nurses with Bipolar Disorder

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Feb 21, 2016

Hi there! I'm a 'retired' RN with bipolar 1 who had to leave nursing because of the stress. For the longest time I didn't know how to manage my illness properly, and unfortunately it cost me my career. I burned too many bridges and now I couldn't work as a nurse even if I wanted to because of my history of job-hopping and bad ends to my jobs, especially before I was diagnosed. It took over three years and a hospitalization before I finally got the medication "cocktail" right. Now I'm pretty stable and I wish sometimes that I could go back...but I know I can't, so I try not to dwell on it too much.

That being said, there is no reason for you to follow in my footsteps. Many nurses with BP do very well as long as their illness is being treated adequately. This usually means meds and/or therapy, as well as a healthy lifestyle (which for me is the hardest part of the equation). Also, have something to do outside of work that stirs your passions and satisfies the longings of your soul. This reduces your stress levels and makes you feel good about yourself in the bargain. One of the things we tend to do is to get our identities so tied up with what we do for a living that we forget who we are. Be sure to leave room for YOU in your own life!

I hope some other nurses will come along here who are able to manage their careers successfully while battling bipolar disorder. I know many of them and their stories are most inspiring. :)

KThurmond · Feb 22, 2016

[quote=VivaLasViejas86Hi there! I'm a 'retired nurse with bipolar 1 who had to leave nursing because of the stress. For the longest time I didn't know how to manage my illness properly, and unfortunately it cost me my career. I burned too many bridges and now I couldn't work as a nurse even if I wanted to because of my history of job-hopping and bad ends to my jobs, especially after I was diagnosed. It took over three years and a hospitalization before I finally got the medication "cocktail" right. Now I'm pretty stable and I wish sometimes that I could go back...but I know I can't, so I try not to dwell on it too much.

That being said, there is no reason for you to follow in my footsteps. Many nurses with BP do very well as long as their illness is being treated adequately. This usually means meds and/or therapy, as well as a healthy lifestyle (which for me is the hardest part of the equation). Also, have something to do outside of work that stirs your passions and satisfies the longings of your soul. This reduces your stress levels and makes you feel good about yourself in the bargain. One of the things we tend to do is to get our identities so tied up with what we do for a living that we forget who we are. Be sure to leave room for YOU in your own life!

I hope some other nurses will come along here who are able to manage their careers successfully while battling bipolar disorder. I know many of them and their stories are most inspiring. :)

Hey. I'm sorry to hear about your unfortunate past but I'm glad your doing better. Thanks for replying. I'm not going to let it stop me because I have a great therapist and I'm medication, but a part of me worries still. I appreciate you telling me that you know of nurses who don't have that issue. Thank you.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Feb 25, 2016

Bumping up thread for more responses (hopefully). I'd like some of the other nurses with BP to talk to you about how they manage their careers and illnesses successfully. :)

KThurmond · Feb 25, 2016

Thank you.

SpEdtacular, MSN, RN, EMT-P · Feb 26, 2016

Hey OP,

I have been dealing with Bipolar II since I was 12 and know how you feel. In addition to taking my medication religiously, I do a whole lot of venting to my poor husband, utilize my cats for intensive pet therapy, and try not to let me get the best of myself by keeping things in perspective, which doesn't always work (I was recently set off by an encounter with a difficult patient and it took me about a week and a half to get it out of my system).

I avoid overworking myself and doing things that disagree with my condition (e.g. night shift), which it sounds like you are trying to do already. Once in a blue moon i'll take a mental health sick day (which I always feel guilty about even though I probably shouldn't). Having a regular routine is really important and will help protect against your depression crippling you. I also spoke with my doctor about dealing with exacerbations of my symptoms and every now and then I take an extra half a Seroquel (but please don't do anything like that without talking to your doctor first!).

I don't know exactly what aspect of the job is making you stressed, but sometimes when a job is extra stressful it's because you're in a toxic work environment. In that case, changing jobs may be what it takes to even things out. Sometimes a bad work environment isn't as obvious as you'd think either. I worked at a hospital that was poorly run, but I loved my coworkers to death. They were nice people and wonderful, competent nurses, but the stress from the way the place was run was making me and other staff members physically ill. My new job isn't stress free, but it's not toxic.

Even if it's not a toxic environment, it could be that you're in the wrong line of nursing. Being a med/surg nurse is very different from being an OR nurse and being an OR nurse is very different from being an ED nurse. All of those things are nursing, but they require very different skills and attract people with different temperaments. It's important to find your nursing niche.

It's frustrating having to deal with limitations caused by mental illness (like finding a full time day position as a new grad because you can't work nights...) but it doesn't mean that you can't still be an awesome nurse.

KThurmond · Feb 26, 2016

Thank you for the advice. I'm a student. When I was in a LPN program I had my diagnostic episode. I'm starting over from scratch for a BSN program. I guess thats another reason I'm so nervous. I know I can't ruin it this time.

SpEdtacular, MSN, RN, EMT-P · Feb 26, 2016

I made it through paramedic school and nursing school. It's not easy, but it can be done! :yes:

KThurmond · Feb 26, 2016

I'm looking forward to it. I really enjoyed bein in the nursing program. I'm the wierd one who hears about a condition/scenerio and wants to see it. My sister thinks I'm nuts

poppycat, ADN, BSN · Feb 26, 2016

I actually read the original post on the day it was written but chose not to respond because I have been in kind of an angry mood for almost a week. On Wednesday I finally realized that's my first symptom of a manic episode approaching. I got on the phone to my doctor & got one of my meds adjusted to turn me back around. I wish that one of these days I would tumble to the fact that this is what's happening before I go around yelling at my husband for a week.

I went through nursing school back in the mid-70's & had lots of trouble with anxiety & depression. That continued until 2005 when I finally found a psychiatrist who looked a little deeper &, after taking an exhaustive history, diagnosed me with Bipolar 2. It took several years to finally get the right combination of meds but I feel so much better now than I used to. I have more problems with depression than mania and I've never had a full-blown manic episode. I have "hypomanic" episodes & when they are at their worst, I spend huge amounts of money on things I don't need.

I also still have anxiety issues pretty often. I don't take any meds for anxiety because I don't like how they make me feel. I use guided imagery to get me through the anxiety attacks.

I left hospital nursing in 2007 and have been doing private duty home care since then. For about a year now I've been feeling like I want to go back to hospital nursing & I have my resume posted on several job boards. However, every time a recruiter calls saying they have positions that might interest me, I find myself not following through on sending them more information about myself. I finally realized a few weeks ago that I think my subconscious is telling me that going back to that kind of stressful job would not be good for me. I've decided I'm going to listen to my subconscious mind & stop looking for a hospital job.

I've always worked night shift & it hasn't caused any problems with the bipolar. I'm also not as well-disciplined as Viva where my sleep is concerned. I sleep pretty well during the day in between my nights of work but on my days off I stay up all day & sleep at night.

It's hard dealing with bipolar & nursing school (even though I didn't know back then that it was bipolar) but it's definitely possible. You just need to be aware of what you're feeling & what those feelings mean.

One piece of advice: don't be too hard on yourself!

Good luck!

SpEdtacular, MSN, RN, EMT-P · Feb 26, 2016

You just need to be aware of what you're feeling & what those feelings mean.
Good luck!

That there is the key! You can't always change the way you feel, but you can change the way you think, and changing the way you think can help you deal with those feelings. :smug:

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Feb 26, 2016

I'm also not as well-disciplined as Viva where my sleep is concerned. .

I'm not so good lately as you make me out to be. For the past couple of weeks I've been going to bed around 0100--0200 and sleeping till 0900 or so. I'm getting adequate sleep, but I'm a little hypomanic right now and I don't know if the change in my sleep pattern is a consequence of that, or if the hypomania is happening because my sleep is out of whack. At any rate, I'm enjoying the upswing despite some irritiability. Spring is busting out all over and there are cherry blossoms already appearing on the trees, even though it's still technically late winter. Seasons always seem to have an effect on my moods, and this time of year I am particularly vulnerable to hypo/mania. So I'm going to have to discipline myself again, get back on my sleep schedule and take my PRN, otherwise I risk progressing to full-blown mania and THAT must be avoided at all costs.