My cousin's little boy (will be 6mo next week) has RSV. He's in the pediatric ICU on a venatalator, and "critical but stable" according to what she's been told. I TOTALLY understand that she's scared and worried, I would be too, but she keeps calling me and asking me if his nurses and doctors are doing the right things or if certian things are "good or bad". I told her the best I could do is give her my VERY LIMITED knowledge and tell her what questions she should ask. I told her I would be happy to look up his medicines in my drug guide, and tell her everything I can find on RSV, but I don't really know much else to do! She told me that her son's nurses seem to keep getting fustrated when she doesn't understand something and that's why she calls me so that "I can help her understand".
I told her that if she doesn't understand to keep asking for clarification, because I don't have a licence, I don't have his chart, and I wouldn't even know how to understand that information if I did have it because I haven't learned it yet!
I know she's worried, (I know I would be) how can I get her to understand that just because I'm in school to be a nurse that I'm not one yet? I'm concerned that she is looking to me for answers instead of with her little boy's Nurses and Docs.
Before you start yelling, while don't you look at her JOIN DATE ! She joined last JANUARY 2007 ! (if I'm wrong please forgive me) :wink2:
And your point?
Many people join before they are in nursing school. Many people are members and aren't nurses or in nursing school at all.
If you look at any of her other posts, you'd see that she says she starts in January. So:banghead: back at you.
Even if she had been in school for a year, she is still not involved in the child's medical care and cannot provide an educated opinion because she doesn't have the full view of the case or the experience.
I know family did this to me when I was in school. It was annoying. I had to tell them I was a student and they should speak with a professional.
The ONLY information I have given is from personal experience (my kids being sick/in the hospital, or because I have learned the information through other sources. I DO NOT/ WILL NEVER pretend to know something I don't!!! I ALWAYS make sure I tell her to check everything with her son's nurses and docs! My cousin is more like a sister to me than a cousin, we grew up next door to each other and I love her dearly. Who care's if I've started classes yet, it doesn't mean I don't know basic medical info! I've taken all pre reqs and we were taught some basic nursing stuff. Im not pretending to know things i don't.
Specializes in med/surg, telemetry, IV therapy, mgmt.
you could very well be getting these same questions from the mother of a patient. what would you say to her? "i don't have a license." "i don't have his chart." "i wouldn't even know how to understand that information if i did have it because i haven't learned it yet!" step back and read what you posted! what would your instructors say to you if they heard you tell the mother of your patient those things?
be honest. be open. there is nothing wrong with saying you don't know and that you need to look it up. it also empowers someone to show them how to do it themselves. "i don't know. let's find out what we can so we both know more."
I'm only a medical transriptionist right now and even when I started doing this, people would ask me medical questions all the time. People asked me to interpret MRIs, find out about their medicines, their illnesses, tell them if their doctor is doing things right (!) and so on. It is amazing that on the whole there is so little faith in medical professionals, but with my current job, I can also understand a little bit why it is that way. You would not believe the stuff I hear.
Who care's if I've started classes yet, it doesn't mean I don't know basic medical info!
I've taken all pre reqs and we were taught some basic nursing stuff.
Pre-reqs of A&P do not teach you "basic nursing stuff."
Because you have no nursing /medical education your basis of basic medical knowledge is probably equivalent to her's.
And it is true that it doesn't matter that you've not started school as to whether or not you should be giving medical advice. One way or another- you shouldn't. And you know that. That's the whole reason behind your vent, I assume.
It does matter if you've started in relation to what information you are giving out. You will be amazed at how much you learn once you start school. You will also be amazed about how many things you thought you knew but were wrong.
Hope your cousin's little man gets to feeling well soon!
My appologies, I didn't intend my "basic nursing stuff" comment to mean that I know how to be a nurse, but that I know BASIC info about what is "normal" (babies have higher heart rates and the like). I have only said what I'm SURE about (things I have learned either from my own kids or in textbooks), and even then I tell her to ask his Docs and Nurses!
You know, until you've stared at all those monitors hooked up to your baby, it's hard to understand how difficult it is. The doctors/attendings/residents/respiratory therapists/nurses/students/environmental people all look the same, and they change every 12 hours, sometimes more.
All your cousin wants is someone who she feels she can trust, to sort through the jargon and promise her that her son is in the best hands. Don't give her info you're not qualified to give, but understand that a lot of her problem just needs a sounding board to bounce off of. Also, maybe offer to pray with her, for her to be at peace with the care her son is receiving.
hugs to you and the little one. this must be very hard on you also, being far away, but also feeling like your cousin is your sister. being a sounding board for your cousin is important right now, and she wants to hear that she has asked all the right questions. also, sounds like the two of you are very close and it wouldn't matter that you are going to become a nurse, she wants your experience as a mom, and she trusts you. it sounds to me like you are supporting her in the way that she needs and we all need to lean on someone during times like this. :yeah:even after you finish school and start working it is amazing how many "specialties" are out there for nurses. many times you will have to say "i just don't know that". hang in there, my prayers are with you and your family. :redpinkhe (maybe some of the harsh answers were just from someone having a bad day.)
I know exactly how you feel. Everyone in my family expects that I can diagnose them. I have to tell them that I know nothing and that the doc knows best (or at least I hope so!). I have even given my sister-in-law the pediatric nurse hotline to a local hospital so that she can direct her questions elsewhere!
I agree that your cousin is likely scared and seeking confirmation. The best way to help is to tell her you care.
(if I'm wrong please forgive me) :wink2:
NurseLoveJoy88, ASN, RN
3,959 Posts
Before you start yelling, while don't you look at her JOIN DATE ! She joined last JANUARY 2007 !
(if I'm wrong please forgive me) :wink2: