dealing with a possible stress reaction to my last job, in home hospice. I don't want to use the term PTSD because that's very strong. But I've noticed that I have some concerning behaviors. For the last year-ish, I've been teaching ESL and avoiding working as an RN.
My last job, which was over a year ago, was full of manipulative staff. Examples:
-support staff calling 4-5 times "to talk about a patient", wanting to have 20 minute conversations to report that the patient is normal/to complain about patient's idiosyncracies. I would advise REPEATEDLY that we do not need phone report (lasting 15-20 minutes) for this, written report as normal is appropriate. Staff called management to report that I "refused to help with patients".
-other nurses and CNAs flooding my phone with calls at 8:30-9am daily to say good morning. When I do not respond, staff request that we have a mandatory conference "good morning" call each morning. I state that this is not productive as we need this time to make patient calls. People are offended. We do this time-wasting good morning conference call for about 3 weeks and then people lose interest.
-staff calling me during hours I was not scheduled on call to ask about patients. I would report that I was not on call and provide telephone number for on call nurse. Again staff complained to management that I refused to help with patients.
-staff calling to report (for example) we are using a different type of briefs this week as our supplier did not have our usual type. I did not call back for this as it did not require a response. I was reported to management as "not answering phone calls". (I was busy calling patients/families).
-management calling intermittently during the day to ask what I am doing right now in a suspicious tone, as if they do not believe I am working. Clearly I am working. When I report that I am working, they wish to have a conversation about how I am doing "emotionally". I report "doing fine and able to perform my job" and they do not like this.
-management calling me into the office for meetings weekly to complain about my interactions with staff. I was written up for "poor communication with staff" because I stated repeatedly that I do not like to talk about my personal life at work and refused to have conversations about my personal life. I was told by my supervisor that I need to talk to other staff "about normal things, like your family, how things are going at home. You don't visit with anyone." I refused to sign the write-up because "poor communication" implies communication about WORK RELATED matters. I was told that if I didn't spend some time sitting around the office visiting each day after my workload was completed that I would probably be written up again.
-management calling patients' families to solicit complaints when the service was satisfactory. One patient's wife told me "they keep calling and trying to get me to complain about something, but I'm happy with you". One supervisor went so far as to call and tell a family that maybe the patient should be taken to the ER because I missed something on my assessment (the patient was asymptomatic, and I had not missed anything. The family was extremely alarmed by this.)
-even after I quit this job (when I finally went to the office to give notice, I almost cried during the meeting because I was so frustrated and sick of this job) people from the company continued to call me, hanging up instead of leaving a message. I had to block people's phone numbers (obviously I could see who was calling, are these people idiots?)
So for the last year-ish, I've been having this thing where I avoid interactions with people. I avoid my phone like the plague, and when my phone rings I become really agitated and sometimes yell "who the f is calling me!" When people ask me how I am doing emotionally I become very defensive because I feel they are trying to find something to hold against me. I resent receiving calls and texts, because I'm afraid it's going to be someone trying to pick a fight. It's worse in the morning, when I typically had more problems at work. Has anyone experienced this?