does the FOB really get cursed out????

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

hello everyone:

I am a future nursing student and there's a question I've always wanted to ask this question. On TV and in movies, when showing a mother giving birth, they show her yelling at the fob, saying things like "I hate you!", or "You will never touch me again after this!".....What is it really like in the delivery room? Is the MOB really cursing at the father? I would really like to know.

I don't hear many mom's cuss the father, but I did hear one very upper-middle-class-dignified-lady-type threaten to "string the anesthesiologist up by his b@lls" if he didn't hurry up and get there to give her an epidural. She was about 8cm at the time. You should have seen the look on her husband's face. It was obvious to everyone in the room that this was VERY out of character for her. :lol2:

0 Votes

If you really want to get a dirty look, just ask a mom fresh after delivery when she plans to have the next child. :lol2:

0 Votes

I've observed women cussing in general, usually it's not aimed at one specific person...unless its the nurse who's doing a lady partsl exam or trying to help get her back in control. I've seen a few women take a swing....

I think cussing out the FOB comes from the "old days" when the man "knocked up" the woman...

0 Votes

Giving birth is a difficult experience - allowing a woman to verbalize frustrations is perfectly fine.

I was at the end of my rope at one point when my husband was telling me I was going great . .. .I knew I wasn't . . .I told him very quietly to "shut up".

Whoever the birth coach is - you prepare them for transition time. A woman can lose control.

But the old stereotype of a woman cussing out her husband . . . rarely happens.

steph

0 Votes

Well, we've had here that it never happens, rarely happens, and happens sometimes. So, OP, take your pick. It's all the luck of the draw.

0 Votes

I really haven't seen anyone really cursed out the FOB, but just cursing out in general. One time I had seen a girl give the FOB a full contact kick to the chest though. I just said to her, "He's a really nice guy and he's here with you." In retrospect I should have been a little more forceful with her; however, she didn't do that again.

FWIW, she had a lot more problems going on than the 33-weeker she was about to deliver. Don't want to elaborate too much, but she really did.

0 Votes
Specializes in Labor & Delivery.

I had a teen delivering a term baby who was so nasty and vile to the FOB that he left the room for a bit while she was pushing. She also swatted at him with a towel and snapped at everyone- except for the nurses!!!

She seemed much sweeter the next day, lol.

0 Votes
Specializes in Mother/Baby;L/D.

yea it definitely depends..but the mother can do a complete 180 degrees in regards to her personality. Ive left a room, to have a nice pt breathing well through her contractions...only to see a completely "different" woman emerge as her contractions intensify.

Ive only had a couple of women curse out their support person..but one pt i will NEVER forget insisted on BITING her husband's hand to reliever her pain. She stated that "he was the one that did this" to her. We all tried to prevent her from biting him, but it was hopeless (she was unable to get her epidural bc anesthesia was tied up in a complicated c/s). Poor dad had cuts up and down his hand, but he was stoic, and took the biting!!

0 Votes

I've worked OB for a little over 3 yrs and seen FOB cussed out a few times; usually by the same women that are yelling "Get this F***ing thing out of me!" Actually had a FOB one time that pt said she needed something to bite on and he offered his hand! Of course, he had been out drinking with his buddies and came home to find her in labor, so maybe he was feeling guilty. (I provided her with a cloth to bite on) Have seen a few uninvited bites, too, but mostly "shut up" "don't touch me", etc.

0 Votes
Specializes in L&D all the way baby!.

Not too many cussing at the FOB BUT I did have a gal kick the MD in the head while trying to get up off the bed during 2nd stage and a gal who told me if she didn't get an epidural she was going to "rip our [i'm guessing me and the other nurse in the room] heads off". To which I replied..."please don't, my children expect me to come home after this shift".

I personally remember telling my husband, during our last (and final.. he had just had a vasectomy 3 weeks prior) that I was "ALL DONE". Which would have been funny if I had said it once but I think I said it repeatedly for about 30 minutes during transition. "I'm ALL DONE. I'm ALL DONE. Hey just in case you didn't know (to everyone who came in).. I'M ALL DONE!"

0 Votes

How many of you have had labor checks with a multip with a new boyfriend......you know they have had an argument ( or worse ) and she comes in with dramatic complaints which turn out unfounded as she knows the ropes and is trying to scare the s--- out of him or " pay him back ". Same thing happens in labor, they are G5 with no problems and are screaming at 2 cms as he has never done this before and they are so needly for attention. Their little eyes bug out and they probably wish they had kept their pants zipped up.

0 Votes
Specializes in Case Management.
I tried to bite his hand. .

I did the same thing with #2! Well, he deserved it, he was holding on to the side rails saying, "it will be ok, it will be ok, it will be ok" I just wanted him to stop saying it would be ok!!!

0 Votes
+ Add a Comment