Not what I expected

ArtClassRN, ADN, RN · Mar 26, 2016

BSN in December of 2014. By May of 2015 I landed a job at the Cleveland Clinic on a med-surg telemetry floor. Not my first choice, in fact, I've always hated med-surg,

New grads who "always hated med-surg" are...not real fun to be around.

was told time and time again to start there because you get such great experience, yada yada.

Burnt out nurse after, oh zero minutes on the floor. Yada yada is right.

I am desperately looking for new jobs. I job hunt at home, I job hunt at work, I look into different degrees.

Excellent, these are positive steps!

I am on days, part time (2 12s a week), and that has helped my stress, but I still have huge flare ups of IBS before a shift.

That sucks, I am sorry to hear that. It is very good you are looking at options.

Despite my hours and hours of searching and applying to jobs, I have only just recently as I approach a year started to hear back from a few, 2 with interviews.

If you think about it, it is a heckuva good thing that a new grad with very little experience is getting any interviews at all.

The one interview was far too much commuting to the other side of Cleveland for me and constantly going to different locations. Not OK with that.

So, no bedside nursing....and no non-bedside nursing?

The second one was through Fresenius and it's for a chronic dialysis position. Now, I don't have a huge passion for dialysis but I do think it's very interesting, I like the idea of being in a little bit of a "manager" role, and the hours are better in terms of rarely any Sundays and no Christmas, Thanksgiving, or New Years Day shifts. But I am so afraid that I go into this job (the offer may or may not come tomorrow) and decide I still hate being a nurse.

I've done lot of work in Renal. Dialysis is not an easy gig. It sounds as if you are attracted to this job for all the time you don't have to be there. That makes life pretty rough when you are there.

I would love to do case management or nursing informatics or some sort of support role but the problem I am finding is that no where will hire a nurse with under 3 years experience into those roles.

May I suggest paying your dues in a challenging environment at a world renowned facility before you feel entitled to those sweet gigs?

I have also thought about outpatient surgery and truly believe that would be my favorite kind of nursing as I've done it in the past as just an unlicensed helper (stocking rooms and setting up sterile fields when in school).

Sounds like something to look into. (Those outpatient gigs often prefer experience as well.)

Another thing I've looked into is holistic nursing or just doing nursing vlogs/working from home in some way.

Great work if you can get someone to pay you for it.

Honestly, I'm a fairly "lazy" person.

Perhaps sit on that one in interviews. Just a suggestion.

Why didn't you know it would be like this?... I think I was just dumb, young, and hopeful.

So was just about every single one of us. (Admittedly, I was actually dumb, *middle-aged*, and hopeful. I'm still hopeful and only slightly less dumb.)

My school constantly told us we would have no trouble getting jobs.

You didn't have any trouble.

We were told over and over how great nursing is and that you can do "anything" with it.

That's true. What they perhaps utterly failed to stress with you individually is that you have to work your buns off for that "anything."

But unless you know a guy who knows a guy it feels like majority have to get stuck with the sh*t.

Are you kidding? You don't need to know a guy - YOU are THE GUY! You got a coveted position as a new grad and you think it's crap.

And I know nurses who looooove med-surg... but I am not one of them.

Med surg is butt-busting work. I love my job, but I don't love med surg nursing. But I'm gonna put about 10,000 hours into it, perhaps put a stint in the ICU and THEN search out those stellar 9-5 gigs.

Thoughts?

Buck up, buttercup. Got to pay your dues if you wanna sing the blues. It appears you think that comes easy.

[DELETED RANT ABOUT BASIC NURSING ISSUES AND SKILLS HERE]

ittibittinurse · Mar 26, 2016

Never heard of a lazy nurse being a good nurse. Case management is stressful. Those nurses who work 3 years and go into case management or become nurse practitioners don't really k kW much or have experienced much...I find that they need at least 8 years of bedside experience before they are really ready to go to that next level...as for building you up, you seem to lack confidence in yourself, confidence in yourself is very important...when you exude self-confidence...others will want to build you up...this is my opinion of course...also, I think you need to continue in your current position and get more experience..I wish you well and hope you find your dream nursing job.

lifelearningrn, BSN, RN · Mar 26, 2016

Have you thought of well baby nursery? Yeah, you'll still have stress and annoyances but drug seeking and combative is off the table!

RegularNurse · Mar 26, 2016

You work at one of the premiere health care institutions in the world, and are a new grad. Reflect on that for a minute.

I think you should quit. Find your niche somewhere else. There are thousands of unemployed new grads who would love to switch places with you right now. Nursing is not for you, and you will never work as a bedside nurse long enough to get the experience necessary to create value in any non-clinical role. Life is too short to be miserable.

Think about why nurses are hired to be case managers, informaticists, or directors. Nurses possess a keen insight into the practicalities of patient care and offer pragmatic solutions. If you don't have the experience, you can't create value. For non-clinical, and especially leadership jobs, you need to bring a lot to the table for an offer.

Seriously look at other industries. You only work two days a week. Volunteer or do an internship somewhere. You probably have great skills and talents, nursing just might not be the field to showcase them. Best of luck going forward.

Jensmom7, BSN, RN · Mar 26, 2016

Have you thought of well baby nursery? Yeah, you'll still have stress and annoyances but drug seeking and combative is off the table!

Is this even a possibility in today's culture? I would think that all the nurses in the OB department would be cross trained with the expectation of filling in wherever they are needed.

I haven't been a hospital nurse in over 10 years, but back then, OB/newborn nursery was a "no float" unit. Meaning they didn't have to float to other units, but also got no help in the form of floats FROM other units. They covered themselves and floated within OB.

la_chica_suerte85, BSN, RN · Mar 26, 2016

It's not what you expected.....yet. I am still a student (officially 83 days until graduation :eek: ) but I know the pain of being somewhere that is not a good fit and wanting to claw through the walls to get away from a place you hate. What I learned through those experiences, though, is that a lot of it is what you make of it. If you can get to the point where adapt and don't have that "brand-new-grad smell" anymore, it will become a lot easier. When I'm in a situation like that, though, I try to go head first into it so I can get through that hard part faster (read: I would work as much OT as possible to get fully acclimated until I am numb to the unpleasant novelties of the place). I know that trying to work more would be soul searing for you, however, especially given the health problems you have going on. So, with that in mind....

First, please be kind to yourself. Examine if there are things you need to do more of to take care of you. Don't judge yourself for feeling badly about any of this. Acknowledge your feelings, understand that it's ok to feel that way, and reaffirm to yourself that it is temporary, like all things in life.

Second, life is too short to feel this way for any extended period of time. Ten months is not quite long enough to truly become adjusted to a place (I know they say 1 year is about enough but for me personally, I know it takes much longer so I allow myself to go through what I go through, knowing that, though it takes longer, it will pass) and I think you should give yourself a little bit longer. Try your best to leave on a high note if you still end up leaving.

Third, please acknowledge the fact that you work with awesome people at an awesome place. Let your heart absolutely fill to the brim with gratitude about it. It will help you to focus on the positive things and make the day go by more quickly. The more you practice this and make a habit out of it, the easier it will be to let the negative aspects slide off your back. When you start to feel the overwhelming pain of the negative aspects, try and tell yourself, "Water off a duck's back." Laugh so you don't cry. Look at it as a challenging time to push through and overcome.

Finally, I hope you don't write nursing off all together. You're going through a rough patch. You have a lot to deal with but try and approach it from a point of gratitude because you're going to end up a lot stronger than you were before you started. Good luck and I wish you the best!

Larry2016 · Mar 26, 2016

Meg,

I just read over your reply. I don't think I assumed in my response you were a traditional student...just that you were a new grad. I'm 43 and I will be a new grad in may.

Larry2016 · Mar 26, 2016

I guess to relate a little more to what Meg said. Patients don't frustrate me. I care for every patient I have...and, quite honestly, when I was a tech i never got frustrated at patients.

What I got frustrated with was staff who were backbiting each other, looked down on aides and techs, and saw them not providing safe patient care because of hospital policy (which, by the way, contradicted everything we learned about safe effective care regarding a specific disease process at that hospital). I don't get stressed out by patients much. The only time I had to leave a patients room wad because I was punched and bitten by a dementia patient and she drew blood after biting me. I had to leave for infection control.

I understand some people cannot deal with the stress level of med surg. Most of it is not due to patients, though. It's due to staff.

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Mar 27, 2016

Thank you Nutella and idodialysis for giving me some feed back on the dialysis side of things. I really appreciate it and love the idea of shadowing. I will probably not accept the dialysis job if offered, I had a feeling it wasn't quiet right for me.
Been there done that: I have been told "suck it up" more time than I can count. But I can't do this job another year and two months because of medical conditions. I honestly think I will implode from stress and do believe my IBS and dermatitis are starting to cause other issues because of the flare ups. I would love to be able to stick it out for three years and get that experience because I could literally do anything I wanted after that... But I just can't. I thought this forum was supposed to help build people up? Maybe next time you can help give a little bit more constructive feedback instead of making me feel worse (don't need help there). I know I am lucky to have a job at a good company. I am a detail oriented person and can't "ignore" the details. People like you made me leave this site in the first place.

"People like you made me leave this site in the first place." I am not people. I am a highly experienced nurse that cared enough to tell you what you needed to know.

Wishing you the best of luck with your 10 months of experience.

NurseMegP, BSN, RN · Mar 27, 2016

Again, those who have constructive feedback, I really appreciate it. It takes heart to help a stranger over the Internet who is struggling with her career choices. I honestly leave my loathing of med-surg at home when I go into work. I care for all of my patients equally and do take a lot of pride in my work. I make sure I get the necessary tasks done. My manager has even said she forgot that I am still not at year of experience because of how well I have been doing. I am a very quick learner and I know I am a great nurse. It's not that I can't do med-surg it is just not my calling. The supportive jobs (like case manager) and things like it are what get me excited.

I decided to decline the dialysis position. Hopefully I can make it to my one year and just keep praying that I will be guided to where I am meant to be.

nutella, MSN, RN · Mar 28, 2016

Again, those who have constructive feedback, I really appreciate it. It takes heart to help a stranger over the Internet who is struggling with her career choices. I honestly leave my loathing of med-surg at home when I go into work. I care for all of my patients equally and do take a lot of pride in my work. I make sure I get the necessary tasks done. My manager has even said she forgot that I am still not at year of experience because of how well I have been doing. I am a very quick learner and I know I am a great nurse. It's not that I can't do med-surg it is just not my calling. The supportive jobs (like case manager) and things like it are what get me excited.
I decided to decline the dialysis position. Hopefully I can make it to my one year and just keep praying that I will be guided to where I am meant to be.

I think it was probably for the better that you declined dialysis.

In any way, look into 8 hour shifts to see if that would be better with your conditions and stress.

The other suggestion I have is to see a therapist for a while if you can afford it to increase your coping skills with stress and chronic conditions. Stress is always part of nursing, I do not think that there is a nursing job that is really stress free or very low on stress. I had a variety of jobs and surprisingly enough my work in critical care was the one that was the least stressful! Great support system, only one patient - sometimes 2. Great coworkers, always a lunch/dinner break. I found acute dialysis second place when it comes to stress although some people cannot deal with that kind of stress.

I know case managers who leave that job because the stress in the hospital or field is too much for them.

Try to keep your job and level out other factors that make it harder for you. Once you have more experience, nursing will also get easier! After I came from critical care I had a terrible year in med/surg - it really took me a year to adjust to the amount of patient, stress and multitasking.

beckster_01, BSN, RN · Mar 28, 2016

Umm this sounds crazy, and not in the general trend of the thread, but have you thought about ICU?

It is NOT low stress, but the stress comes from a different source. Yes your patients are noncompliant, but that is what got them in ICU so unless they want to sign a DNR they darned better do what you tell them too. If families aren't behaving you can still kick them out, because "patient family centered care" still means the patient needs to be cared for. If someone tries to give my NPO patient food they are out of there. You need to be detail oriented. You need to know their whole history and apply it to their current situation. I have found that even though critical care nurses are "crusty" they excel in teamwork when it really matters.

Beyond the stress of having very sick patients, you can anticipate management increasing your workload, for example at my job we not only run CRRT but set up, tear down, and troubleshoot the sets. These patients used to be 1:1 but they are paired now. Also ethical issues can be difficult to deal with. But if you like the core of your job you will find it easier to deal with the sludge.