New Nurse, Sinking deep.

Nurses Stress 101

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Hello

I am a new nurse, I work in state where there is definitely some prejudice, the nurses on my unit are all helpful but gossip so much its riduculous. I am so far away from home, by myself, no family close, I am fustrated going to work almost everyday because I can't stand the call bells from people who call for help for things they can do themself, the nurses whispering all night (night shift) about eachother. I don't like to hear it because if they are talking to me about someone then they will talk to someone about me right? I think so. This state is filled with rude, miserable low educated, miserraabblleee, DRY, people. I am here by myself from family, so Im terrified. I hate nursing, but I went to school for 4 years, and dont want it to go to waste. I know that some of the nurses here may like to see me go because I am younger and have a 4 yr degree complared to their 2 yr( which to me makes no difference), and because I am of different culture/race. Im breaking down everyday, and trying to just stick it through for the 9 more months I have here to get my year experience and LEAVE!!! Can someone please give me some insight on things, I am really stuck.

Specializes in Adult/Ped Emergency and Trauma.

Ok, let me try it more bluntly then without the singing frogs and fairy dust.

Do what makes you happy instead of relying on Internet strangers to make huge life impacting decisions for you. My advice, no pity added.

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@BostonterrierloverRN. I appreciate your advice, my post before of pity wasn't directed to you, but to another commenter so don't take it as such. Once again I really appreciate your insight, and I just wanted to hear opinions of others, but I will defnitely make decisions for myself. Thank you. :thankya:

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Hello

I am a new nurse, I work in state where there is definitely some prejudice, the nurses on my unit are all helpful but gossip so much its riduculous. I am so far away from home, by myself, no family close, I am fustrated going to work almost everyday because I can't stand the call bells from people who call for help for things they can do themself, the nurses whispering all night (night shift) about eachother. I don't like to hear it because if they are talking to me about someone then they will talk to someone about me right? I think so. This state is filled with rude, miserable low educated, miserraabblleee, DRY, people. I am here by myself from family, so Im terrified. I hate nursing, but I went to school for 4 years, and dont want it to go to waste. I know that some of the nurses here may like to see me go because I am younger and have a 4 yr degree complared to their 2 yr( which to me makes no difference), and because I am of different culture/race. Im breaking down everyday, and trying to just stick it through for the 9 more months I have here to get my year experience and LEAVE!!! Can someone please give me some insight on things, I am really stuck.

hey I empathise because I went through the same thing!!!!!!!!!!! went from big east coast city to rural usa.by myself without knowing anyone. So all the new grad stress I had to deal with on my own, since I was by myself and no one back home was really interested in hearing any whining etc. .... this website helped a lot! the gossip is everywhere. if you can't beat them , join them or ignore them. no other options. All most everyone where I work does it. it has been done in every job I have worked at and this is my first nursing job. Don't take it personally. 90% of thepeople are talking about 100% of the others. seriously.i was different than all the other small towners etc. it is a different culture even if you are the same race, pretty difficult to adapt to a new job, new location, new culture, etc everything was new new new new new. Can you try finding something to do outside of work? this was very difficult for me since again this is a RURAL AREA. maybe a gym or some type of art/craft/cooking class. all those movies and tv shows on dvd can be distracting.

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Thank you for your insight. I just feel like being culturally and racially different, the other nurses look at me like I dont know anything. talk about me and when I enter, they disperse like I was born yesterday ( and these are 40+ year old nurses with families). And honestly I really dont care because I have gone to school, passed my boards , i know what i can do. but It pities me, and disappoints me that this is what I am going to have to deal with probably for the 9 months left here, and that this is what nursing really is like, they should have prepared us for the B.S. I am positive that bedside nursing isnt for me Im not empathetic. i am a tough lover. i hate feeling sorry for people, because it depresses me very much, i look at myself in the mirror, and i just CANT recognize myslf anymore. Theres a sadness in my voice even when im kinda happy. Im sooo broken right now, everything is overwhelming me. i just dont want to loose myself in this stress before its too late. If this was a career I loved, i dont think I should be feeling this way right. Im now back to finding the connection I had with God that got lost 3 months before I got here, Im so busy worrying that I even forgot about him. :confused::(:sniff::bluecry1::crying2::cry: wow im too sad. it makes no sense, crying helps me sleep.

awwww, yes maybe it is because you are an outsider to the area and a different race but I have seen my coworkers behave the SAME exact way towards newer nurses who are the same race. they treat all the new employees as if they are complete idiots and comment when a new nurse doesn't know a policy or some other thing that varies in every hospital! I would as the other poster said, just keep your mouth shut and do your job, fake it and offer to help etc when you are able to do so. it is difficult to assess how much of it is stress from being in a new area vs the job. I was the same way about nursing and would question why I was putting myself through such misery for a job I did not even want.

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Honestly I am not asking for pity here, Im asking for advise, and for someone to give me an insight if incase I am over emotionalizing or over stressing, or overthinking. I can't progress with people feeling sorry for me, i can progress with people helping me face reality of things so i can make real decisions. . If patients want to complain to me about being in the hospital too long, but ask for help in things they can do like reach for their water pitcher, how can I stand there listening to you complain of hating being in the hospital. and not wanting to walk, because you dont feel ready. And maybe its just me being so annoyed already being here by myself away from family, and fustrated with moving from a life where i had people around me, things to do and fun laughter to a pplace where everyone is miserable, and the state has nothing to do but go to walmart who knows. its why I came to this sight to get some help. But thanks for you input.

sounds more and more like my own story the more i read, right down to the walmart. hahahahaha that was my only source of entertainment for a while. The patients who ask for things to be handed to them when they can stretch out their arms etc, or "dont feel like walking" etc they are part of nursing, that used to annoy me now i don't care. i will wipe their nose, hand them the remote control, hell change the tv channels for the walkie talkies if it keeps them shut up and the pt satisfaction scores up. is this your first nursing job also?

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awwww, yes maybe it is because you are an outsider to the area and a different race but I have seen my coworkers behave the SAME exact way towards newer nurses who are the same race. they treat all the new employees as if they are complete idiots and comment when a new nurse doesn't know a policy or some other thing that varies in every hospital! I would as the other poster said, just keep your mouth shut and do your job, fake it and offer to help etc when you are able to do so. it is difficult to assess how much of it is stress from being in a new area vs the job. I was the same way about nursing and would question why I was putting myself through such misery for a job I did not even want.

I just dont want to loose myself in all this. Ive become more dull than ever, I literally was always energetic and just had this beautifulness about me, and I dont mean by face or looks,(not that Im ugly, lol) but by my soul. I am very reserved, but people will seriously come up to me and say, you are so beautiful, you have this calmess about you, its beautiful. blah blah blah./ Of course around my family I was hoping on the couch and being a wild child, making my family laugh but these days I just wanna wear black and sit down. My spirit is slowly tired, and what you'll feel around me now is tension. my smile is FAKE to the point, I can't snap out of being miserable around my family without having to remind myself that I am home, Im not in that hell hole no more, so I dont have to fake smile and be so miserable. Plus going home sucks because of knowiing that I have to come back. Drive 6 hours back to where I dont want to be.

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hey I empathise because I went through the same thing!!!!!!!!!!! went from big east coast city to rural usa.by myself without knowing anyone. So all the new grad stress I had to deal with on my own, since I was by myself and no one back home was really interested in hearing any whining etc. .... this website helped a lot! the gossip is everywhere. if you can't beat them , join them or ignore them. no other options. All most everyone where I work does it. it has been done in every job I have worked at and this is my first nursing job. Don't take it personally. 90% of thepeople are talking about 100% of the others. seriously.i was different than all the other small towners etc. it is a different culture even if you are the same race, pretty difficult to adapt to a new job, new location, new culture, etc everything was new new new new new. Can you try finding something to do outside of work? this was very difficult for me since again this is a RURAL AREA. maybe a gym or some type of art/craft/cooking class. all those movies and tv shows on dvd can be distracting.

Working out used to be the joy of my day, I mean to the point that if I worked out, my day was set, it was going to be a great day and nothing was going to get in my way of having an amazing day, but so far, when I go to the gym, I find myself struggling to push through a workout, and not because I am physically tired, but emotionally and mentally exhausted. Alot of thinking and worrying drains out your energy more than anything. And when I would go to the gym and leave elated and happier, now I leave the gym now more tense and miserable, and annoyed. Ive always been an independent person, and the brave one in the family. I am the only one who went to school 6 hours away from the rest of my siblings, they all stayed close to home. I was miserable being away, but going there with some friends helped, but now where Im really really alone and by myself, Im breaking down and my family just arent gettign it how miserable i am because they are used to me being super strong. Wow. I feel like I will have a breakdown ONE RANDOM DAY where I may just pack my things, not tell the hospital anything. and just drive far far away somewhere I dont even know. :crying2:

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