Nursing School Blues

[B-I-J-O-U-X]

So I am a 3rd semester student in my program and am seeing that this is really an experience I had no idea that I was ready for (just wasn't prepared for the level of intensity)...I mean things that are occurring that in otherwise normal "bubble world", would be considered egregious, and never happen. I used to think that nurses were kind and compassionate...but I realize that the cliche "nurses eat their young" has circulated around a while, and whether or not that is true, I am starting to wonder if if has anything to do with RN school.

I am seeing instructors demean and humiliate students for asking "ridiculous" questions, I am seeing exams with material never covered, or material on upcoming lectures for future exams not even touched, I am seeing the student body deconstruct against each other and administration not resolve, I am seeing instructors who are literally, just reeling in the wrath of nursing school and making life absolutely miserable just because they can (as in, >500 slides in like 3 days until exam, *****!) These have been some of the best and worst times of my life. But despite all the ups and downs, I can't wait until I graduate! I can't wait to work!!!!!

So my main question is this...I have a peer who has failed every exam in this class. I am fortunate to NOT be in that boat...but tbh I guess any one of us could, it feels like with any slight move we are 2 mm from losing our career pathway, it's awful to feel like that... She knows the material, she is solid. I guess she is just psyched out about the tests, idk, but I feel badly for her. She relayed a story where one of the instructors basically told her in so many, no uncertain terms, that she really needs to just leave the program. I have heard other friends in other programs where the instructors have advised students to do the same...like talk them into leaving the program. I understand that institutions wants the cream of the crop, but at some point in time, I would think that a nurse (you know, the iconic Florence Nightengale compassionate person) would step up and say "okay listen, you've been knocked down but let's figure out how to make this work...". I mean for Godsakes, we are paying thousands of dollars to be there and, is that not funding their salaries? So she is basically paying for this man to say this to her? I don't understand...

QUESTION: why is it that so many schools discourage their students from progressing? It seems inhumane, especially with all of the other things we have going on in nursing school. This is hard work! (And are other schools outside of Illinois like this too? Is this a typical nursing school?) *sigh* I am just trying to understand...makes no sense.

[Pangea Reunited, ASN, RN]

If someone is failing every exam, regardless of the reason, they're far from "solid". Honest feedback in not inappropriate, even though it may not feel good to hear. Some people really are better off cutting their losses and moving on to something they're more capable at.

[SnowShoeRN]

I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. Nursing is unlike any other major. We have our trials and triumphs that other people can't really understand and you do need to possess a certain level of independence and maturity with your learning and initiative that other majors don't really need to worry about. I'm not saying you don't. 500 slides is ridiculous. But seeing material on exams that was never covered in class is something you'll encounter.

As for your friend, I'm sorry she isn't doing well but just because someone is paying thousands of dollars for an education doesn't mean they should get waved through if they aren't passing exams. Another way nursing is set apart from other disciplines is that it's incredibly important that students really know their stuff. While the first hurdle is passing the NCLEX, we ultimately do have other's lives in our hands. If we can't prove to instructors that we can't regurgiate the basics on written exams, how are they to know that we'll be able to do so in the heat of the moment with the S is hitting the fan at the bedside? If you're convinced she knows what she's doing, but doesn't test well, maybe she should seek out testing for a learning disability. I did have a few people in my program who had a few special needs when it came to learning and test taking. Sometimes special accommodations can be made.

Otherwise, she may just have to choose another career path. In any event, I wish both of you luck with your futures.

[Purple_roses]

Florence Nightingale was, first and foremost, concerned for the wellbeing of her patients. And if you take a peak at nursing history, she was incredibly picky/borderline discriminatory about who she would allow to be a nurse.

Instructors care about us, but their jobs are NOT to ensure we're happy. Their jobs are to ensure that competent people are caring for patients.

[Libby1987]

You might find yourself as shocked to the reality of working conditions and expectations as you are with school.

And no one should be able to buy their way through school. The fact that they're discouraging her seems the ethical and pragmatic thing to do.

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

If someone is failing every exam, regardless of the reason, they're far from "solid". Honest feedback in not inappropriate, even though it may not feel good to hear. Some people really are better off cutting their losses and moving on to something they're more capable at.

I totally concur...I would hate to sound unsupportive, but we all cannot be anything that we want to be. This is a cold, harsh reality.

My neighbor Bobbie might yearn to be a nurse. She might have even been accepted into a nursing program. Yet, if she lacks the academic horsepower to comprehend the material and apply it astutely to answer exam questions at the analysis level, she will not be a nurse. Intellect cannot be taught to a grown adult in college...sorry.

It is fortunate that not everyone can be whatever they want to be. Otherwise, we'd have 20 million nurses in America, leading to a scarcity of jobs, lower pay, and deteriorating working conditions. Failure has positive aspects because we can learn from it, try again, or gravitate toward something else that suits their capabilities.

[margin261]

A few things came to mind as I was reading your post- I hope I can remember them all in mine...

First... I am soooo glad I'm not in school anymore! It was one of the most difficult & challenging times of my life- but ultimately it was exhilarating & satisfying as well, especially when I was done.

Next, everyone is right- nursing is like no other major. I went from pre reqs where you learned a subject & were tested on the subject to nursing program to where they taught on some stuff, some you were expected to read/learn on your own (& yes, massive amounts of info) & the tests were nclex style where not many questions were content based but critical thinking as to what you would do with the info you learned. It was a shock to my brain & took me- all of us- a bit to get into the groove. (My advice to all nursing students is to get nclex books/ apps on your phone & answer as many questions as you can in your copious amts of free time to train your brain)

Which leads to the next point... Most instructors do want you to learn. Yes, I too had that one sadistic instructor that was rude, condescending & terrorized everyone. I think there is one at every school. But overall, schools are mainly concerned with nclex pass rates. That's what attracts students, keeps their accreditation & brings in more money.

When a few students are failing abysmally, they aren't thinking of losing next semesters tuition, they're thinking- and rightly so- if that student manages to graduate, they probably won't pass nclex & it'll look bad on them. Which can cause them bigger problems than a couple of tuition payments. Harsh, but true.

Tell your friend it'll look better if she resigns than fails out, btw. She can always re-enroll & try again.

Ok- thats all I can remember that I wanted to say, except that I wish you heaps of good luck and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. It won't last forever. It's difficult but very much worth it!

[B-I-J-O-U-X]

@ PANGEA

Thanks for replying. I hear you, but I have to disagree to an extent... I think we all know the NCLEX questions aren't exactly easy. Okay, I get it. But I think to make it this far in nursing school, you either know your sh** or you don't. Two components:1-book smarts, and 2-application smarts. So if she is rattling off interventions and patho off the top of her head without missing a beat, I'd defintely put some money on her for being solid. Application questions are hard. And I understand that it takes a special someone to critically think, however, it is true that some people are just horrible test takers. Additionally, if you look at this URL, you will find household names: Bill Gates, Michael Jordan, Thomas Edison, Beethoven, Henry Ford, Stephen King, Einstein, and the list goes on, of people who failed and were discouraged...

Famous Failures | The Creativity Post

and look how they turned out. My point is, regardless of whether or not she deserves her spot in the program or not, I think that the instructors can downright be brutal. It's not just her...it is the attitude of the instructors in general. I think nursing school is where the "toughen up" attitude is cultivated...and I don't think it's a way to initiate newbies into the profession.

[B-I-J-O-U-X]

@ Snow

Yeah I agree...and I don't think she should be waved through bc she's footing a huge bill. I just think because of that, they can be selective with what they say to her or at least how they "discourage" her from the program... As for me, collectively, has definitely been an eye opener...not just my friend but really the ups and down. It's the best and worst time of my life, haha! But I love where I am and I would not change it for the world!

[B-I-J-O-U-X]

@ Commuter

There is merit to what you and Pangea state. See my reply to Pangea, applicable to both... All I am trying to say is, why is there a culture of being so brutal in nursing. Period. My friend was my example, and I understand (and agree) with the reason why she shouldn't be there. But that really is not for me to judge. I don't know her situation. I more disturbed by this mentality of being insensitive and tactless about interactions. Example: if I raise my hand in class about something the instructor has said, why should I be yelled at and humiliated for asking a question? That is *** class is for...to learn! Okay, so I stay after class, and I still can't ask a question because I am interrupted constantly and the instructor is too good to have his time wasted with such a beginner. Rude. Just plain rude. It's the attitude of nastiness across the board. Another example: in clinical rotation the staff nurses are making disparaging remarks about us students. ***** Like they weren't students either? We can't sit in for report bc it's bothering them, we can't ask questions because they straight up ignore us, etc etc. How are we to learn? Whether it is my friend or in clinicial or in class, I see a pattern of nasty attitudes. I'm saying, what is going on here?! Is that how nurses really should - and want - to be perceived?! In my case, if I ask a question and I am yelled at and humiliated, that is straight up BS. If I cannot ask a question then *** am I supposed to do? I am paying money to sit in that seat, after all. And I AM passing my classes, I don't get BS grades, so what is the instructor's excuse then? See what I mean. Just makes no sense. Food for thought.