I've been reading a lot of posts here lately about people complaining about nursing schools "churning out nurses", (if I hear that phrase one more time I might throw up in my mouth!) about bad staffing ratios, bad management, bad patients, bad families, bad jobs, bad economy, bad co-workers, bad docs, bad techs, bad hair days and so on ad nauseum.
To all of that, I have one response: Warning, this video is very not safe for work and has "naughty words" in it. If that offends you though, I suggest you harden up even further!
My point with this is that while I fully understand that people love, LOVE to complain endlessly about every little thing, it's easy to forget life's many beautiful things. It's also easy to forget that all the crap you're complaining so tirelessly about usually has a whole other side to it. I'm willing to bet for every "jerk" family member or manager you talk so much garbage about, they've got an equally angry story about this "horrible idiot" nurse they have to deal with. It certainly gives me food for thought when I realize that the people I may want to lash out at so frequently also have their own goals and problems.
What does this have to do with nursing? Everything.
For one, I myself am one of those new grads who was "churned" out according to a great deal of you who believe people like me are worth less than nothing, apparently. As if my schooling was somehow less of a nightmare than yours. And guess what? I actually have a job because I worked my tail off to get it, and spent a lot less time complaining about it on the internet. I honestly believe that we are largely in control of how we respond to what life deals to us, and the endless complaining I have seen on here has really gotten so bad lately that it seems like it's just largely noise when compared to signal.
A little optimism goes a long way. Optimistic people command respect. They don't wait or hope for it. Optimistic people work with their goals in mind, and find no comfort in a lifestyle of complaints and anger. Optimistic people are that way for a reason. There is nothing keeping you or anyone from doing whatever it is in life that you feel needs to be done. If you hate nursing, I mean REALLY hate it, then go find your happiness in life. Irrespective of how great an actor you think you are, you're taking it out on your patients and co-workers and everybody sees it. Don't be THAT guy / girl.
Anyway, as far as the youtube video goes, whenever I find myself getting too bummed out over some ridiculous detail or find myself complaining way more than my fair share, I remind myself to harden up and be the change I want to see. It's good advice for anyone in the world, regardless of their profession.
I was invested in learning a bit more about the book from someone who'd read it and having an intelligent discussion about the book. As usual I will have to stray from these forums to find it.
Thanks anyway though. My interest has been piqued, and I'll probably head down to the library to take a gander.
Probably best considering the main subject of this thread doesn't even have anything remotely to do with the book
Getting back on topic, I can totally understand the OP's point, and no, I'm not just some youngster with no real "clue" of the world. Thanks, OP for a good laugh today
While I agree perception is reality, I have to agree "eternal optimism" is every bit as poinsonous as negativism.
I would never argue that anyone should be blindly optimistic. Just as you said, blind pessimism is certainly every bit as damaging.
At the same time, there are people working in unsafe conditions. Things are being done to make a little more profit that are simply unacceptable. Threads about hot water being shut off during weekends at nursing homes, benefits being "reevaluated" and retirements being lost and many other real life incidents abound.
I was working on a unit recently that thought nothing of giving its night nurses ten patients, all very acute (pulmonary unit), at least half of which were on tele, and pulling our aid to other units hence making us primary care. Now...........unless you are "eternally optimistic" there is just no silver lining there other than dumb luck kept people from dying.
You are 100% right that conditions like this are unacceptable, unsafe and must be dealt with. I am not the kind of person who would look at that situation and say "oh just look on the bright side".
My issue is that people simply take situations like what you described and gripe about them endlessly while doing nothing at all to try and either change that situation, or to change THEIR situation. Like I said above, that's blind pessimism which is every bit as stupid as the other way around. I recognize that there are times in life when you are just stuck, with few options. However I really believe that is the exception rather than the rule. In general, there's at least SOMETHING we can do to try and make our situation better in some way, no matter how small.
I like the video because it's funny. I wonder how old the OP is.
I am more of a realist. I prefer to see things how they are.
I'm a realist too! I believe that no matter how crappy my life has gotten (and trust me, it's never exactly been a free ride) I could always have it much, much worse. That's realism, to me.
Me and some of my friends have a phrase we always use with each other when someone gripes about something completely ridiculous, for example: "oh no! my mcdonald's coffee doesn't have the usual two creams I ask for!" We always reply with "man, those first-world problems are really piling up aren't they?"
Granted, unsafe conditions for us and our patients are much more serious, but that's actually my whole point. That is something worth fighting about and making a fuss. So many other things in life aren't remotely that important, and spending energy on them seems like a lost cause, but again that's just my opinion!
i'm a realist too! i believe that no matter how crappy my life has gotten (and trust me, it's never exactly been a free ride) i could always have it much, much worse. that's realism, to me.
me and some of my friends have a phrase we always use with each other when someone gripes about something completely ridiculous, for example: "oh no! my mcdonald's coffee doesn't have the usual two creams i ask for!" we always reply with "man, those first-world problems are really piling up aren't they?"
granted, unsafe conditions for us and our patients are much more serious, but that's actually my whole point. that is something worth fighting about and making a fuss. so many other things in life aren't remotely that important, and spending energy on them seems like a lost cause, but again that's just my opinion!
when i hear people go on and on with extreme passion about what seem to be really really inconsequential things, i have to wonder if perhaps they have just been really lucky to have never experienced loss or hardship. if you've endured hard times and even tragic circumstances, it's almost impossible to get really worked up about little things. in fact, i used to be like that until life kicked me in the gut. i changed my outlook immediately.
Realist realizes both are missing the point and says "I'm thirsty" and drinks 1/2 glass of water, leaving the optimist and pesamist with nothing to argue about.
Pragmatic says "why did you get such a big glass?":cool:
Optimism is nice, I'm all for optimism.
But it seems you are trying to apply a point of view about how you live your personal life to things that you see in the world external to that. There is a line between personal and professional. What you are able to tolerate for yourself may not be what is acceptable for a patient.
My philosophy is that it is alright to complain, but always with the intent to do it as part of the process of finding a solution to the problem.
As a nurse you are a patient advocate and it is your responsibility to address problems head on and complain about them with the goal toward finding a solution.
There are many things in the world and in this profession tht need to be fixed, many very important things and often that process starts as just a gut reaction to a circumstance that says something is wrong here. Why? Not clear. It just feels bad.
That information then gets conveyed to someone else who says "I wouldn't like that because..." Then on and on until the issue solidifies into something that is either irrelevant or something that really does need to be fixed.
I think most of us on this site are able to distinguish between the two.
Like yourself I'm not all that interested in hearing a lot of useless whining about silly and irrelevant isses. But I'm not going to go from there to saying that if you have nothing positive to say then I'm not really interested in talking to you. Talk away. I'll listen and then I'll choose how to proceed.
I would hate to see a bad patient outcome just because someone complained about something and I just shut them down for being so negative.
So yeah, I'm all on board with the optimism. Just make sure you know where your needs differ from those of your patient's.
I would never argue that anyone should be blindly optimistic. Just as you said, blind pessimism is certainly every bit as damaging.
You are 100% right that conditions like this are unacceptable, unsafe and must be dealt with. I am not the kind of person who would look at that situation and say "oh just look on the bright side".
My issue is that people simply take situations like what you described and gripe about them endlessly while doing nothing at all to try and either change that situation, or to change THEIR situation. Like I said above, that's blind pessimism which is every bit as stupid as the other way around. I recognize that there are times in life when you are just stuck, with few options. However I really believe that is the exception rather than the rule. In general, there's at least SOMETHING we can do to try and make our situation better in some way, no matter how small.
This hospital has thrown up the proverbial white flag and is pretty much focused on making money at this time. I'd say Quality assurance has "taken a back seat", but that'd be giving them too much credit. Its not even in the car anymore.
I'm a firm believer in "voting with your feet." When things are unacceptable, move on. I did. I went to another unit with more realistic ratios and a better schedule for me to boot. From what I understand through text messages, my old unit has gotten worse since I left. People, like me, who are leaving, are not being replaced. Partially because the unit's reputation precedes it and no one in the know will go there. If enough people do this, change will be forced upon them.
Specializes in emergency, neuroscience and neurosurg..
While I agree perception is reality, I have to agree "eternal optimism" is every bit as poinsonous as negativism.
I truly understand where you are coming from. I've had managers who should be shown this thread. Negative negative negative all the time, nothing is ever right. Sour/poisonous personalities to say the least.
At the same time, there are people working in unsafe conditions. Things are being done to make a little more profit that are simply unacceptable. Threads about hot water being shut off during weekends at nursing homes, benefits being "reevaluated" and retirements being lost and many other real life incidents abound.
Negativity breeds negativity. and The morale of most units start with its leadership. If the manager/director/charge nurse is consistently negative then the staff will be too. It begins to poison the entire department. I should also say this is not reserved just for the leadership. Have you ever noticed that one negative person can affect the entire shift.
This does not mean that "eternal optimism" is the answer. Most if not all of my peers and co-workers would laugh hysterically to hear me defined as such. I am all for nurses supporting nurses to find answers for unsafe practice and conditions. I am the original education junkie and shamelessly promote safety/education/accountability. I even get and participate occasionally in the "rant/vent" clearing of the mind and soul. Sometimes just to get it out is the only way to let it go.
My response was more for the nothing is right, everyone sucks, woe is me, I hate my job (facility) and my profession (nursing). There are some people who will attack any and everything someone else does or states (types). It is their own insecurities at work. In order to prove to themselves they are right, they have to prove someone else is wrong. This is not constructive. It is at its best selfish, and at its worst destructive and borders on verbal abuse at times. This attitude is what I was referring to.
Just some final thoughts..... negative + negative = negative. My grandmother taught me two things: 1. If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. 2. It's not what you say but how you say it that matters.
I'm just one person but that's what I think anyway.... does't mean everyone does :twocents:
:twocents:
Jingles39
65 Posts
Probably best considering the main subject of this thread doesn't even have anything remotely to do with the book
Getting back on topic, I can totally understand the OP's point, and no, I'm not just some youngster with no real "clue" of the world. Thanks, OP for a good laugh today