Nursing School Blues - I feel trapped!

Nursing Students General Students

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I'm sitting here in my bedroom, mindlessly scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed. In the back of my mind is the nagging reality that in just a few hours my freedom will come to conclusion, that my joy will be spoiled by time constrains and all the other evils that come with this profession. I ponder about how my day will go. I begin to feel uneasy at the thought of reliving past nightmares, and my heart races just thinking of my impending hours of doom. My mind contemplates all the possibilities. A drug addict patient that saps my energy and time, rendering other patients with less care. Perhaps being understaffed and experiencing that anxiety that I will never catch up, that time has become my nemesis. Perhaps it'll be the kind of day that my patience will be challenge by unruly family members. Perhaps it will be day I am not able to adequately nurture my body the nutrients it needs. Perhaps it'll be the type of day where all I can do is let the tears stream down in the solitude of the restroom. Perhaps it'll be the kind of day where my lack of time is translated to patient as lack of care. Perhaps it'll be the day that all my walls come closing in and that my skies fall and I say enough is enough and leave this profession forever - that situation is my most feared. Hunger and the need for a roof keeps my torture alive, and my torture keeps me alive.

Specializes in General Surgery.
I had to laugh a little at this. I vote to keep this in the Nursing Student forum d/t lack of maturity on the part of the OP. If you want to be treated like a real (read, professional) nurse, it would behoove you to act like one even in an anonymous forum.

I wish you all the best as you (rightly, IMHO) re-examine your career path.

I will act professional at work, and vent and rant and do such here. I'm not hurting anyone by completely expressing the dread I feel. YET I am being attacked for thinking bedside sucks.... by some people who haven't worked a ward in their entire lives! That's some funny stuff.

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And you haven't even entered the world of nursing to be any type of judge as to why I feel this way.

Stay in your lane.

I don't care why you feel this way. The fact that you already have your little woe is me attitude is the problem. But you're just a pup. Bless your heart kiddo, I hope you figure yourself out.

Your original post mentioned nothing about disliking a certain aspect of your job...you were "tortured" by the whole darn thing, then backtracked for appearances sake. Why do you care what I think? You seem very insecure about your own feelings...maybe you should deal with that first.

And you're 22...it's very easy for you to change your career. Get over yourself.

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Maybe switch to another unit? OB is a very happy place to be in. Or maybe become an NP and specialize in one specific area. Take care :)

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My work environment is actually pretty good, I'm just not a spontaneous person. Not knowing what will be there when I get there is what kills me. Our ratios, patients (most of them), CNAs and charge nurses are great 99% of the time.

Have you thought of switching to a different unit or specialty? I used to feel the same way when working CCU and ER. I found that with my personality I needed some degree of predictability and so I switched to cardiac rehabilitation. Of course there is some degree of risk with these higher acuity cardiac patients but I knew with absolute certainty I wouldn't have new critical patients flying in, I knew we would be reasonably staffed and I knew I wouldn't get five admits and 3 discharges all in the same day. It was a godsend for me!

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Specializes in General Surgery.
I don't care why you feel this way. The fact that you already have your little woe is me attitude is the problem. But you're just a pup. Bless your heart kiddo, I hope you figure yourself out.

Your original post mentioned nothing about disliking a certain aspect of your job...you were "tortured" by the whole darn thing, then backtracked for appearances sake. Why do you care what I think? You seem very insecure about your own feelings...maybe you should deal with that first.

And you're 22...it's very easy for you to change your career. Get over yourself.

This is the thing. As much torture as this job is, it's affords me food in my belly and a roof over my head in a nice neighborhood. As much as things can suck, I'm not one to quit. So, I will not change careers anytime soon. I will ride this out until I find my niche within nursing.

My original post actually was detailed as to what I dislike. I dislike dealing with drug addict patients. If that makes me the big bad nurse, so BE it. The day your other patients are suffering because of the demands of a seeker, tell me how you feel. I dislike the time constraints and when everything that can go wrong does go wrong at the same time. These ARE specific things. When you're the nurse you're seen as THE one to blame, pass on to, redirect to, so on so forth. You will understand this when and if you graduate. If pharmacy makes a mistake ... If the MD makes a mistake ... if housekeeping didn't clean the window sills adequately ... if dietary brought ceasar instead of ranch ... it falls upon YOU. Perhaps this is the most frustrating part of nursing and the point you are missing.

I don't care what you think per se, but if you're going to make a leap into this profession don't come in with some idealized notions. Because everything is your fault, even if it really wasn't. Simply because you're in the line of fire as the nurse.

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This is the thing. As much torture as this job is, it's affords me food in my belly and a roof over my head in a nice neighborhood. As much as things can suck, I'm not one to quit. So, I will not change careers anytime soon. I will ride this out until I find my niche within nursing.

My original post actually was detailed as to what I dislike. I dislike dealing with drug addict patients. If that makes me the big bad nurse, so BE it. The day your other patients are suffering because of the demands of a seeker, tell me how you feel. I dislike the time constraints and when everything that can go wrong does go wrong at the same time. These ARE specific things.

You're incredibly young. If you're going to change careers, now is the time to do it...you'll figure that out in 5 or 10 years when you're 30 and you realize enough is enough and you have to start over.

And good point. I should have said you only originally talked about the things you disliked and how "tortured" you were by going to work every day. Way to get me on a technicality. I think/hope you got the point, though.

Good luck to you in whatever you decide to pursue after nursing.

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Specializes in General Surgery.
You're incredibly young. If you're going to change careers, now is the time to do it...you'll figure that out in 5 or 10 years when you're 30 and you realize enough is enough and you have to start over.

And good point. I should have said you only originally talked about the things you disliked and how "tortured" you were by going to work every day. Way to get me on a technicality. I think/hope you got the point, though.

Good luck to you in whatever you decide to pursue after nursing.

I understand what you mean.

What I mean is that I'm staying in nursing. Not bedsid, but nursing. Unfortunately a job like preoperative nurse educator, case management, or nursing professor (my best days are days when a nursing student follow me, they allow me to slow down enough to explain things to them where I also see the big picture myself) require some years at the bedside. Not as a form of "pay your dues" but because while those jobs may not require as many skills, they do require the knowledge that is obtained from the one and only, the bedside.

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Specializes in Vents, Telemetry, Home Care, Home infusion.

Because thread mistitled,will leave in student forum.

Your profile states:

I am a brand new graduate nurse with 6 months of experience thus far and counting.

Much of the "torture" you are experiencing is the shock of reality of nursing as a new grad, having a FT career and learning to deal with persons from various walks of life-some who act out inappropriately along with learning to deal with the various "unknowns": new diseases, meds, patient care activities + procedures and communication with healthcare team members.

I heard similar laments from my 28yo son as he embarked on career as diesel truck mechanic "if I don't get truck repairs done fast enough and properly, loose engine could kill someone when truck on highway" He'd call almost daily to ask mechanic father for advice re tools, dealing with management and dealing with irate truck drivers etc.

First year in any new career can be terrifying. In the days of paper kardex and metal charts, took me 2 years to stop from calling unit questioning if I charted med, gave full patient info in report, transferred patient quickly enough to CCU so they didn't die, etc when I had several days off or went on vacation.

First Year After Nursing Licensure forum offers members advice and support to get through this time. Remember when venting not to make posts literally about you/me --thread edited and closed as gone haywire.

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