Nurses struggling with mental illness

Nurses Disabilities

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I was just wondering if there are any other nurses who struggle with mental illness. It seems to be one disability that is met with little tolerance and support in the medical field. I do have major co-morbid mental illness, Major depression/PTSD/DID, and have had many problems in my career. I have been in therapy and on meds for a long time and have worked very hard to be functional, and I have suprised myself by what I have been able to achieve. Currently, I am a hospice nurse in a residential setting and it seems that I have found my niche. It doesn't aggravate my illness too much. I am very busy at times and most of my job revolves in much cognitive thinking and decision making about the best ways to respond to a patient's emerging or existing symptoms, and in assessing patients to see where they are in the dying process, plus lots of educating to patients and families. My extensive personal trauma background has made me able to have a different perspective on death and don't see it as the scary thing that is SO SAD, that a lot of people do. Plus, because of the things that I have been through, I am more able to be compassionate and understanding of patients and their fears. I especially do well with patients with existing mental illness or lots of anxiety. I notice that a lot of nurses have little tolerance for a patients anxiety and are not willing to take the extra time to walk them through things and provide the extra reassurance that they need.

Yes, there are some nursing jobs that I don't think I would be able to do because of the fast on the spot life and death action necessary. ER and Trauma/Burn are pretty much out for me. But thats OK. A lot of nurses couldn't handle doing what I do either for their own reasons. We are all suited to certain things.

Having mental illness doesn't automatically make you unsuited for the nursing profession. Even though I have heard many times, "what are you doing here?" "Shouldn't you be doing something else, less stressful?"

I am here and am doing the thing I am suited for. Yes sometimes I have to take time off due to my illness, but its no different than somone who has flare ups of a chronic physical illness like lupus, chronic fatigue, or fibromyalgia.

I would like to know how other nurses have coped with their own illness and their nursing careers.

Severina

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
I just wanted to share some info. that I found when I was in nursing school.

Hope it helps. It made me feel better. It discusses Florence Nightingale and the belief that she suffered with Bipolar disorder.

It wouldn't let me paste the Http: so just look it up by the name of the article:

VA conference diagnosis Nightingale by Ben Karpf

I can see it. But it also bothers me that they want to pathologize her religious experiences and her tremendous talent and intelligence. I suspect sometimes that if I didn't worry so much about my fine self I would be a lot more free and productive than I am myself!

Just random thoughts on an empty stomach with less than 1 cup of coffee on board lol...

I am a disabled RN of 15 years working in cardiac critical care. I am now on SS Disability from Bipolar disorder. I was critically unstable at the time I was accepted on disability. I have had several suicide attempts with the last being a self injection of Pavulon. I have been in therapy for years and on innumerable medications for mood stabilization as well as ECT therapy.

My last year to work was 1999. My Psychiatrist has clearly told me that I should never return to nursing due to the fact that stress triggers my Bipolar symptoms. I decided not to renew my RN license on this account.

Although I receive a disability check, it just doesn't pay the bills. I now have 2 children in college.

I LOVED my job. I have nursing in my blood apparently. It was the most fulfilling 15 years of my life. I had completed my associates degree and was working in an ICU at 18 y/o. I have never regretted my career choice and would love to be working now.

Does anyone have advise for what I do now?? I have to have more income, but if I attempt working again I risk losing my stable health as well as my Social Security benefits. I've thought about Med. Transcription online training, but don't know of anyone that has actually given that a try. I've tried being an Herbalife Distributor as well as being a Home Interior consultant. Sales is not my niche!

I appreciate any response/advise. I want to be productive without risking the financial help I am receiving at this point.

P.S. I just found this site today and have read for 3 solid hours. I MISS DOING WHAT I LOVED SO MUCH! God's blessing to all of you Dedicated Nurses!

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
I am a disabled RN of 15 years working in cardiac critical care. I am now on SS Disability from Bipolar disorder. I was critically unstable at the time I was accepted on disability. I have had several suicide attempts with the last being a self injection of Pavulon. I have been in therapy for years and on innumerable medications for mood stabilization as well as ECT therapy.

My last year to work was 1999. My Psychiatrist has clearly told me that I should never return to nursing due to the fact that stress triggers my Bipolar symptoms. I decided not to renew my RN license on this account.

Although I receive a disability check, it just doesn't pay the bills. I now have 2 children in college.

I LOVED my job. I have nursing in my blood apparently. It was the most fulfilling 15 years of my life. I had completed my associates degree and was working in an ICU at 18 y/o. I have never regretted my career choice and would love to be working now.

Does anyone have advise for what I do now?? I have to have more income, but if I attempt working again I risk losing my stable health as well as my Social Security benefits. I've thought about Med. Transcription online training, but don't know of anyone that has actually given that a try. I've tried being an Herbalife Distributor as well as being a Home Interior consultant. Sales is not my niche!

I appreciate any response/advise. I want to be productive without risking the financial help I am receiving at this point.

P.S. I just found this site today and have read for 3 solid hours. I MISS DOING WHAT I LOVED SO MUCH! God's blessing to all of you Dedicated Nurses!

Welcome. It is good to meet you.

My choice, when I felt ready to go back to work, was to hook up with Vocational Rehab. Ask your social Security office about a "Return to Work" program. They will provide you a counselor, job coaching, classes on return to work, re-education, etc. It enabled me to explore both my interests and abilities. The primary aim was for me to function at my best but not lose my benefits unless I was ready to be un-disabled for sure. A very gradual process. I wish you good luck!

Dear readytolive,

zoeboboey gave you a good answer. My therapist thought I might be ready to work after a year, so she gave me a referral to the "rehab counselor." After speaking with her nurse-to-nurse we decided that I was not, but she gave me good advice about keeping my license as long a I can. In '05 I began to collect SSD (physical disability) checks but they became less and less sufficient for my wife and myself to live on. We relocated to an area which has a much lower cost of living, I applied for my hospital pension, and my wife turned 62 so she filed for SSI.

I am reasonably certain that I will never return to the bedside, but have not ruled out every possible nursing specialty, if only an occasional consultant job, private duty or volunteer work. In March of this year I renewed the license in my old state for the second time since my boss "retired" me in '03. Both 2-yr. renewals required $50 to the state and $20-30 for on-line continuing education, so it costs me $35-40 a year for the privilege of signing "RN" after my name.

The Social Security administration allows us to earn some income. I am sure that a rehab counselor could advise you how much you can earn without jeopardizing your SSD. Once upon a time there were plenty of low-stress nursing jobs, but as with other fields, low stress employment is increasingly an "endangered species." There seem to be fewer employers who will pay us for "sitting around."

Have you contacted your state/provincial board of nursing? They should advise you what you would have to do to reinstate your license. All of the states I have lived in have "reciprocity", meaning that I could get practicing privileges in as many as I can afford. Unfortunately my new home town has only two hospitals and from what I have heard on this site, they are both stuck in the 20th century in terms of pay and nursing autonomy. California is the only state I know of which has patient-load limits established in law, and I doubt that I would (like the ten years I did so) ever want to live there again.

A competent rehab counselor would help you inventory your skills, abilities and interests to help you find work which complies with your stress tolerance and which you enjoy. I would jump at the chance to care for 6 or fewer (healthy) newborns, but I doubt any mother-baby unit would pay RN wages for doing only that. They would more likely "float" me to NICU which is the scariest place I ever saw.:uhoh3:

Welcome to allnurses. I wish you well in your quest for the perfect job.

Sincerely,

Owney

:typing

Thanks for the last 2 post here. It's great to have somebody who understands where I am coming from.

I'm giving these ideas some thought.

As for caring for 6 well babies ---and floating to NICU....OMG..that would be awesome. I guess that is why I got into so much stress. I loved the really critical ones. The sicker, the better. It was more of a challenge and made me think.

Back in the good ole days (lol) when I worked CVICU, my favorite was immediate post op heart patients. It was 1 on 1 then, and you could concentrate your entire energy on recovering that one patient. From what I hear that probable is a thing of the past but it makes me smile just to remember some of the great times I had in Nursing.

Happy Memorial Day to all!

Specializes in behavioral health.

ready to live, i would aim for part time 8 hour DAY shifts.. sleep 8 hours religiously.. and get very regular psych care and therapy. and if it doesnt work. maybe temp nursing jobs? so you dont have to sign a contract.. agency stuff?

night shift is destabilizing my bipolar =( >_<.>

on a different note, im a bit distressed at all the posts about not taking meds for bipolar disorder. the majority of my IP bipolar patients are off their meds. I know that meds are imperfect and trust me ive wanted to quit them as well.. but having bipolar disorder and not being on meds can be very dangerous. Everyone's illness is a bit different, but im concerned that people reading this thread may be encouraged to quit their meds!!

After YEARS & YEARS of finding a medicine that worked...I can't quit it because that along with therapy is the only key to stability with Bipolar. It's so easy to think you don't need the meds when you are in a manic spell.....but then you crash. Been there...DONE THAT WAY TOO MANY TIMES. I finally got the message that the meds are MANDATORY. My husband helps me to stay on track with that.

The biggest problem I see with medications is the cost. Even with my Husband's insurance, my Lamictal has a $100.00 monthly copay. In addition to that, my daughter (18 y/o) was diagnosed last year with Bipolar and takes Lamictal also. That's $200.00 per month not to mention the rest of the meds. So..you buy gas or you buy Lamictal. Without the meds, you can't drive anyway because of the instability of the Bipolar. :banghead:

Hence the whole purpose for my initial post. I need more income!

Don't any of you guys think about trying it off the meds. It just don't work!

Hi guys, It's been a minute, since I posted in this thread. but I have a question, I have applied for SSD, and after a very, very long wait, I will finally be having my day in court, but

now I am scared to recieve benefits,

I am scared they will say you are crazy and take away my license, does this happen, or am I being paranoid:uhoh21:, TIA

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Hi guys, It's been a minute, since I posted in this thread. but I have a question, I have applied for SSD, and after a very, very long wait, I will finally be having my day in court, but

now I am scared to recieve benefits,

I am scared they will say you are crazy and take away my license, does this happen, or am I being paranoid:uhoh21:, TIA

I don't know the answer because I have my license on inactive and haven't tried to activate it since my disability was approved.

Good luck to you!

Poochee,

Everyone's situation is different, but I was never confronted by anyone about taking away my license. I was started on SSD, and kept my license (inactive) for 3 years. I wouldn't let that be the reason I didn't sign up for SSD.

Good luck and relax. Let God handle the big problem. :-)

Specializes in Med surg, Critical Care, LTC.

Hello, I have major depressive disorder and PTSD due in part to my work in the ER and all that I had to deal with there, and a couple of personal tragedies in my life. Anyhooo, I have found my workplace has been anything BUT supportive. With a Psyc diagnosis - it seems my credibility has been obliterated. The respect I worked hard to achieve is gone, and managment doesn't take my concerns seriously.

I work in a small community hospital - so the "gossip grapevine" is always in full swing. If I had had a massive MI, or cancer diagnosis, there would have been major support from co-workers. But a psyc diagnosis! People turn their backs and run.

It's ironic. We have courses that we must take yearly on Healthstream, which our hospital endorses. One subject is how staff working in high stress areas like ICU, or ER are more prone to depression and PTSD - yet they fought my diagnosis every step of the way. I no longer work in the ER, but in PACU. Taking call one night a week and every sixth weekend is killing me. I get no rest, insomnia is part of my diagnosis and illness, and I can't take my sleep meds when I'm on call.

I've been looking, but in this small community, there isn't much out their for employment. Part of my diagnosis is my fear of traveling any distance from home, so traveling to a city 45 min to an hour away, is pretty much out of the question (with gas prices as they are, not sure if it would be cost effective anyway) - so I feel I have no where to turn.

I do understand what it is like to try to keep going with these diagnosis, but it is dammded difficult. Somtimes I think taking a couple of years off to concentrate of recovery would be a blessing, but my mortgage company wouldn't be appreciative of that.

Any suggestions???

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..

I work in a small community hospital - so the "gossip grapevine" is always in full swing. If I had had a massive MI, or cancer diagnosis, there would have been major support from co-workers. But a psyc diagnosis! People turn their backs and run.

It's amazing isn't it?

No advice for you, I am not working in nursing right now and don't know if I ever will - just get the best help that you can and do as much as you can work-wise without hurting yourself. ((((((( Babs )))))))))

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