Nurses who gossip and talk behind your back.

[CrystalClear75]

I found throughout nursing school and working in the hospital that alot of nurses seem to be crabby and often talk nasty stuff about their coworkers and I find it very petty. Is this a way of relieving stress or what? The bad attitudes of many nurses(there are some nice ones) is one of the reasons why I'm dreading the thought of going back to work. The nurses "eating their young" is such a horrible situation to be in, and I'm about to face it. In addition to what I've seen and experienced, there are some posts that I've been reading lately just on all nurses that brought back memories. Alot of these posts included so much bitterness and nastiness that it makes me sick.

I'm studying for my NCLEX exam at the moment. How can I tolerate certain people? How can I tolorate the nastiness and gossip that I've seen over the last few years? I wish this stuff doesn't bother me but it does.

Btw, I don't expect nurses to act all "hunky dory" and happy all day, but I'm talking about the ones(many) who are hardly ever nice, especially to students and new nurses.

I just needed to get this off my chest...maybe this is all I need...either way I gotta deal with it.

[Moneypitt]

Gossip and two faced behavior are going on in offices, stores, restaurants ect.....

Human nature is all about gossip. Star Magazine, Entertainment tonight, Dominic Dunns Power and Privilage TV show. Law and Order ripped from the headlines. See a trend here? Gossip and Backstabbing, and Cutting Deals.

Nurses are just people.

[Daytonite, BSN, RN]

The gossip is only a small fraction of my concern, I guess it's mostly the bad "attitudes" that concern me. Maybe I should have titled the thread "Nurses with bad attitudes." But really, I can't stand it when I see someone talk crap about someone and then be all nice to their face, and I've seen that so much in the nursing field it isn't even funny(oh and in nursing school, yup).

Oh, well, the bad attitude people aren't going anywhere in their careers. Negativity is a dead end. I've seen that so-o-o-o much. When I was promoted into supervision and then management I realized why--I wasn't a complainer or always making negative comments about changes that had to be made. No one likes working with constant negativity. If there are enough of those kind of people around, the whole feeling of the place just goes to the dogs and the good people get run off. The sad thing is that these people don't see how destructive their behavior is on everybody else, nor will they open up to seeing it.

I have such a hard time responding to posts made by people like that. What is especially sad is when a bad attitude comes from a student who isn't even graduated yet! I can't help but wonder what manager in their right mind is going to hire someone like that. How, I wonder, do they successfully hide this negativity during their hiring interviews?

[RedCell]

Being "crabby" and talking behind each others backs is just what women do regardless of the profession. Learn how to let it go, or find a ward where you work with mostly men. Before I got into anesthesia school I worked in an open heart recovery unit staffed by all dudes on nights including the secretary. Best time ever in my nursing career. Got more patients extubated and lines pulled than any other time in the unit. On top of that we had a sheiite load of fun doing it. The only young thing we ate were donuts fresh from crispy kreme.

[CrystalClear75, BSN, RN]

You guys are right it isn't ONLY the nurses who gossip and have bad attitudes, I waitressed for 8 years and the restaurant business is notrious for this behavior too. Although it seems to aggravate me more now with the nurses considering I'm a new Graduate nurse and all. It's sad how caddy people(some women) can be.

Thanks for letting me vent!

[CrystalClear75, BSN, RN]

then they just gossip about your work

That's exactly what I'm talking about, especially when your new. Thank you.

[Baby*Pink]

It is definitely true that it is just woman-nature to gossip and be nasty to each other... but nurses are supposed to be in nursing because they are nice, caring, and good-hearted people. So why can't nurses just be nice and caring and good-hearted people to each other as well?! I don't start my job until January but I am definitely nervous because there are just SO many threads about coworkers, preceptors, managers, etc being mean to people!

[CrystalClear75, BSN, RN]

nurses are supposed to be in nursing because they are nice, caring, and good-hearted people. So why can't nurses just be nice and caring and good-hearted people to each other as well?!

Very good point.:)

I see your from TEXAS, I heard somewhere that Texas folk are really nice people so you shouldn't have to worry about that...actually a nurse told me that!:chuckle She moved to PA from Texas and wants to go back so bad because she said the people here are rude. I'm not sure just how true that is, I've never been to Texas.

[Baby*Pink]

Haha welllll I can agree with her. I was born in Texas and then moved up to NJ and lived there for about 11 years. And it was 11 years too long!!! People up north are just much different compared to people in the south. I don't want to be mean and say they are rude because not ALL people up there are rude.. but it is definitely just a different culture.

[meadow85]

Yeah it was a real shock for me when I graduated as well. My first job was great because I had my placement there prior to graduation. The nurses took me under their wing. Some of the younger ones were a bit catty though. Opposite of what you would expect.

At my new place, it was the "nurses eating their young" scenerio. I find myself being less nice now. Nasty sometimes, unfortunately. I have my guard up and am very private because I learned my lesson. People have lost my trust. I was given a hard time from some senoir staff. Calling me out on such small things in front of everyone or calling me at home to basically accuse me of things and yell at me and then hang up on me?! Meanwhile its ok when she makes a mistake. I know they are trying to "teach" me but there are nicer ways of going about it. I find myself being meaner but you gotta grow some thick skin or you get walked all over ... dont get me wrong I am a genuinely nice person. Too nice for my own good but a nasty side comes out at work because you gotta grow thick skin and stand up for yourself or you get walked all over ....

[CrystalClear75, BSN, RN]

dont get me wrong I am a genuinely nice person. Too nice for my own good but a nasty side comes out at work because you gotta grow thick skin and stand up for yourself or you get walked all over ....

I think I'm too nice, and that's the problem. I've been treated unfairly as a nurse extern, and I still remained nice, and I think when you come off that way, certain people prey on you maybe for control reasons...who knows.

I am going to have thick skin this time, I'm not going to be mean, but I'm not going to be super nice either.

[Magsulfate, BSN, RN]

Very good point.:)

I see your from TEXAS, I heard somewhere that Texas folk are really nice people so you shouldn't have to worry about that...actually a nurse told me that!:chuckle She moved to PA from Texas and wants to go back so bad because she said the people here are rude. I'm not sure just how true that is, I've never been to Texas.

Actually, it is true. It's a rare moment when I'm walking into a store or building and a man who's going before me doesn't hold the door for me and tip his hat (if he has one). That's just one example. The drivers are also more courtious, for the most part. :) I Love Texas

[mscsrjhm]

One of the main reason I have worked agency for 20+ years- to stay out of the politics and pettiness.

I have seen very good working environments, with good, friendly nurses who just want to do their job and get along. Most of the floor staff attitudes seem to reflect administration's attitudes. Management sets a tone. I believe poor work ethics and poor attitude must be stopped immediately, any tolerance just seems to be taken as encouragement from the perpetrator (for lack of a better word). Give them an inch...

Good, honest, hardworking employees leave, and that is when the problems really start.