I'm 26 years old and am at a crossroads--go back to school, or have a couple kids and be a stay at home mom for a while.
about me: I graduated with a bachelors in Psychology a few years ago, but I'm not using it. My husband is the breadwinner, but at some point in my life I wanna go back to school and have a career as well. I was thinking nursing since I love science and anything related to the body. Down the road, I could pursue psychiatric NP because there's a program locally that accepts RNs with non-nursing bachelors, so that's an option once I gained experience.
I have most of the prerequisites already done from previous schooling. The only problem is I've missed the cutoff date for the 2016 fall school year for the local nursing program, and would have to wait until 2017. I would be 30 by the time I graduated,
So my questions are:
1)Should I have kid(s) soon, and just go to nursing school in my mid 30s once they are school age? Or should I go to school now and push off having a family for a while?
2) once we start having kids, ideally I would like to be a stay at home mom until they were preschool age--if I were to do nursing school before kids, is it difficult to transition into a per diem job so that I can spend most of my time at home while they're super little?
3) is it worth it?
Also, I'm definitely not working once I'm back in school, so I figure the rigors of nursing school might be manageable even with kids. I don't know.
blech, I don't know what to do! What would you do? Sorry this is so long!
Go to school first! Trust me, it's less of a headache.
I have two little ones and I am 25. It is a headache trying to balance classes, working, caring for them. I like to think school should be a priority before having them. I get that the biological clock starts to tick at a certain point and I believe that if you are to pursue nursing, make sure your affairs are in order. I'm not saying it cannot be done. Babies take an incredibly emotional and physical toll on people. Imagine trying to study for a test with a colicky baby or dealing with a partner who is stressed from caring for the children.
if you do put off kids till after school, you have one less stressor off the table. If I had to do it all again, I'd be a college graduate first, mother second. You need a GREAT support system. You need back up plan B,C,D when childcare falls through. You may have to miss important milestones in your children's lives cause of school demands. You just have to ask yourself what is the bigger priority for you at this point?
I'd put the kids until after you get a 2 year degree. My thinking is this:
Your husband gets laid off or some other tragedy, your kind of screwed. I don't intend this next part to be mean, because I have a useless history degree. The psyche degree isn't going to do much for you. If you hold off on having kids and get the 2 year degree you have a back up prof. in case there are any issues with your husband's job. After you get the degree have kids if you want, your career will be waiting on you. But if you go the kids route first than a lost job means you may have to work to make money, and/or you will be raising kids which makes things harder. I understand you want to be around while your kids are young, but having a back up nursing job available means your husband can hold down the fort while you work.
Your husband is the best one to talk to. Before going back to school I saved for a few years, quit my job and focused full time on getting my degree. My wife (or sugarmomma), is taking care of the day to day bills and I supplement with what I saved.
Specializes in Oncology (Prior: Ortho-Neuro, Metabolic Surgery).
If you want kids and can afford to slow or delay school, then have kids. I'm a pre-nursing student and many of my classmates are pregnant and even more have small children. It can be done and has been done.
I'm actually a returning student for my second degree. My first was a non-nursung bachelor degree. I had kids at 22 and 28. My second was my miracle baby due to secondary infertility from premature ovarian failure. If I had waited, then I would not have had any children.
Hidden fertility problems are becoming more common. I would suggest getting a full fertility work up to check your hormone levels if you can afford to pay for the labs out of pocket.
Another thing to consider is whether you would rather have kids in school or be pregnant with a new job. School can often be more flexible, at least during the prerequisites.
Specializes in Oncology (Prior: Ortho-Neuro, Metabolic Surgery).
I also saw that you have many prerequisites done. Be aware that science classes, specifically biology and chemistry, expire after a set number of years. My school allows sciences to be up to 7 years old, but I've also seen 5 and 10. Stay on top of that so you don't have to repeat classes.
Another thing I want to mention is staying home with kids while they are young. I'll admit that this is exactly what I am doing. Now that they are both in school, I am also in school. Child care is expensive, but it isn't always terrible. Maybe consider if you have family nearby who can help. During the summer I barter with a friend by giving her fresh veggies and handmade items. I have also traded babysitting hours with another friend.
My mother always said, make sure you're able to take care of yourself financially, at all times, without relying on a man. So, get your career sorted out before you have kids. She was wise, get the RN qualification first!
I know this post is old, but maybe someone else will come across this.. if you can plan things out, get your schooling done first. Then you can work as you’re able. Nursing school schedule isn’t that flexible and it can be really hard to work out childcare.
Livetoride
169 Posts
Go to school first! Trust me, it's less of a headache.
I have two little ones and I am 25. It is a headache trying to balance classes, working, caring for them. I like to think school should be a priority before having them. I get that the biological clock starts to tick at a certain point and I believe that if you are to pursue nursing, make sure your affairs are in order. I'm not saying it cannot be done. Babies take an incredibly emotional and physical toll on people. Imagine trying to study for a test with a colicky baby or dealing with a partner who is stressed from caring for the children.
if you do put off kids till after school, you have one less stressor off the table. If I had to do it all again, I'd be a college graduate first, mother second. You need a GREAT support system. You need back up plan B,C,D when childcare falls through. You may have to miss important milestones in your children's lives cause of school demands. You just have to ask yourself what is the bigger priority for you at this point?