Night Folks, I need your input!

[In_Chantress]

I've worked 6p-6a for 2 years now... and I think I've adjusted very well. However, it's transitioning back to the real world schedule that is causing problems. My DH thinks that I sleep too much... because when he's sleeping, I'm awake. Oh, we have about 8-10 hours together on my 3 days off and I reserve the day after my three shifts to catch up on sleep (especially since I'm on-call that night). What do I do? Here's another night I can't sleep, do I take caffeine or diet pills to stay awake... forcing myself into the daylight or is there a gentler way? The way I've been doing it up until now works for me but not him. All suggestions are welcome!

[casi, ASN, RN]

Adjusting day off schedules is a two way street. He needs to give a little too. If it means that on the night before his day off he stays up until midnight with you, or on his mornings off he gets up early and makes you breakfast, so be it.

What I do when I have a strech of days off is I take a 4 hour nap when I get home from work. Then I go to bed earlier that night.

I would advise against the pills, but I will admit that when I need to be awake and I've barely had any sleep. They really mess with my system and while you are physically awake you aren't always mentally awake.

[mom4josh]

My feeling is that it is much harder to stay awake nights than it is days and work 12 hours on top of it. If your sleeping during your first day off is while he is at work and not taking away time together, what does it matter? Sorry, but it annoys me when people say "you're sleeping too much," because they don't know how you feel or what your body needs. You have to do what works for you, otherwise you won't be able to function. I know people say you can never really catch up on lost sleep, but your body still needs rest. Get it when you can and tell your DH to lay off.

[deeDawntee, RN]

When the guy says "you sleep too much" what is he REALLY saying?

Probably something like, "I miss you" or "I want to spend more time with you". Unfortunately, some guys don't have the insight to say what they really mean. Personally, as a fellow night nurse, I would not change my sleep schedule if what I am doing is working for me. Lack of enough sleep is devastating to me personally and my entire life would suffer if I attempted to alter it much. I would talk to him and see if there is other ways you can have more time together, (if indeed that is what he wants). It is kinda sweet really... maybe you two need a date or some time away together??

Good luck!!

[wooh, BSN, RN]

If he's working days, he's the one with the easier sleep schedule to stay adjusted if he alters it. If he wants more time with you, HE needs to adjust. (And I say this as someone who used to work nights, but now works days, with a husband that works nights. If someone's sleep is going to get messed up, I try to make it MINE because I'm the dayshifter now.)

[AngBthatsme]

Hi

I've worked nights for 5 years. I love it. On my first night off I sleep 3-4 hours and get up, that way I'm a littled rested, but I'll be tired that night. Day people have no idea what it is to be a night shifter! I truly have so much pep all night long and as soon as that sun comes up....I'm falling asleep. You'll find what works for you.

Hi

FI

[All_Smiles_RN]

My first day off (leaving work at 7:30am) I go home and sleep until 2pm on average and then go to bed at a normal hour that night. Some days though, I need to sleep until 4pm or 5pm immediately after I work. That's just getting 8 hours sleep on the days I "sleep in". You have to listen to your body to make it through nights, as I'm sure you know. Smack your hubby upside the head and tell him to try nights. lol. ok no spousal abuse. i'm sure you can handle it more tactfully than me ;-)

[loricatus]

Wake hubbie up in the middle of the night and tell him that he's getting too much sleep, that you want some company while you are on call. :wink2: Bet he won't say much about your sleeping habits after that. You have to do what's best for you, not him.

[TrudyRN]

Wake hubbie up in the middle of the night and tell him that he's getting too much sleep, that you want some company while you are on call. :wink2: Bet he won't say much about your sleeping habits after that. You have to do what's best for you, not him.

:yeahthat: Well, that would certainly be a graphic lesson. It might wreak havoc, though, with your relationship.

I think the poster above who said you should figure out what your DH is really saying is right on. Good luck.

[EmmaG, RN]

Wake hubbie up in the middle of the night and tell him that he's getting too much sleep, that you want some company while you are on call. :wink2: Bet he won't say much about your sleeping habits after that. You have to do what's best for you, not him.

That's exactly what I did to get my family to realize I MUST sleep during the day.

I only had to do it once, too: "Are you going to sleep all night?"

Trust me. He'll get the message.