Anyone else terrified for your parents/loved ones?

Sarah Kat · Jan 5, 2004

My dad got LTC insurance. It's really expensive, but it will allow him to stay in his home and have a home health nurse. He's in good health now, and that's a ways away, but he's being honest with himself about the future. Part of it is his parents are totally stubborn and are still at home without any nurse at all and my grandfather is in his 90's. He worries constantly for them and doesn't want me to have to go through that.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jan 5, 2004

A CNA i worked with helped (heh) me with a pt. i had been assigned to, since he'd slid down in the bed. She actually yelled at him "what's wrong with you that you slide down in the bed??? GAWD!!!". After getting over my disbelief, i said "Think of this man as your FATHER. Wouldn't YOU knock the crap out of the person who ever talked to him this way?? I promise tomorrow you'll be fired." Which she was. But i'll always wonder how many other people before and after she's ever talked to this way.

I always say to myself "This is not my pt. whatsoever. This is someone's husband, father, brother, son."

I treat somoene like they are my dad, that's a guarentee they will get the best care ever.

Dixen81 · Jan 5, 2004

When my dad got to the point of needing constant care, I moved him into my house and cared for him myself. There is no way, no how, that I would have ever put him in a nursing home. He was there for me all my life, and I was determined to be there for him no matter what it cost. I'm so glad I did. He was happy and comfortable, and although it was hard for me at times, I cherish the time I had with him before he passed away. I wouldn't change it for anything.

jschut, BSN, RN · Jan 5, 2004

Originally posted by LPN2Be2004
A CNA i worked with helped (heh) me with a pt. i had been assigned to, since he'd slid down in the bed. She actually yelled at him "what's wrong with you that you slide down in the bed??? GAWD!!!". After getting over my disbelief, i said "Think of this man as your FATHER. Wouldn't YOU knock the crap out of the person who ever talked to him this way?? I promise tomorrow you'll be fired." Which she was. But i'll always wonder how many other people before and after she's ever talked to this way.

I always say to myself "This is not my pt. whatsoever. This is someone's husband, father, brother, son."

I treat somoene like they are my dad, that's a guarentee they will get the best care ever.

Know what's really sad? I have worked in the same LTC for 2 years. This one certian CNA has climbed into bed with a resident to "Hold her down" by putting her knee on the res wrist, has cursed at residents adn done numerous other things to these people. I have reported till I am blue in the face and NOTHING happens to this girl! She has dropped quite a few folks, with the most recent being just the other night, NOTHING is done to this girl! She is rough, rude and generally sucks as an aide. Yet, NOTHING is done. Why? I imagine cause the administration needs a warm body to fill the spot. Who knows. This is part of the reason I am leaving to a new job tomorrow.

And as far as my Mom being in a nursing home. No. A huge resounding no! As long as I have breath in my body and am able to work, my Mom will not go to a nursing home unless her mind is so far gone that I cannot take care of her 24/7 (Such as dementia). I am going to get my BSN and will sock away enough money to help her till the end if I can. And with the good Lord above, I know I can.....

Chaya, ASN, RN · Jan 5, 2004

Had both my folks through a number of health-care institution both before and after I was in nursing. Get to know as many as possible of the caregivers who will be involved with your loved one. Try to be as much of a presence as you are able without actually being in their faces. Being in healthcare you probably have some idea of what needs to be done and where you can help without overstepping bounds. Communication is key-let them know if you gave Mom a drink or snack (if allowed) or washed her up for bed. Ask staff to think if there are ways you can be helpful (you will usually have to say something like "You can get back to me or leave a note when it's not so wild"...).

Chaya, ASN, RN · Jan 5, 2004

There may be quite a gap between what is provided and what is needed. Staying home may depend onwhether there is someone else living there or able to come in several times a day. Will LTC ins provide constant assistance, daily assistance or hour long visits 2-3X/week.

TriskixRN · Jan 6, 2004

I have worked alot in LTC facillities unfortunately what is being described is not that uncommon. I have seen first hand too many abusive caregivers and it has appalled me so much I moved my whole family, sold out of my livestock and farm, and worked about a thousand miles from them in order to make enough money to keep my grandparents and mother in their homes untill their death. My observations have shown me what "poor staffing/short staffing" does in both LTC facillities and in the hospitals. I have been concearned for the patients in every facillity I have ever worked at. There is so many things that get over-looked and left undone or "passed on" I sometimes wonder why I have stayed in Nursing so long. My answere came very surprisingly this last December.... Mom had to have a trach placed and I was the "nurse" that took care of her in the hospital doing the patient teaching / drsg changes / suctioning / cleaning, I also did her bathes, got her meals corrected from the dietary department, and in general did all I would have for any of my past patients even though I was there for her "moral support" I became so frusterated by the lack of care being provided that I stepped in at her request; after the first suctioning I did on her (my finding dried on mucus plaques and at a week s/p trach placement her telling me I was the first to take her cannula out since the surgery) :confused: :angryfire I let the whole nurses station know that I expected them to provide a little better care. Even though I told the supervisors and kept climbing the chain nothing was done to really correct the problem and we were discharged with less teaching than I recieved from the kennel owner when I picked up my new puppy! :chuckle It is sometimes frusterating to be in this profession but love it... the patients really need good nurses! :nurse:

Dixen81 · Jan 6, 2004

I believe that a lot of the problem has to do with the pay. CNAs are grossly underpaid. I wanted to be a CNA for years, but didn't do it because I made much more serving popcorn at the local theatre. It's sad because the patients/residents suffer for it.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jan 6, 2004

I could live with the pay that i'm at now, if i could have some help without the cheap b*st*rds at Corporate saying that it costs too much.

jschut, BSN, RN · Jan 6, 2004

Originally posted by peggysue
I believe that a lot of the problem has to do with the pay. CNAs are grossly underpaid. I wanted to be a CNA for years, but didn't do it because I made much more serving popcorn at the local theatre. It's sad because the patients/residents suffer for it.

I totally agree that CNA's are horribly underpaid, but even if one makes minimum wage, that still gives no right to mistreat patients or misrepresent your job......

We recently had CNA classes at the facility I just left, and I actually had a student aide tell me that the only reason she took the class was to prevent her welfare from being "cut off". They were forcing her to take the class, and to possibly work doing something she had absolutely had no business doing! Why not "train" people like her to do something not detrimental to others health, like picking up roadside trash or something?

There are other things out there people can do, but don't put them in the position to care for other people. It takes a special heart to do a caregivers job, and to do it well.

Dixen81 · Jan 6, 2004

You are absolutely right, Julielpn. I was by no means condoning abuse or blaming it on the low pay. But I do believe if they would pay CNAs better, then there wouldn't be such a turnover and they wouldn't be desperate just to have a warm body fill the position. I believe better pay and working conditions would bring in and keep better staff.